Hi guys... I'm new here & not sure how this works but I could really use some help. I have the kind of OCD that hasn't let me eat or sleep in over a year now. I'm 8kgs under weight. I have not been able to function. I have nightmares & paranoia and sleep with all my lights on (if at all I manage to sleep). I'm always scared and struggle to breathe. I'm really restless & I have suicidal thoughts, sometimes. I also have anxiety disorder, depression & panic attacks. I don't know what to do. I want it to stop. Even if its for a few hours. Can anyone help me...? Please...?

TW. Also long post ahead . I’ve been dealing with OCD for the past 10 years. I’m 32 years old . I didn’t get diagnosed with OCD until this year. I was always diagnosed with GAD, panic disorder, and depression. I don’t have your typical compulsions. Mine are mostly all mental. Reassurance seeking, avoidance , repeating a prayer , etc . I have three main themes . Schizophrenia OCD, sexual orientation OCD, and HIV. Sometimes i deal with harm OCD and POCD but my main big three are the ones I listed first . I feel like the schizophrenic OCD is the most debilitating for me. For the last ten years I’ve been thinking I’m losing my mind . I thought once I got to a certain age the fear would go away but it hasn’t and is in full force . I’m constantly checking my surroundings, what I’m hearing, how I’m acting , questioning if things are real and so on . Now I do have times where this theme doesn’t bother me . It’s put on the back burner . I go through cycles . But when I’m focusing on this theme I feel like I’m hearing stuff . Most of the time I can’t make it out but recently I feel like I’ve been hearing a whisper saying “hey” . It mainly happens at night . It sends me into a complete panic and I feel like “this is it “ I’m seeing an OCD therapist and she recommended me to go to this psychiatric place in town to get meds to help my anxiety from the OCD. My last psychiatrist always pushed the newest medicine and was constantly changing up my regimen. I thought I would give it a try. WORST IDEA EVER . Keep in mind my therapist gave me a letter to give to her explaining I have been diagnosed with OCD and explaining it . She doesn't think I have OCD at all. She wanted to put me on an antipsychotic so me with my OCD brain . I asked her if she thought I was psychotic . She said I was nearing psychosis . She called me interesting . She feels like I have major depressive disorder . I'm just at a loss for words. It was honestly the strangest meeting I have had with a psychiatrist. It was very unprofessional. She has no idea the damage she has done nor do I think she cares. I just don't know what to Believe in anymore ... We met for approximately 45 minutes . First time ever meeting. I just want to cry and I’m freaking out 😢

I feel like it's got to a point that I just can't deal with stuff on my own anymore. I've tried to help myself with compulsions and thoughts and behaviours and it helps to an extent but I feel like I just need more help. But I don't even know where to start, I've felt so ignored in the past and I don't even know where you can turn to. I'm in the UK so it's difficult, especially considering I'm only 17, to get any help for this kind of thing. I just want someone to talk to, something to help – medication, maybe? I want to try it, I want to see if it would stop the overthinking for a while. Stuff isn't as bad as it has been before, but I feel like I can't just leave this anymore. I just don't know who to turn to or where to go from here.

Hi everyone, I’m reaching out here because I know this community understands the daily battles of living with OCD. Recently, I hit a really dark place and tried to take my own life. It’s been hard to admit, but I’m still here, and I’m trying to find a way forward. OCD feels relentless sometimes—the intrusive thoughts, the constant doubt, the cycles that never seem to end. It became so overwhelming that I didn’t see a way out. I know I need help, and I’m working on reaching out to professionals, but I also wanted to connect here. To those who’ve been in a similar place: What helped you keep going? How do you manage the darkest moments when OCD takes over? I feel like I’m holding on by a thread, but I’m holding on. Any advice, words of encouragement, or personal experiences would mean so much to me right now. Thank you for reading this, and for being part of a space where we can be honest about our struggles.