My OCD tends to come in waves. For the last few weeks, I was fine, on top of the world, happy, but lately I’ve been feeling completely defeated by my intrusive thoughts, which really sucks because I JUST got over my theme of my loved ones dying if I didn’t do things repetitively. Not sure if anyone has any advice on how to handle these thoughts, but if you do, PLEASE let me know, I feel so empty because of them. It started with a major existential crisis, which led me down a path of discovering my spiritual beliefs (after discovering them, I felt happy, joyful, at peace with nature, all other souls, and the universe). Starting yesterday, though, I’ve been getting this intrusive thought saying that no one else in this world is real, and is a “fake” person, animal, etc. created by angels to test whether I’ve become the best version of myself I can become, meaning that everyone I love is fake. I know in my heart that this is false, that it makes no sense (especially because I don’t even believe in angels or a traditional god [more of the Hindu idea of universal oneness, or pantheism], meaning this is in direct conflict with my own beliefs). When I try and argue or disprove these thoughts, my arguments make sense, but the intrusive thoughts argue back- for example, if I think no, that’s not true, and list a reason why it makes no sense, the thought will counter, and tell me that if I seek help, it’ll just be people who are “in on it” trying to push me back into the illusion. This thought in particular is just so vicious in that no matter what I tell it, it tries to convince me that it’s true. I know deep in my heart that it isn’t true, but it’s making me feel so awful, making me feel hopeless, pointless, and just completely depressed. Bought some 5-HTP and L-Tryptophan to help increase my serotonin levels (5htp to initially boost and l-tryptophan to keep my levels steady) Please, does anyone know how to help? I try accepting them as true, but it makes me feel worse than just questioning them, because if everyone and everything I know is fake, what’s the point of going on at all?

Just.a.bean

Date posted: 5y

The 5-HTP and L-Tryptophan should be here soon, but still waiting

katiesexistence

Date posted: 5y

Instead of agreeing with my thoughts, I try to accept the uncertainty that I can’t know. There isn’t an answer, no matter how hard you look, that will keep OCD safisified. Trust me, I know the feeling and I also struggle with existential OCD! Instead of accepting that everyone and everything you know is fake- try taking the approach “I can’t know for certain whether everyone is real or fake so why bother trying to find an answer” Maybe they are real or maybe they’re not! It’s okay not to know!

Just.a.bean

Date posted: 5y

Thank you, I’ll try that. It’s just so scary to not be able know for certain.

katiesexistence

Date posted: 5y

@Just.a.bean I totally understand! I struggled with this exact idea and it honestly doesn’t bother me anymore. You just have to keep pushing through

Dess

Date posted: 5y

Hey if you’re trying those supplements, read mood cure. A book you can order on amazon it tells you about all those supplements and how much to take :) I wish you luck my dear

Just.a.bean

Date posted: 5y

Thank you very much, I’ll look it up ?

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