Be honest even if it’s harsh - do you think it’s possible to be in a romantic relationship with high functioning OCD? I just started therapy, my OCD is on the severe spectrum. I usually do mental compulsions, some physical. The thing is, I started talking to guys online for shits and giggles, see what’s out there without any real intentions to do anything. I didn’t think it would be a good idea from the get go considering somebody could capture my attention and I’d want to start seeing them. Well my assumption was correct and this did happen. Nothing’s been arranged yet, but I really want to get to know him more and possibly go on some dates. He’s hinted at meeting up, and I get this is part of what you do with online dating, but I can’t help but feel pressured into it because I have a lot going on. I don’t know if it’s a good idea with all this anxiety in my life. I considered two things: as much as my thoughts terrify me, am I letting my anxiety get to me and putting my life on hold by not going out? Because if I cut dating out of my life out, I may as well stop going to university, not interact with people, or have friends. It’s not like it makes a whole lot of a difference considering I still have to do these other things anyway, right? Or, am I being reasonable in thinking that relationships in and of themselves are difficult enough and I’m doing myself a favour by “focusing on myself” by taking this year to devote my time and energy to therapy instead? Can’t I do both? You may think this is for me to decide, but I really think I could benefit from receiving outside guidance from people who are more experienced in this area. I’ve never had a boyfriend before and I don’t know how this stuff works. Sorry if this post is long, I didn’t think I’d suddenly have a lot to say on the matter. Thoughts?

Carl Cornett

Date posted: 5y

I’ve been married and dated multiple times. No reason OCD has to limit that.

???

Date posted: 5y

Just try to have fun and if it goes well, just take things slow and know you should prioritize yourself over anybody else right now. Being social and having distractions can also be very positive for your mood so you’re not overthinking things either. but also much of online dating is one bad date in real life so you never know. Just keep expectations low ;)

Evelyn4416

Date posted: 5y

I’ve had these exact thoughts as well. Part of me would really like to start dating someone but I feel like I should wait until I’m “better” until actually pursue anything. Like I don’t want to a screw anything up if the OCD gets really bad or something down the road. But I agree at the same time I also have friends I go out with and do things with frequently and even on my own I like to go out and have fun, so shouldn’t dating be okay too? I say go for it and give it a shot but if you start getting more anxious or worse for any reason you should amp up your self care. Put yourself first to ensure you’re not overworking yourself and keep in check how you are feeling/doing throughout it. Good luck :)

Sunrise22

Date posted: 5y

This is only something you can determine: will dating help you expose yourself to fears or will it distract you (in a negative way) from working on your OCD symptoms.

Sunrise22

Date posted: 5y

Keep in mind that dating could help in your recovery if your partner is supportive, but inherent to dating is additional stress so this may exacerbate your OCD

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