Does anyone else get tired from other people's problems? I'm just so exhausted having to talk people down from suicide, or comfort them about shit situations. I probably sound like a bad person because of this, but in very empathetic. It affects my mood and makes me upset and suicidal, too. But I cant just tell someone to fuck off, or go to someone else. That's mean. I want to be there for people but I cant handle it. Idk what to do.

Definitely practice creating some boundaries! If you aren’t feeling well enough to talk about deep things then gently let them know and they should respect that.

You can’t be there for everyone. You’re only one person. Sometimes being selfish is a good thing. Put yourself first.

Set better boundaries. A lot of people who fail to set boundaries in this way just end up stewing resentment and feeling like other people are victimising them. People can't read your mind. You need to assert yourself so that people can know what you want. You can tell people you're busy, you're already overwhelmed, you're struggling, you can't do the things they're asking etc. You can say those things nicely but firmly. If they're offended by it then they're not the sort of person you want around, they're inconsiderate/entitled takers. If they're sensitive enough to be upset or angered by you kindly saying no, then ok but it still doesn't give them license to be rude to you or make threats or guilt trip you or blame their emotional state on you. If they make a mistake in how they respond and don't apologise later when they feel better, you should stay away from them. The truth is that people who themselves have good boundaries react appropriately to people saying no to them: they accept it gracefully and don't hold a grudge. People constantly in shit situations or contemplating suicide often don't have great boundaries, so whilst I'm not surprised that the thought of asserting yourself makes you nervous, I also think it's worth considering what, if anything, you actually get out of those relationships. Are they supportive of you? Do they listen compassionately and give you their full attention and effort, or do they just bring up their life issues all the time? Is it actually making your life better or worse to have them in your life? Asserting boundaries isn't mean. Saying you can't do whatever they want right now isn't the same as saying you don't care about them or doing something bad to them or abandoning them. It's not fair on you to be in the position in the first place of being somebody's only support, that's an unreasonable amount of pressure and responsibility and you have every right to bring up the fact that while you do care about being there for them, they need to work to widen their own support circle of they want to keep being able to rely on you, because you're not a wizard. You have an aversion to causing negative feelings in other people, it makes you feel guilty and selfish and like you've done something wrong, and probably pretty adrenalised. It's codependency which stems from your experiences with your parents, from them reacting badly when you asserted yourself. It would help to do some assertiveness online workshops and practice it. You probably usually see it as other people's emotional needs being more important than your 'wants' to not have to comfort yet another person, yet again. Look, it's fine to value being there for other people (although I recommend it not be the only place you draw self esteem from), but there's empathy and then there's being a doormat. Healthy empathy sets healthy boundaries. It may feel like your choice is between "doormat" and "mean", but there is a middle ground which may make you feel mean sometimes (until you get more used to it), where you say to people "I'd like to, but I'm not going to be able to at the moment. Perhaps on X day/perhaps you can speak to X/perhaps calling a hotline with professionals could help you feel better, etc". You don't owe anyone a reason or an excuse for ever saying no. You say no, kindly but firmly, without blaming or criticising them and *without overapologising*, and follow through on the no. It's also perfectly possible that you have a tendency to put yourself into the situations where people lean on you this way by actively offering yourself as a shoulder to cry on. You say you want to be there for people, that's great. I assure you that a regular healthy friendship involves plenty of being there for eachother without there being any need for you to go out of your way to find and rescue metaphorical injured puppies. If you really want to change this situation, you're going to need to do a pretty big overhaul of some of your habitual behaviours.