Is it a symptom of ocd that I am rigid as far as morals are concerned and I find it extremely difficult to understand,accept and love unconditionally someone when they have committed immoral acts and have not regretted it, instead they say they did nothing wrong?I find myself often thinking about morals and immorality and it is really difficult for me to forgive and love when someone has not repented.Is it a symptom of ocd ?

Just as some proof that opinions are extremely varied btw: take ma's examples above. Regret is not black and white. If someone had killed someone else and had zero regret that it happened at all, I'd keep myself away from them. I wouldn't understand them. I could love them unconditionally and still have boundaries of not being around them because their behaviour and thoughts on it is an indicator that they might not hesitate to do it again. I wouldn't think I'm better than them in some moral or abstract way, I'd probably think they need professional mental help. Sociopaths almost always have violent backgrounds full of abuse. Why would I get to judge them morally without knowing their life? If they had some regret, like regret it had to happen and feel guilt but the reality of the situation was that it was in a warzone or self defense or to save their own life, I wouldn't hold that against them. People in those situations who torture themselves with guilt about it often end up wishing they hadn't done it because their life is hell now. I'd prefer not to add to the weight of their pain. Judging them helps nobody, not the dead person, not them, not their family etc. I'd have to be seriously arrogant to judge those without regret by thinking that I would've chosen self sacrifice instead. It's not my place. Moral pride is total foolishness. As for the candy example: someone might point out how capitalism is a horrific system which results in enslaved children in China jumping out of iPhone factory windows, and therefore feel that any act which causes issues for that economic system, including theft, is a brave act of defiance. So long as that's their real reason for stealing the candy, seems like they have a point. They have a perspective. I don't have to agree based on the things I know. Reality is I don't know everything. Neither does the candy-thief. Nobody has all the answers, we just do our best. If you want to look at morals, you need to look at things like personal accountability/integrity, compassion, humility and conscientiousness. Those are measures of moral fabric. Not opinions and perspectives. And where someone doesn't embody those *actual* moral virtues I described, it's because their life circumstances haven't nurtured those qualities in that person. Personally, I think you probably lack humility somewhat, just like I lack conscientiousness. I'm not judging you for it, because I don't need you to be perfect or to function in my life by feeling better or above other people. There are reasons behind the person you are, just like there are reasons why I am who I am. As the French say, to understand is to forgive. And if I would forgive if I understood, then my own current ignorance isn't a good excuse to judge in the meanwhile. Nobody is immoral. Everybody is doing their best.

I’m not so sure if that is necessarily OCD because I think most people would find it hard to love someone unconditionally if they did something wrong and wouldn’t admit to it or repent. The only exception to that rule might be a parent and his/her child. But if it’s like a requirement you have thar ppl must repent in a certain way to like them that sounds a little ritualistic and could be OCD but I couldn’t say so for sure. I know that I personally think about morality in terms of my own actions and behaviors and I often feel shame or guilt when I act in a way that is not in accordance with personally established morals.

Either it’s a symptom of your OCD or you are simply bothered by people who don’t meet your own personal moral standards (I.e. they don’t have to hurt you personally). I’m not sure that’s necessarily a bad thing though. I mean if someone walked up to me and said they murdered someone but told me that their action was justified, I’d probably hear their story but more likely than not, I’m not going to want to be around someone who killed another person and thinks that it was the right thing to do. So no, I don’t think this behavior is a bad thing because it helps you ween out those who might be insensitive and not take care of you properly, but you shouldn’t take it to the extreme either. Like if you’re dating someone who tells you they stole a candy bar from a convenience store when they were 8 years old and they say that they felt justified of stealing it at that time, that’s probably something you can let slide. But if it’s something serious like my previous example, then your behavior is justified. So anyway, YES I do think this could be OCD, but as long as you don’t take it to the extreme, this might not be a bad thing. I really hope I’m answering your question and not making things worse. Sorry if I am.

Hmm, interesting question. You deserve to have boundaries and standards for others who are in your life. But there is probably some black and white thinking here, which can be a symptom of a few things including OCD, Asperger's syndrome and borderline personality disorder. But it can also be as simple as having grown up around judgmental people who blame others, project shame, refuse to acknowledge harm they have done to others or insist that they don't make mistakes. Or it could just be that the idea of not having moral certainty makes you anxious, because it means there are grey areas in the world. In truth, people absolutely make mistakes, but what constitutes a mistake is extremely up for debate- there are as many different opinions on that as there are people. Your moral opinions are based on your own culture, upbringing, knowledge and possibly religion. It is EXTREMELY contextual. Other people would certainly judge things you have done and don't feel sorry for as immoral. You may have a strong sense of justice, which is fine, but there are grey areas. But let's talk about what loving unconditionally means. It doesn't mean keeping someone in your life. It doesn't mean continuing to do things you do for them. It doesn't mean agreeing with them or changing your own morals. It doesn't mean not setting boundaries. Unconditional love can be done up close or from far away. You can set boundaries or not be around them and still love them. Everybody is flawed including you, and everyone is worthy of love regardless including you. What you feel is right and wrong differs from everyone else on the planet in at least some ways. What's important to me is that when someone themself feels they've done something wrong, they aren't in their ego and are capable of apologising and putting things right, and without having to be told to. That's integrity and it's important. But you can't try to hold the rest of the world to your personal ideas of what they should and shouldn't do. Grey areas. You do need to get a handle on this in order to be able to function in a relationship btw- otherwise you could become quite a rigid nag-monster, and leave others with unwarrantes feelings of inadequacy and shame. It's not your job to judge people. Humility and compassion are key. You don't have to agree with others in order to love or tolerate them.