- Username
- Xxmariaxx
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Keep up the great work! Make a new post about it, you seem like you're making good progress there
How can we help make your life more positive?
That’s meant to say six weeks not swim week
Just knowing that you have taken the time to read and care is lovely! Thankyou! Some times just takes someone to say yeah! I get you! Xx other than that I don’t know how to start! Xx
I think we’ve all been exactly where you are right now. OCD can be so Isolating, huh? It sounds like you’re in therapy, which is great. Is it OCD-related therapy, or just talk therapy? I’m sure your children appreciate you smiling and keeping a brave face on for them, but don’t think you have to keep that up. My mom went through some pretty dark depression when I was a kid. I like to think I would have been open to her saying, “Mom’s not doing so good today, kiddo. Can I get a hug?”
At night it is the worst for me because I’m relaxing and my brain thus has time to race and race and race and thought start piling up. It gets tiring to say the least. Try to stay strong. I know it’s hard. I’m actually having a very bad morning myself but am trying to get thru it. It’s an every day battle but trying to remain positive and going to therapy is so helpful. I look forward to therapy actually. Good luck!
How did the rest of the day go for you yesterday? I know how you feel. I’m sure many of us in the group know how you feel
Thanks everyone! And yesterday was tiring! Today was tiring, I tried reaching out to few people but they were busy! Then I had a mm ocd feeling that this being an open group and what if my partner is secretly on it and reading my posts or whatever! Things I can’t share with him! I know it’s insane but that how I over analyse stuff! Kids at their dads so just me, just sat in silence for a king while contemplating things! Tried to explain to my partner a little in the respect of I don’t know when I will feel better and can see him, he asks which is sweet but I take it as pressure and found myself telling him that I have so much going on, even if I snap out of it we still might not be ok as am dealing with relationship issues too! I just felt I had to be honest but was like he can’t process it and I’ll get better and we will be happy again! House is very quiet and with all recent burglaries in my area I feel a little anxious! So checking more! Decided to take up exercise ?? been eating pretty good and I hope it will give me a distraction! How is everyone today!! Thanks for your responses and for caring xxxx
That’s great you are exercising and eating healthier! I’m doing ok today.. been a tiring day but settling down now. You should post more in new threads too, you seem to have a lot of OCD information and knowledge!
Thankyou.. I have studied quite a bit on it in my need to understand more.. psychiatrist even said am very well informed, although sometimes knowing the logic behind something doesn’t make it any easier to battle but just understand what’s happening to you! If I can help others I will! Also done panic course to understand and help with that so guess could help with techniques for people to help with that! Ended my relationship today... after much deliberation, it does not feel Good now but for the best in future! Sad times but a decision none the less! Now to try move forward! Hurting someone’s feelings is not in my nature so I feel pretty crumby! But better now that further down the line! Just hope I keep the faith in the decision I took so long to reach and the pesky repetitive demons keep away for now! How are you?! Xxx
I had to stay home from work today because even though I was exhausted I got 1 hour of sleep. I work 7 days a week between 2 jobs and I finally said today I need a mental day. I am lonelier than ever and have lost friends over the past few years or just lost touch. My best friend ever stopped speaking with me after a group tour of the UK a few years ago and now someone that was our mutual friend is best friends with her and brushes me off. I tried to reach out to my ex friend and make peace but no answer. She has many friends now and a boyfriend. I realize I had some drunk nights that make people not want to hang out with me but I was up last night feeling complete rejection to the fullest and horrible about myself. At rock bottom I have no one. On top of that I was just in a toxic relationship while living abroad and he turned out to be a chronic cheater and married with 2 kids. I have one friend who speaks to me from LA from time to time but as for here in New York I barely got anyone left and bad memories. I can’t be afraid of not going to sleep every night because of thoughts or depression. My period is due any day which doesn’t help. I was just crying so much last night. I’ve never felt so alone. I just feel like a horrible human being that no one wants to be around and I try to make it right.
I’m laying I bed crying my eyes out don’t really know why, I’m just so so tired of overthinking 24/7. I think it’s got to a point where it’s overwhelming and I feel alone. I feel like people around me don’t understand, I mean they try, but they don’t really understand… I’ve had ocd since I was very young and I’m 26 now and trying to deal with it, it’s getting worse day after day. I don’t know what to do anymore I’m just writing what I’m thinking right now, sorry about that, I think it’s actually calming me down I have like thoughts about my relationship, I want everything to be absolutely perfect all the time, my boyfriend knows about my ocd but doesn’t understand I don’t like to talk about it to him because I’m scared it will push him away He’s going to come home soon and being like « hi I’m crying I don’t know why » I don’t want him to think that I’m just negative
I feel so hopeless and alone right now. Even seeking therapy seems like a waste of time for me. Im just so tired of battling with my mind everyday and having not much of a support system. I just want to stay in bed and not do anything because even getting through the day feels so hard sometimes.
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