How can I help people on this app and write helpful posts without reassuring them? I always feel that I reassure people by accident and actually end up obviously harming instead of helping. :( some of you guys on here are such good advice givers, I want to be aswell.

You were a good advice giver for me here :)

Here's a copy and paste of an old thread onthe topic. Unfortunately I can't add the picture. Often people make posts when they're really distressed. That's understandable. Figuring out how to be helpful without giving reassurance can be tricky. Try these skills: The first four are great for when someone is still highly emotional. One tip is to keep your responses short and sweet. When emotions are strong, language processing and reasoning is reduced. HEAR THEM OUT. Don't agree or disagree with what the person says. Just restate what they said in your own words to show you're listening. You can ask neutral questions for more information. Some examples are "tell me more about what happened before" "I hear you saying that you don't feel like you can handle this" "first x happened, then you did y. Next z occurred" EXTERNALIZE THE PROBLEM. Make OCD separate from the person. Imagine what OCD says and does. This sounds like "OCD is saying you're a danger to your kids" "even though you washed your hands for twenty seconds, OCD demanded that you wash for longer" "OCD is telling you that you should avoid reading your emails" LABEL EMOTIONS. It's really validating for someone when their feeling is acknowledged with a name. Try saying "you sound fed up" "I can hear the desperation in your words" "maybe you're feeling disappointed". PRAISE THE POSITIVE. Don't invent something positive that didn't happen, but recognize every little good thing the person did. Here's a few ideas. "You did you best to solve the problem. It's too bad it didn't work". "You wrote a word you're scared of" "nice job reaching out for support" Once the person is calmer, the next three strategies are relevant. FIND RESOURCES. This is pretty self explanatory. Articles, videos, podcasts, etc are all good options. USE YOUR OWN LIFE. As a community, we have a wealth of lived experience to draw from. Try comments like "my therapist suggested doing x when I'm anxious" "do you want to hear about a time I was able to laugh at my OCD?" "I remember when.... What helped me was...." LOOK TO THE FUTURE. We need to plan for the difficult emotions before they happen. Some of the following questions can redirect the conversation to future strategies. "What can you learn from this?" "How could you respond differently next time?" "Where could you put a reminder of your coping skills?" "Who can you lean in for support if this happens again?" A big thank you to anyone who read this all the way to the end! You're superstars!

You try your best to understand people with your own problems. Sometimes your presence is all that support needed. :-)