- Date posted
- 6y ago
- Date posted
- 6y ago
hey! I have rocd too. It really sucks. I think the best exposure is staying in the relationship. Let it run its course. I've been working (for around 3 months now) to let go of the questions i would ruminate over. It's not easy by any stretch, but ultimately there are no answers. Meditation and living in the moment, learning to recognize the "spiral" of OCD thoughts, and simply staying in the relationship and putting in the work have all helped me. The article, "i think it moved" by Steven Phillipson is a really good resource.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Great article. Very knowledgeable clinician. Horrible experience at his clinic.
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Same!! Just know that choosing to stay dedicated to your partner and treating this for what it is - OCD - is the best thing you can do. I broke up with my partner this summer because of ROCD (before I knew what it was) and it actually just made the obsession even worse, because I couldn’t understand why I had ended things and why I wasn’t getting the relief I thought I would. So hang in there, because that’s the best thing you can do to fight this!!
- Date posted
- 6y ago
I have it. I have excessive doubt in relationship. It really really sucks. I am too afraid to get to a stage in therapy well I will be exposed to ROCD obsessions.
- Date posted
- 6y ago
I have ROCD too, I’ve been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years but HOCD has come up more. It totally sucks.
- Date posted
- 6y ago
How long have you been in your relationship?
- Date posted
- 6y ago
I have it too :(
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Same here! It’s so annoying, it’s the start of my relationship ship so those thoughts are really present rn it sucks
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Same here! Almost 9 months of intrusive thoughts and dominating all day every day. But it’s a lot more manageable than before! The frequency hasn’t changed but I’m able to work past them easier. I’m still struggling bad but we will all get there! Keep in mind every experience is different, don’t feel worried that yours isn’t the same as mine. That’s something I ruminated over a lot xx
- Date posted
- 6y ago
I worry because sometimes I see a guy and at times want him more than my boyfriend - not because of the intimacy, but just because it’s something different.
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Hi I have it too! Ur amongst friends! B strong
- Date posted
- 6y ago
I feel physically crippled by it! Don’t worry, there are so many people who know what you’re feeling
- Date posted
- 6y ago
I have it too, didn’t know it was an ocd thing before this app
Related posts
- Date posted
- 11w ago
I'm 18, and been in a relationship with my man for nearly 2 years. I started living with him around 2 months ago, and all I do is think about if he's cheating. We were long distance for a year and a half of our relationship, maybe seeing eachother once every month or two. I decided to move in with him, and ever since all I can think about is if he's cheating or watching porn. When he's in another room I think he's doing something wrong, I have to check on him every ten minutes to ease my anxiety. I didn't have this problem before moving in. Granted he has talked to some girls on his phone, even having his ex on his phone (didn't do anything bad) and he is porn addicted though he is getting better for me. It's gotten so bad I want to leave him. A couple days ago I broke up with him and it absolutely broke my heart, I couldn't bare it so I gave him a month to show me he can do better, and for me to work on myself. If I'm still unhappy with us I'm going to leave. I love this boy more than anything. I'm scared to be without him, this is my first real relationship. At this point I refuse to even sleep until he is sleeping. I don't want to start over, I don't want to leave him, but I really can't take this pain it's causing me. It's all I think about. I've convinced myself so many times that he's cheating, but I know he wouldn't. I question whether it's anxiety or intuition. Maybe I just know deep down he really is cheating and I just don't want to believe it. I don't know. I don't think he would do that, but at the same time he's really into women. I hate that he looks at other girls in a sexual way, it bothers me so much, and we talk about it often, but with it being an addiction it's difficult. He has gotten a lot better since we have talked about it. He understands I have an issue and is usually happy to talk about it over and over and promise me over and over that he's not cheating. He allows me to have his phone whenever I want and everything, I have no reason to think he's cheating, but I can't get over it. It's not fair to him either. How do I deal with this? How do I stop hurting so much?
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 10w ago
Looking back, my introverted nature and struggles to find belonging in high school may have set the stage for how OCD would later impact my relationships. I had my first relationship in high school, but OCD wasn’t a major factor then. It wasn’t until my longest relationship—six years from age 18 to 24—that OCD really took hold. The relationship itself wasn’t the issue; it was what happened after. When it ended, I became obsessed with confessing past mistakes, convinced I had to be completely transparent. Even when my partner was willing to work past them, I couldn’t let go of the intrusive thoughts, and that obsession landed me in the hospital. From there, my struggle with ROCD (Relationship OCD) fully emerged. For years, every time I tried to move forward in dating, doubts consumed me. I would start seeing someone and feel fine, but then the questions would creep in: Do I really like her? Do I find her attractive? Is she getting on my nerves? What if I’m with the wrong person? I’d break things off, thinking I was following my true feelings. But then I’d question: Was that really how I felt, or was it just OCD? I tried again and again, each time hoping I could “withstand it this time,” only to fall back into the same cycle. The back and forth hurt both me and the person I was with. By the time I realized it was ROCD, the damage had been done, and I still hadn’t built the tools to manage it. Now, at 28, I know I need to approach dating differently. I recently talked to someone from a dating app, and my OCD still showed up—questioning my every move, making me doubt my own decisions. I haven’t yet done ERP specifically for ROCD, but I know that’s my next step. Just like I’ve learned tools for managing my other OCD subtypes, I need a set of strategies for when intrusive doubts hit in relationships. My goal this year is to stop letting uncertainty control me—to learn how to sit with doubt instead of trying to “figure it out.” I want to break the cycle and be able to build something healthy without my OCD sabotaging it. I know I’m not alone in this, and I know healing is possible. I’m hopeful that working with a therapist will help me develop exposures and thought loops to practice. I don’t expect to eliminate doubt entirely—after all, doubt is a part of every relationship—but I want to reach a place where it doesn’t paralyze me. Where I can move forward without constantly questioning whether I should. And where I can be in a relationship without feeling like OCD is pulling the strings. I would appreciate hearing about your experiences with ROCD. Please share your thoughts or any questions in the comments below. I’d love to connect and offer my perspective. Thanks!
- Date posted
- 10w ago
Hello, I unknowingly have lived with ROCD or OCD (not sure what one. I’m new to this). It has ruined so many amazing romantic and platonic relationships and I am so sad that just now I am finding out what the hell is wrong with me. Maybe life would be different if I have known. My OCD and anxiety is at an all time high (ATH) due to some horrible events that have happened in the recent months. I am at the point where paranoia has taken over my life now. I had my first panic attack a few weeks ago where I fainted. My anxiety attacks are so extreme I go thought cognitive distortion that has lasted days. My girlfriend of 3 years is my emotional guardian and she no long has the energy to be that and honestly it’s not her responsibility to be that. She is bi and wanted to have an open relationship and for someone who has OCD this has not been good for me. She also was assaulted in my own home by a good friend of ours when I was out of town but it’s not a clear situation because it sounded consensual at first. I just left my very high paying job. I am financially secure but the job was emotionally abusive and looking back made my OCD worse. I am taking some time off to get my head right…but now, all I have to do during the day is live in my OCD. I’m very happy I finally figured out why I act the way I do but I don’t know if I can get better quick enough to save my relationship. I have never been so worried about myself (M 28 years old). I am a confident young professional and never thought I would be writing on a page like this. Anyway…I hope it gets better.
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