Evelyn4416
- Date posted
- 5y
FathomableFathomable
- Date posted
- 5y
Idk as a teenager I was a red flag factory and my parents never did a damn thing to see if I was ok or get me any therapy, despite knowing I'd been bullied at school, by a childminder at a young age, and by my mother, that I had an eating disorder, and that I'd refused to go to school at all from age 15 or so. To this day instead of asking why I refused to go to school and what was wrong etc, he rants about how useless the school was about sending work home for me, which is exactly how he acted at the time. It's definitely a kind of willful ignorance, idk how conscious it is but clearly they have an issue of not wanting to acknowledge problems. My sister has always been a lot better at explicitly saying I'M SCREWED UP AND I NEED HELP SO SNAP OUT OF IT. It does hurt that both times I've had a diagnosis (PTSD, then OCD) their reaction to it was basically to say that I just think I have something, like they know better than both myself and my therapist or psychologist etc. Then I have to run them through the whole thing and stick it in front of their face, explain "hey the PTSD is kinda why I didn't get out of bed for 2 years" and "you know how I pace around all the time and have no friends and ask weird questions and sometimes panic about things happening which you think are ridiculous? OCD yo". All this denial and yet I get to hear about how I've not been able to start a successful middle class suburban life like my brother yet and I must just not be trying hard enough. I don't think they really put all these different things together to actually reflect on their attitude about it because that would involve admitting there are problems and they failed at various points. Much easier to just keep invalidating my experiences lol. God forbid I have a good period with less symptoms, because those mean it's DEF in my head ????? Oof this turned into a rant. My guess is similar to Bob's. For parents like this there is too much they'd have to acknowledge, including their own failures and baggage, if they actually admit you're not ok and engage with it.
Evelyn4416Evelyn4416
- Date posted
- 5y
I haven’t considered that angle ? that makes sense!
LodoloLodolo
- Date posted
- 5y
I can relate to that even thought it was not that bad for me when I lived at my parents place. I somehow feel that my mom still kind of like "does not remember" i have had an ed and have ocd even though I have told her and she should be aware. It's kinda like I am on mute when I am talking to her about these type of things. Now i am 23 and on my own and me and my mom are not very close at all. Dad was the best even though he did not understand either but i feel that he still cared about me. In my family mental health was some kind of taboo I guess and I was so afraid that my parents would find out I saw a psychologist. I just hate this and I am so sorry if someones family or friends have reacted to their ocd this way.
Evelyn4416Evelyn4416
- Date posted
- 5y
I so understand what you mean about to being on mute thing. In my case my dad doesn’t understand any of this as well but at least he supports what I think I should do. My mom is a physician but she never enjoyed studying the psychological part of medicine since she had to work with people with severe mental disorders during her residency. When I thought I just had anxiety she saw how badly I was doing and said I should take the medicine I was given at the time and she agreed when I said I should look for a psychologist. However it seems like that all changed once it turned out to actually be OCD. Now all of a sudden I’m spending too much money on therapy, I’m fine I just need to eat more fruits and do more exercise, etc. I’ve tried talking to her multiple times and I’ve even sent her an article to read on her own time but I don’t think she has. Also being a physician she is always doing research whenever one of us is sick or whatever yet has she done research on OCD in order to understand this? Nope! I’ve even explained ERP to her but when I talk about it and say how it’s anxiety inducing (which is the whole point) she’s like “aww well don’t do it then” like that proves to me she doesn’t get it because if she did she would encourage me to keep doing it despite the fear involved. That turned into my little rant but I just don’t get it.
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- Date posted
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- Date posted
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