Currently worried that I purposefully put cups of laundry detergent over my dried clothes. I really don't know if I did or not. My anxiety is super high right now. I really want to go back and rinse them, but I'm trying not to. It's been a few hours though and my anxiety is staying at a 8/10. This really sucks. My body is super stressed out.

Ibg

Date posted: 5y

First, don’t rinse them. Sit with the uncertainty. This is an opportunity to get better. So embrace the anxiety. It definitely sucks! But we gotta just sit it with it, b/c we CAN handle it.

canigetawitness

Date posted: 5y

Thanks I'm trying. Where it's really got me this time is I had to make two trips from the dryer to bring them to my bedroom. On the second trip my mind went "Ok, this time you're not going to put detergent on them" and then I thought "Oh, crap! So the first time I did? I don't know, did I?" And yeah, now I'm trying to just sit with it, but I'm also worried simultaneously. I'll try to resist my compulsion to go back and rinse though.

Ibg

Date posted: 5y

OCD is an expert genius at getting us to wrapped up in content and trying to “figure things out”. The trick is to disengage with that content. And of course, don’t respond with compulsions.

Ibg

Date posted: 5y

Also, try using the SOS feature to really lean into the scary thoughts and feelings. I use this compulsion message in SOS “Sitting with and accepting this distress is going to make me stronger.”

canigetawitness

Date posted: 5y

I'll try that! Thanks.

Crazy.Cat.Lady

Date posted: 5y

I struggle with this except I get anxious when I throw out things. Like did I purposely put something important/valuable in things that I need to throw out, like an empty yogurt cup. Yes empty yogurt cup.

canigetawitness

Date posted: 5y

That sounds similar. Sorry you experience that.

Fathomable

Date posted: 5y

I've been wondering whether there are some other methods which might be able to help you to develop more trust in your memory and that if you did your fears then you'd notice at the time and not immediately forget. I'm gonna look into it.

canigetawitness

Date posted: 5y

Oh, id be interested to know. Thank you. Yeah, it's almost like there's blip in time & then I can't recall whether or not I've done something. It's awful, but I guess that's OCD. Doubt, not knowing, did I do that? I don't know. I seriously don't know.

Ibg

Date posted: 5y

Yeah... I’ve been there 40,000 times or so. False memories, or not being sure if I didn’t something, or someone said something, etc. I think the best thing is to accept that your worst fear may be true. But, you’ll never know, or if someday you do know you’ll deal with it then. Trust me, I’ve accepted some of the worst things imaginable - it is possible. Eventually you see that either you were irrational b/c of OCD, or drastically overestimating risk, etc. In other words, the mental “cobwebs” WILL clear but it definitely takes time (either a couple hours, days, or weeks - everyone is different). Give it a shot.

canigetawitness

Date posted: 5y

I'm really thinking I put extra detergent on my clothes. The anxiety isn't lessening. I feel like I really need to go back and rinse or else I'll have trouble sleeping tonight ?. I don't want to go back and rinse of course. I've already folded my clothes, but if they actually have excess detergent, id want to go back and rinse them.

Crazy.Cat.Lady

Date posted: 5y

I know it's difficult but you can do this. If you absolutely have to try waiting another hour and ask if you can wait another hour. If the answer is no maybe rinse a few items not all. It's okay if you have to. Proud you were able to hold off.

Crazy.Cat.Lady

Date posted: 5y

Can you do something else this hour until you ask yourself the question? Maybe do a little exercise to exhaust yourself?

canigetawitness

Date posted: 5y

@Crazy.Cat.Lady Thanks, I'm trying to hold off. I've been playing a game on my phone, watching television, been outside in the sun some. Just trying to cope.

Crazy.Cat.Lady

Date posted: 5y

@canigetawitness Awesome! You're doing great!! Whatever you do don't think about a pink elephant dancing on a big Apple pie. Lol

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