jackieb
- Date posted
- 5y
SimbadSimbad
- Date posted
- 5y
What might had helped me at the beginning of my OCD: - The family should learn about OCD, what is it and how can it be treated. This is really important. There are many resources on the internet about OCD, read something from experienced therapists. Why is learning so important for family members? Because people tend to use the wrong methods when trying to help people suffering from OCD. Education is really really important. - Find a good therapist. It might be necessary to go to multiple ones until you find one that is good. Go with your brother, ask the therapist about his methods and experiences with OCD. Do not choose one who is inexperienced with OCD. Find someone who knows how to do ERP. You are the objective person in this scenario. But it is important that your brother is comfortable with the therapist. The wrong therapist can worsen OCD (I have been there). - This brings me to my next point: There are so many therapy forms out there, and in my experience most of them are worsening OCD or just providing short term relief. A good therapist will use ERP and supplementive methods (journals or breathing techniques, etc.) to help with OCD. I have been to an alternative therapist before and he only tried to treat my OCD with experiencing my emotions. I will not say that it did not help a little bit, feeling your emotions and letting your body experience them can be helpful. But it did not help with the underlying issue of uncertainty and really doing ERP. - Your brother might wanna learn the basics of what OCD is and how it can be treated. This is important so to get some concept in your mind. But be aware if he starts to research really intensely, that can be avoidance or compulsion in itself. - Explain to him the basics about thoughts. Thoughts are not who we are, there are thousand thoughts coming and going, they never define us. - Start practicing mindfulness (you might start with him, because meditation is helpful for every person, there is only upside with meditation). In the beginning it is difficult, but your brother can experience the explanation from above during mediation. Thoughts are just thoughts, they are coming and going. But be aware that some people can feel intense distress during meditation if they have no guidance. It is a difficult topic and best to approach things with a therapist. Also I have recognised that during periods when I am really triggered meditation can become only rumination about all the thoughts. That is not the goal of mediation. It’s best to do this in a calm state and not when he is triggered or in an agitated state. Later on, with experience it might also be possible to calm yourself during triggering episodes. Be supportive and understanding, you don’t need to be able to imagine having OCD (it is really difficult to express what is going on during triggers). But be understanding that it is troubling him. Take him seriously and be there for him. I wish you and your brother all the best for dealing with OCD. Treatment is a wonderful thing and it is amazing that you are helping your brother. And of course don’t take everything I say for granted because I am not a therapist. Do some research and find a good therapist :)
Lark G.Lark G.
- Date posted
- 5y
This is great feedback. I have a question about your comments about erp. My issues are contamination around disgust. Not fear or germs or illness. I’m really struggling with Erp since it’s just proving to me that things are not dangerous but it’s not helping not be bothered by my big issue with disgust. Any thoughts? I find that erp works well for phobias or fears telling you what you fear won’t harm you. But it doesn’t tell you why you should not feel disgusted.
SimbadSimbad
- Date posted
- 5y
@Lark G. That would be a really good question for a therapist. I think that also disgust will fade through ERP, but I am no expert here. Do you have an example?
Lark G.Lark G.
- Date posted
- 5y
@Simbad Yes. They said erp should help but do far I failed at it. Example: I fear public bathroom blood and I keep seeing it. I know it won’t harm me but I’m extremely disgusted by it. So when I do Erp they make me understand that public bathrooms are not harmful and Nothing will happen if I don’t wash my hands which is fine but it doesn’t remove the fact that when they are often dirty I still feel overly grossed out and erp is not helping me feel less grossed out and less likely to do compulsions
Lark G.Lark G.
- Date posted
- 5y
@Lark G. I’ve been trying this since oct
ocdillustratedocdillustrated
- Date posted
- 5y
@Lark G. It's worth remembering that while it is nice if the disgust decreases, that isn't the ultimate target of therapy. Erp is about decreasing compulsions. The goal is to sever the connection between feeling and doing compulsions. In this case, that means feeling disgusted and acting like everyone else anyway
Lark G.Lark G.
- Date posted
- 5y
@NOCD Advocate - ocdillustrated Thanks! That makes sense. Everyone feels disgusted but the old me will wash once and the current me will wash 10x so then I need to go back to the 1x even wheb disgust is there. Is that what you mean?
ocdillustratedocdillustrated
- Date posted
- 5y
@Lark G. Yes!
jackiebjackieb
- Date posted
- 5y
Thank you so much for your advice. Right now we are in the process of finding my brother a therapist. Mindfulness is a great idea to do and right now my brother and our family are learning more about OCD. Thank you for taking the time to read my post and to answer it. I wish you the best of luck too! ☺️
Lark G.Lark G.
- Date posted
- 5y
I’ve been trying to recognize the ocd as ocd more. It’s hard when you are triggered but it can help
jackiebjackieb
- Date posted
- 5y
Thank you so much for your advice!
ocdillustratedocdillustrated
- Date posted
- 5y
Helpful articles https://iocdf.org/expert-opinions/family-issues/
jackiebjackieb
- Date posted
- 5y
Thank you so much for the links!
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- Date posted
- 25w
Coping techniques before i freak out?
Advice, coping techniques, just distraction needed. Yesterday night, my parents asked me if I could take care of my baby brother and I’ve been wanting to help them out so of course I said yes, and I was taking care of him with my other brother. A big fear of mine that I’ve told my therapist about is that my OCD will latch on to my new baby brother. It hasn’t happened since he has come home with us, but now I feel like something is brewing. My little brother is prone to throwing up so he already got the shirt He was wearing all dirty so I went to my mom‘s room and decided to change his onesie. I called my other brother for help by helping me sit him up while I put the shirt over his head after the shirt went over his head. My other brother was walking out and that’s when I clipped the buttons on the bottom of the onesie and continued to carry him around the house, but it’s that action that my mind is obsessing over. Me clipping the buttons of my baby brother’s onesie. I can’t get over it. My mind keeps replaying that one thing because my thoughts are saying “oh what if you accidentally inappropriately touched him “ and I even went out of my way to avoid touching his diaper because I knew my head would start spinning shit like this. But ever since last night, I can’t stop thinking if I accidentally traumatized my little brother some how. I know I didn’t do anything wrong. I’ve helped my mom change my brother‘s clothes before. My parents literally check his diaper if he soiled himself, but when I do anything that has to do with making sure my brother is clean and healthy my head tries to make me feel sick and crazy. The thoughts are getting worse and getting to the point where my head is trying to make me feel like I’m weird for wanting to change my brother out of his dirty clothes. I’m just so scared that these thoughts are gonna get worse and I’m trying not to freak out right now so I went for a walk outside. But im still getting such intense anxiety. I dont know how to cope or what to do advice coping techniques would be a such a help ive been doing so good with avoiding compulsions. I just need help to ground myself. I dont want to go to my mom with this ill feel worse. Is me writing this a compulsion?
Mum🌸
- Date posted
- 24w
Need advice how to help son with his religious OCD
My son has Pure O religious/scrupulosity with GAD and Bipolar. My son was diagnosed with Pure O religious OCD two years ago. He has to complete a task so that God doesn’t send him to hell if he doesn’t do it. These tasks are dangerous like doing multiple back flips on concrete, or jumping off balconies three times, doing MMA slams on his back three times. The thoughts are telling him if he doesn’t do this he will go to hell. Or he is so worried about blaspheming the holy spirt and loose his salvation. He knows this is his OCD. He knows the scripture and that God is one of peace and love. Been there and done that on quoting scripture and reminding him he is saved. I can see the torture he is going through and it is painful to watch. He also needs to be stuck next to me at all times cuz it makes him feel safe. This is impeding on my life as I feel I have a toddler again, he is 24 and a former 4 star football player. He wants this to stop, he is in therapy and working on it. He was free from these thoughts from November 2023 till April 2025. He is dealing with narcissistic trauma with his father and this triggers the OCD. My question is what can I do to support and help him through these episodes and not agitate him and to help him heal?
ConcernedSib...
- Date posted
- 20w
How to convince to start OCD therapy
I'm writing today as a concerned sibling. I respect you all for your hard work, sharing and the guidance everyone provides. I've been reading comments about how helpful OCD therapy is, but have yet to convince my sibling that it can help. They respond that they probably wont learn more than what they've already realized and that they can't actually stop the OCD behaviors for them.. I say that there are professionals with tips and would help to consult on ways to battle OCD. My sibling has realized that they cant give into the thoughts, but from that realization to action, is hard, as folks know. I've been taking note of people's reviews of getting better and plan to share those with my sibling, but does anyone else have other advice how to help them get more help? It seems the issue may be Contamination OCD and general (heavy) anxieties and depression (which has been around for most of their life). Thank you in advance for any more guidance.
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