Really disappointed in myself this morning. After about a week of not giving into any compulsions, I caved and went down a rabbit hole. Didn’t make me feel any better (of course). A little background, I have this “irrational” fear of getting in trouble with the law (even though I have never purposely committed a serious crime in my life). It partially stems from a real event, but certainly not all of it. I ruminate over things for hours and hours a day which is kind of a compulsion in itself. However my really bad compulsion is reading/checking crime reports, and reading peoples stories who have been in trouble. It never does me any good, and always makes me feel awful. Sorry for the rant, just a little bummed this morning, but I’ll get through it. Good luck to everyone on their journey today!

I appreciate the words of encouragement. This helps! Thanks!

Well unfortunately, I was quite hungover this morning. I know that sounds terrible, but it’s the truth. Not sure if that played a part or not.

Thanks for the support!

@Nick21 Of course!

You sound pretty frustrated with yourself at the moment

@NOCD Advocate - Katie Yeah i amsOmething so simple is becoming so complicated

@wickyicky The first times we face our fears are often the hardest because we haven't built up confidence that we can handle distress. What are the barriers that are getting in your way at the moment?

@NOCD Advocate - Katie I cant handle the anxiety after not following rutuals

@wickyicky Maybe we can think of a way to start with smaller tasks

@NOCD Advocate - Katie I dont have big and small tasks. I just have a washing problem. I cant seem to remove my hands from under the tap

@wickyicky Stopping a ritual once it's started is often harder than not starting it altogether. Maybe you can look at exposure as a process of expanding the list of objects you can touch without washing at all

@NOCD Advocate - Katie No this washing is for when my need to be washed. Like for instance i have to wash my hands after using the restroom. I cant go around like that so . In cases where my hands need to be washed is wherr ocd spikes

@wickyicky You actually don't need to wash after using the bathroom. A normal part of treatment for contamination OCD is eliminating handwashed altogether for a while

@NOCD Advocate - Katie Yeah i get u . I can do that . Thats not an issue. Im speaking about a specific case in which i have to wash my hands . Like because i have to for some reason or the other. I have no choice. Washing my hands is not a compulsion . The compulsion is removing my hands . <There maybe mandatory reasons for washing hands i.e. religious obligation etc..