TERRIFIED of trying meds. But I also wonder if I’m missing out on a chance at a better life.

That’s so good to hear. I’ve been off meds (I was on buspirone) since November and there’s definitely moments here and there where I think I could really benefit from starting either Zoloft or Lexapro but I was afraid it would make everything worse or give you horrible side effects (we all hear these on commercials). Can I ask your experience with Zoloft, like why did you decide to start taking them, how much have they helped you, etc.?

It does feel like SUCH a big deal to me! It feels like it will totally alter who I am and I think that’s what scares me. But at the end of the day, I’m not who I am anymore reguardless because ocd has taken that. I started meds about two years ago for three days and I was in such a bad place. I wonder if it was because of the meds but I know in my heart that it wasn’t. Because I was feeling crappy before them. But now I associate the meds with those terrible times. It is very refreshing to hear someone with a good experience with them. I’m so so glad they have helped you. Because I know the ocd pain and it’s terrible.

I fear the very worst side affects. (Psychosis, suicide, homicidal thoughts) But I think it’s time to bite the bullet. I need something to help!

@ruminating_redhead Wish you the luck, the obsessive thoughts can be debilitating. I go thru a lot of the same thoughts and I feel that there’s no shame in trying meds. They’re there for a reason!

@ruminating_redhead That’s exactly what I fear too, have those type of thoughts pop up. I already deal with suicidal OCD though but I don’t actually want to have the legit thoughts instead of the intrusive ones

@ruminating_redhead My psychiatrist said the risk of homicidal thoughts only is significant if you’re below 24 years old and dealing with such a deep depression that your brain is almost in an inactive state, so when the drug starts to activate those unused receptors you start thinking again and being creative, and this thinking is filled with suicidal ideation. It’s like a light switch that turns on your cognitive processing, but that thinking is still filled with depressive thoughts. Idk if that makes sense and I’m no doctor so take what I’m saying with a grain of salt

@evkrey It makes sense. Almost like an “in between” state. The last time I started an SSRI I felt really aggressive and almost violent and that’s what scares me. But I want in a deep depression.... I don’t think

@ruminating_redhead Oh jeez that sounds scary too

@ruminating_redhead Regardless it’s super rare so I wouldn’t worry about it. You can always switch drugs

I want to be able to think clearer so I can better understand my therapy. It feels as though my ocd isn’t allowing it. How are you feeling on them?

Since my ocd has begun, I’ve had the hardest time thinking clearly. Because my brain is so bogged down with this thoughts that I’m trying to ‘resolve’ it doesn’t allow for much more thinking than that.

Thank you for your comment. I also suffer from panic disorder and depression. I feel like I almost need them to help in the therapy prices because I simply can’t concentrate in my sessions with my ocd wall in the way!

@ruminating_redhead Yes the meds will help then. It’s a guessing game though as the first meds you try may not work so you have to keep guessing which ones will work for you. But Zoloft takes care of OCD, Panic disorder, social anxiety, etc. kind of like an all in one drug. I use the word “take care” in the general sense, as the drug is no cure, just creates a baseline for anxiety that will prevent you from falling into depression or full blown panic so that it’s manageable

There is no need to be afraid. Sure getting used to medication will take sometime but its nothing compared to the pain of OCD. So take the medication and relax it will get much easier soon trust me.

Xanax scares me too. I cannot lie. But all meds do I guess. I remember I took one Xanax years ago and it settled me. I was on days of panic attacks and not being able to eat. I took one and I literally ate 4 egg rolls and two burritos in one sitting haha. Did they prescribe and SSRI along with it?

@NotDepressed This is a great way to put it. Ocd in itself is painful and robbing of.. well, yourself in general. What could possibly be worse than that?