A little „guide“ how I handle my intrusive thoughts/ocd/rocd based on cognitive behavioral therapy, ACT and mindfulness (if you are interested) -disclaimer- You do not have to do this this way! for others this might not be the best way to handle ocd. nevertheless, I have put this way to handle my ocd together with my therapist and it works for me and I wanted to share it because when I was on this side I always searched for something like this... intrusive thought: my boyfriend of two years shares a lot of traits with my ex my obsessive reaction: oh my god no this can‘t be! if they are alike this means I chose my current boyfriend because I was filling the void my ex left! This means we cannot be together anymore because our getting together was not perfect! I need to leave! my bodily reaction: panic, an unpleasent tingling sensation in my arms and legs, feeling dizzy my compulsions that I didn‘t do (yeeeay?): I wanted to check on the internet if this is indeed a red flag, what it means, if there is hope or if the relationship is doomed. I also wanted to phone my boyfriend and ask him if this is okay (again asking for reassurance) and I wanted to confess that I had these „bad“ thoughts and wanted to apologise -> all these behaviors to lessen the anxiety what I did instead: I recognized my want for reassurance (which I know is a compulsion) and stoped myself from doing it. I then asked myself „hm I wanted to ask some advise that some person I don‘t even know put on the internet... what is my opinion about such a matter, if a friend of mine asked me this question what would I say? (my answer would be: maybe yes your chioce would have been based on the void your ex left, but you cannot know for sure. does this really change the situation you are in? You do still love your boyfriend and you want to be together with him right? so this is something uncertain and let this uncertainty be and try not to do your compulsions -> your opinion matters more than what some random dude wrote about it in the internet other things I did: I looked back at my obsessive reaction and searched for some common patterns in my and also other persons‘ ocd patterns. overreacting, catastrophizing (because of this random thought everything is doomed, there is no room for any positivity and I cannot see any positive traits my boyfriend has), and most common in my ocd perfectionism (everything needs to be perfect if it is not, I need to leave so I realized jup seems like the same ocd pattern I always have so I let the anxiety be in my body. If I catch myself ruminating or doing other compulsions I stop myself and choose (this is important) „it‘s okay I can choose if I want to follow this anxious/ocd thought pattern or I can let the uncertainty be present and focus on the here and now“ than I usually let my focus fall on a certain body part (I like to focus on my toes because normally I would not focus much on them) but pick whatever you feel most comfortable with -> mindfulness and at some point the anxiety/ocd will lessen what I like to do after I had such a thought: I write it done, similar to how I‘ve written it done now, even after writing this I feel better and I memorize this one intrusive thought to use it in a little ERP session when I feel better/have more ressources to actually do the work of ERP I hoped this helped a few of you✨