- Username
- Terrie Browning
- User type
- Therapist
- Date posted
- 4y ago
You are welcome lulu23. Thank you for sharing! I talk to many clients that struggle with depersonalization and existential obsessive thoughts. Try to focus on them like you would any other obsessive thought. Question the uncertainty of these thoughts and do not move away from the thought until your anxiety has come down and you feel like you can move on. Then move on! Go do something you like, think about what you are grateful for. Challenge that negativity with positive thoughts. I know you can do this! ?
Wow. “They don’t feel like themselves anymore” really hit home
Me too ?
I hope it is helpful to know this is what your symptoms look like. This is not your true self, it is an OCD symptom. Remember who you are, remember what you like to do and who you want to be, that person is there under the uncertainty. Challenge that uncertainty...maybe or maybe not, could it be a symptom. Connect with the thoughts you want to have, the ones that are about the true you. I appreciate all your posts! Thank you for sharing. I hope each one of you ge to work with a trained ERP therapist and learn some great coping mechanisms for stopping this cycle.
But like what if I fall for one of these thoughts and do the harm action? I don’t know if my old self is there
The focus can be on the “what if” that’s the uncertainty mentioned above. Focus on the uncertainty instead of moving to the next behavior which is seeking reassurance, checking in with yourself. That’s what ERP is all about. I hope you are able to get into treatment with a trained ERP therapist who can help you stop these compulsions. Believe me, I understand how difficult it is to let go! Talking about sounds easy, but it is a challenge for sure. However, it works! Wishing you good luck ??
Thank you for this post. Ever since I went off my medication the wrong way (without tapering/doctor telling me it was ok) I have been going through derealization/depersonalization and it’s created so many existential and philosophical thoughts. It has gotten to the point where I can’t separate myself from them at all and I do feel like a different person. I can’t interact with people like I once used to, even my family. Im working hard on just living my life every day and posts like these help so thank you.
I have problems separating from my symptoms of OCD. When I wash my hands, I have to follow the feeling and it has to be of a certain way. If I don't follow the feelings, I might not be able to focus. That's what makes it hard for me to separate myself from my OCD symptoms.
Thank you for sharing Dahliah. Sometimes when you have an obsession like hand washing, your compulsion can be a physical action - like muscle tensing and letting go. Often it can be difficult to tell what the compulsion is because it follows the obsessive thought so closely. This is after some time of obsessing and compulsive. Try working on separating the obsessive thought from the following compulsion - that feeling you get follows something you are doing. Try to pay attention so you can stop yourself from doing that compulsion. It may feel uncomfortable at first to not have that comfortable feeling that allows you to stop washing your hands. This is what ERP is all about - exposure response prevention. Preventing the compulsion to stop the obsessing. Work with a trained ERP specialist to work consistently and you will see results. I wish you good luck in separating!
I’m struggling to “stay who I am” because I feel like I want these things. I feel like I lost my true self and truly want to do these harm thoughts.
I feel like I am losing myself everyday, and I am struggling to "stay who I am" because I want to be able to reach my dreams as a dancer. I have to do my compulsions so I will be able to stay who I am
@Dahliah It sucks but I think the true self is still in us
Right now i have fear of fainting, which makes me rethink in i should go out and play. But i still play. How do i get rid of fear of fainting
OCD is "ego-dystonic", which means the behaviors (thoughts) are inconsistent with one's fundamental beliefs and values. I think of it as "the mind isn't matching the soul" - which creates the high distress you experience when the thoughts occur. Because they do not match your beliefs. You are so much more than your thoughts!
Hey everyone. This is my first post here and it’s probably going to be a long one because I guess I feel comfortable enough to be open here. I need help. When I first got diagnosed with OCD, I figured it only impacted a small part of my life. I thought I was only affected with compulsions and obsessions that dealt with contamination, tangible perfectionism and the obvious intrusive thoughts and that’s it. Well, I’ve come to realize that most of my thinking has been impacted by OCD. At this point the only way to describe how it feels to me is a forest of thorny vines growing in place of my mind or maybe through and around my brain constantly growing every-time I give into this type of thinking (which is basically all the time because I wasn’t aware this was OCD). I’ve definitely felt it more recently, but I know it’s always been there from what I recall from past memories. I got diagnosed not so long ago with OCD and I was happy to because it explained this thing I knew was wrong with me but I didn’t know how much it will and has impacted me in the past. So, I think I’ve created a matrix in my mind or strengthened the OCD thought patterns because now I feel like my OCD impacts everything I do. And I guess I’m saying I need help here because maybe you guys will be able to see it, maybe validate me and point me where I can get help. I’ve been telling the people around me, I think my thinking is disordered and I need help but I don’t think they really understand the amount it’s affecting me or grasp what I meant when I say “I Need Help”. I did have a therapist before but because of a insurance change, she can’t work with me anymore and I’m not sure when I’ll get another (just to clarify). Back to the matter, the past couple of months I’ve been in my head just thinking and thinking. About everything. To the point where my head starts to hurt or until I feel sick of thinking about it but I can’t. I find that’s my obsessions and compulsions (other than the need for order [which can also be mental]) are very mentally based and I find myself ashamed of them so I hide them so maybe that’s why the people around me don’t feel my need for getting help as much as I do. Anyways, examples of this have been, -constantly thinking about what’s the purpose of all of life and the hidden messages in life -feeling like if I don’t do everything perfectly then what the point or being very mad at myself -being obsessed with how I present to the rest of the world sometimes even in close relationships -having calculated movements and actions (having to move my body a certain way or it doesn’t feel right) -obsessing over an absolute truth -questioning friendships and other relationships - obsessing over achievements or failures -obsessing over people -obsessing over decisions and outcomes because I want to make the perfect decisions I could go on and on but basically it’s just a lot of thinking and ruminating and obsessing to the point where people tell me I look like I’m some where else all the time. And I’ve started to feel like I find comfort in it now. I’m also diagnosed with depression and anxiety and I feel like it’s all just OCD. And same goes for my dissociation. I feel like they all root from my OCD. I’m so tired of feeling like this all the time and without my therapist I feel like I’m stuck here. I can’t make decisions, I’m never present, I can’t make or keep friendships/ relationships, everything impacts me deeply because I create a emotional obsession to it, I can’t just be without questioning everything and I’m constantly in my head. I’ve also started getting high all the time because I feel like it’s the only way to escape my brain but I’ve felt like it’s getting out of hand. I’m starting to lose in any type of hope of getting better. Does anyone have an advice for working on OCD by yourself or identifying when it’s OCD (especially mental obsessions and compulsions) so I can start to chip at this boulder that’s weighing down my life and energy?
Hi, I'm writing this just to see if someone else can relate. I've always been very confused by the difference between regular therapy and ocd therapy. What I mean is that, at least in my limited experience, regular therapy involved examining your feelings and thoughts (why you had them) and I was told that you can only process something by getting to the root of it. However, since I developed ocd and was diagnosed with it, therapy has been about tolerating anxiety, guilt, fear, sadness, etc., while forcing myself to not analyse the thoughts and feelings that I have. I feel very weird about this. It's like I went from "everything you think and feel has a reason (i am not talking here about fleeting thoughts and emotions, I am talking about recurrent and persistent ones) to "whatever feeling or thought you are having is not who you are and you should just observe it and not get involved with it". Am I the only one who is so confused by this? Also, if I am not my thoughts, and I am not my feelings, and I am not my sensations, who am I then? I mean, what is supposed to define me? I know some people say "your values" in response to this, but values are thoughts as well, and they can change over time, so, I don't think that this makes anything any clearer. Others say that it is our actions that define us. I can agree with that, but aren't our actions based on our thoughts and feelings? Anyway, I am not saying that therapy for ocd is ineffective, I am actually finding it very helpful, however I am still very confused about many aspects of it. I hoped that some of you could help me understand it better. Thanks. I wish you all a good day.
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