Mimi123

Date posted: 5y

I'm afraid that I might all of a sudden turn a pedophile! I would never hurt a child and I'm so afraid that all of a sudden I turn into one of those monsters! I feel like I'm near the end of the world! If I notice a kids voice I think that makes me a pedophile! I'm so scared! Today O was having sex with my boyfriend and every type of the intrusive thoughts came into my head and I didn't let it affect me! I remembered saying to myself ok than I quit I'm going to be a old lady which like 17 year olds! And I kept with my sexual intercourse! But at the end I felt bad for thinking that and keep going! I felt like I should have stopped the sex immediately! It doesn't even makes sense my boyfriend is older than me and I'm constantly asking myself are you looking at him because you think he is a little kid!

Lynnrich

Date posted: 5y

I know how you feel it’s soul crushing

Mimi123

Date posted: 5y

But why? It started with Hocd! And my stupid ex-psychologist told me about it and his thoughts about it! It got me this way

Mimi123

Date posted: 5y

I really curse him for having said anything! I've two little cousins which I'm afraid to see!

Mimi123

Date posted: 5y

He ruined my life

Lynnrich

Date posted: 5y

It feels that way but go back to work. Find an ocd specialist and get some meds. That’s what I’m doing. I have a granddaughter who I get huge anxiety around, and I have a tough time just going to the store

Mimi123

Date posted: 5y

Fuck! I hope the meds will help! I only have appointment in 1 mont and a half!

Unknown50

Date posted: 5y

Don’t worry, my friend. Nobody can randomly become a pedophile. It starts early in their life. You are totally okay!

Mimi123

Date posted: 5y

I know but I'm so afraid! And I can't stop thinking about it!

Unknown50

Date posted: 5y

@Mimi123 I know! Picture a stop sign in your head and say “stop” out loud to your thoughts. That helps me a lot.

Mimi123

Date posted: 5y

@Lizard2 I'll try that! That's a good idea! Thank you very much

Lynnrich

Date posted: 5y

I hope you get your meds soon it’ll make a difference

Mimi123

Date posted: 5y

I really hope too! I never hurted any one or looked at children with second thoughts! But my mind keeps saying if I do look than I might turn out to be one

jaff

Date posted: 5y

I struggle with this torture every day, it's the absolute worst of the ocd themes. Mine started in similar way I went to see a therapist not knowing I had ocd, she asked me what kind of porn I watched. I told her normal stuff nothing bad and she said something about if you do you can tell me she asked me have I ever looked at CP. Which I hadn't I didn't think much of about it, but a few days later I saw a picture of a kid and remembered what she said and have had pocd ever since.

Mimi123

Date posted: 5y

Fuck your unlucky as me! I'm so afraid that all of a sudden I start being a Pc addicted! Just because! It's fucking killing my life this shit! I think I see kids every where and than they are just coats or something! And than I say to myself that's because you wanted to see one! It's so stupid! And when I see it gets me so uncomfortable I'm afraid of them! I'm afraid that because I see one I might turn a pedophile

Lynnrich

Date posted: 5y

@Mimi123 That’s exactly what happens to me

Lynnrich

Date posted: 5y

That’s a long time to wait , can you move it up

Mimi123

Date posted: 5y

I wish I could but the others are too expensive!

Mimi123

Date posted: 5y

I've been waiting for this appointment since the 20th of December

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