Please don't report me just listen. Today by far has been the worst day of ocd in a long, long time. I'm literally losing it and spiraling so hard. I don't want to do it to my family because I couldn't do that to them. But I literally want to die. I truly do I'm trying my hardest to hold on and hope for a silver lining but the only option that even makes me remotely happy is going to sleep and hoping I don't wake up. I want to scream and cry yet all i can do is stay in silence praying for a reprieve or something. It feels so much like I'm bisexual like all the feelings, thoughts, etc. Feel like me like this is who I am it feels like there is no separation no hope. I'm tired and help doesn't look like it is likely as no one will call me back and I need help desperately. I don't want to talk to my Mom as she is so worried about money, food, her job, etc. And i have absolutely zero friends and no one to talk too. I have anxiety attacks almost daily I'm suffering yet my brain still tells me I dont have it bad enough to even complain and that im faking I'm sorry if I'm annoying I know I have been posting a lot and I'm sorry if I'm triggering anybody I so badly want help and to get better I really do but I've literally never felt like this much shit before like I don't know what has happened in these past few days but I feel worthless and disgusting and I hate myself

Thank you guys so much for responding. It truly makes me feel better when people listen to me. I hope you all are doing well.

Hey Lina, so sorry to hear that you are suffering so much and I hope you get that phone call to get the help you need, I just want to say I have been there a few times and sometimes it took me to get to rock bottom to pick my self up again, stay strong. You are definitely not alone, everyone on here is here to support you.

Nonono your suffering is not an inconvenience to other people, you're not a problem. You're clearly going through a lot, that doesn't make you a bad person :(

You are an incredible creation of God. He doesn't make junk, sweetie!

Please know you are NOT alone. I have some things I hope can help bring a new perspective to you. https://www.instagram.com/p/B96s9BXHaIa/?igshid=1e8trofkavq69 https://www.instagram.com/p/B9boDohpCvw/?igshid=d3e0qng4ebqt https://www.instagram.com/p/B9-0bmYHRB2/?igshid=1difoemmr9yn https://www.instagram.com/p/B93JXRKHDkN/?igshid=7rjp7v3e0bb4

Hey! You can release your feelings out here. Feel free to share your pain. I'm listening.

You’re not worthless or disgusting. You deserve love, a lot of it, from others and yourself. I get it. You feel trapped and as though it’ll never ever get better. And maybe my words have no hardcore evidence, but I can promise you it won’t be like this forever. Doing it isn’t your only option. I know in the midst of fear it’s hard to see clearly. Everything is so strong and scary and REAL. But these things die down through time. You’re afraid of not being yourself. And it’s not uncommon to run into fears like these. They’re full of uncertainties and cracking them is what the brain craves. So don’t! Don’t do it. Don’t reassure yourself, do check online, don’t ask around. Don’t do it. Just let it be. Your suffering is valid. Don’t think that you ‘don’t have it bad enough’. I hope you feel better Lina. And if you like, I’ll be your friend. I’m here for you in this low time ?