Driving ocd

I have driving ocd and overthink everything when it comes to driving. I’m so terrified to be behind the driver seat and it makes me avoid driving at all costs. This is consuming my life and preventing me from doing things that I want to do. My bf lives about 1.5 hrs away and it sucks because I can’t build up the courage to drive to him. And this means everywhere we go he’s driving which is a whole other thing that I overthink. He says he doesn’t mind but I feel terrible and think he’s gonna break up with me bc he has to do it so much. And I can take public transportation but the cherry on top is I’m terrified of that too bc of all the bad scenarios I think can happen and have happened before. And I get embarrassed bc what if other people think it’s embarrassing that I can’t drive and judge me. So much overthinking! But that’s beside the point. How do I get over this? I’m terrified about what other people think what they will do what I’ll do wrong what if I don’t know what to do. Just everything! Does anyone else deal with this?

Gsimi

Date posted: 8h

nah cause why am i always convinced that i’ve hit someone with my car and i wouldnt have realized it

Anonymous

Date posted: 8h

@Gsimi Yes I know what you mean I’m always asking my passenger and I’m like are you sure are you sure and they were like no you would’ve known

Gsimi

Date posted: 6h

@Anonymous i am so glad someone gets this. on bad days i’ll check local forums and police records to make sure

Anonymous

Date posted: 6h

@Gsimi Omg me too. You are not alone in this. It’s so hard to fight those intrusive thoughts and not look for reassurance but we got this! It will get better and we just have to remind ourselves to brush it off:)

Kamryn Mc

Date posted: 8h

omg, this is my first time seeing someone else with this fear. i'm constantly afraid behind the wheel, so much so that one slight hiccup - someone merging too soon, taking a risky turn, even just too harsh of a stop - can drive me to tears, and it drives my family nuts. for me, the best solution i've found so far is listening to music while i drive, since i use music for a lot of emotional regulation. i understand you, and i'm sure your boyfriend does too <:]

Anonymous

Date posted: 8h

@Kamryn McCalister Omg I feel so seen and heard. It brings me to tears too and anytime someone brings up me driving or says that practice helps or I can do it it makes me so angry bc it’s harder than they think. I constantly think something terrible is gonna happen like by me or to me even though I’m so careful. I’m just not confident in my skills. It’s also so hard bc I know I want to be able to drive and anytime I see other girls like me who can drive and are so confident and don’t care it makes me so sad and I envy them and it just makes me feel so sad and lack confidence in myself

kate843

Date posted: 8h

I have to say the best way to get over this is to do it. Make yourself do it. I have severe ocd myself and ik it's wayyyy easier said than done but I know you can do it! Also would be helpful to work with a therapist if you want to/ can. But avoiding driving and public transport, having your bf drive, all the things you mentioned- these are compulsions which are making the cycle worse and reinforcing the idea in your head that you shouldn't drive because it's too risky. It's not gonna be easy, but it's going to be amazing. Good luck!!!!

Anonymous

Date posted: 7h

@kate843 Thank you for your support!! Yes I’m currently working with my therapist and trying to get out there more. I drive everyday but stick to the same route but trying to venture out and take new routes. It’s definitely scary but your support means so much and I’ll keep on trying:)

Hopefloats227

Date posted: 7h

I know it seems scary…. But that’s the OCD trying to control you. As someone said above, making yourself do it will help you stop obsessing. Not driving is avoidance and just keeps the cycle going. Recommend taking shorter drives, or break your long drive up into smaller drives. The only way to the other side is straight through what scares you.

Anonymous

Date posted: 7h

@Hopefloats227 Thank you for your support and insight!! It helps and yeah I’m working towards it but sometimes it’s so hard to get over. I’m taking it step by step though and definitely see a little progress!

Dannyr

Date posted: 1h

If it makes you feel any better, my partner doesn’t drive, and in definitely not going to break up with her because I’m the only one that drives. OCD is telling you that you’re gonna lose someone you hold dearly because it knows you are afraid of losing him. Don’t let the words speak to you. Try shorter drives, even take yourself out for a drive without destination 10 minutes in a direction you don’t usually drive. It might help build your confidence.

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