- Date posted
- 5y
- Date posted
- 5y
Hi, I'm really sorry you're struggling so much. And I completely understand how terrifying and scary it can be. I'm dealing with the same issue. However, mine goes even further. Sometimes I have thoughts where I come up with excuses for paedophilia, such children are sweet and cute, and things like this. It's terrible as I can't tell if I mean or not, if it's actually me or just my OCD playing with me. To make it even more difficult, these thoughts don't even seems intrusive anymore... My heart is pounding so fast as I'm typing this. I feel a lot, lot of shame and guilt. I'm sorry.
- Date posted
- 5y
No it’s ok. I understand what you’re going through. That’s what my brain is doing, finding excuses for it. And it seems reasonable, but then you’re like ‘omg what?!’ It’s insane. I am so sorry you are going through this
- Date posted
- 5y
@dmuhnyyy Yes, exactly, that's my reaction as well. I ask myself 'how am I able to think something like this?!'. I hate it more than anything. It's terrible.
- Date posted
- 5y
@corablue It really is. But we have to treat this like any other thoughts/feelings. Remember ocd can give you false feelings as well.
- Date posted
- 5y
Easer said then done I know but everytime we argue with it or try to analyse it or take It personaly we confirm its right to be heard were engaging with it attention is what it wants and it gets it because it freaks us out
- Date posted
- 5y
You are right. I am engaging with it way too much and answering to it too much
- Date posted
- 5y
Hi don't beat yourself up ocd can tell us anything Dont run with it don't play the game see it as what it is a thought nothing more
- Date posted
- 5y
I made the mistake and I’m trying to reason with it... and now it’s taken over
- Date posted
- 5y
Happens to me all the time
- Date posted
- 5y
REALLY?! Ugh I know we shouldn’t seek reassurance but I feel like such a monster. I want to find out if I agree so bad, but I can’t keep giving it attention
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- 5y
@dmuhnyyy Use exposure and other ERP techniques.
- Date posted
- 5y
Yer it pulls on are attention but it helps if your aware what it's doing then you can try distencing yourself from it
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- 5y
What do you mean?
- Date posted
- 5y
I myself am a mother and struggle with this alot trying to make sure that I'm not harming my children some how. I've been through sexual abuse as a child and have a hard time with intimate relationships as far as it goes with my husband because I have flash backs and thoughts that I'm harming or will harm my children but he knows that I'm not actually that way. I was scared of talking to a therapist about this cuz I thought my children would be taken away from me for being such a horrible person. But if you truly hate those thoughts and think you're a monster because of those thoughts then that shows you're the opposite of a monster. You just care so deeply that you don't want anyone hurt. ❤️ You're not alone. Don't suffer in silence. Many people don't understand this is simply just a disorder and nothing more.
- Date posted
- 5y
Thank you for this honey. I really do appreciate it. I have an appointment with my therapist today. I am so excited. I don’t want to think this way. I don’t want to feel sorry for pedophiles!!
- Date posted
- 5y
Its a horrible condition I hate hearing people like you suffering this get well soon
- Date posted
- 5y
It is the worst thing to ever happen to me. But thank you. I appreciate your kindness and any advice
- Date posted
- 5y
Your welcome
Related posts
- Date posted
- 15w
Hi I just have a few questions! (Im 14 btw) Okay so basically I’m really worried I’ll become a pedo/I already am and I don’t know it yet. I’m also really scared if I SA someone, even tho I don’t want to and I’d never do something like that but I feel like this part of me is saying that I will and it’s really scaring me. I feel so alone and I’m so scared I’m a bad person on the inside and this isn’t ocd and I’m gonna unleash hell on this earth I’m so scared. I’ll get a thought like if I’m walking past someone random it will be like “What if you sa them?” And it scares me so bad I feel horrible for thinking that. Is this apart of it? I feel like I’m always fixated on the topic of sa to check if I would do something like that, I don’t know anymore I just feel like a bad person (btw I have not done anything like that to anyone!)
- Date posted
- 13w
I don’t know if my hormones are extra wild this month or what, but I have been having so many POCD thoughts lately. It feels like I enjoy them in the moment, and then a few seconds later, I get this tiny flicker of *wait I don’t think I actually want to enjoy that.* It’s scaring me a lot. I was watching adult videos for the first time in about a year, since I had been avoiding them because of my OCD. I know they are not good for anyone, but I felt like i could (ironically it felt like a tiny win that my OCD had calmed down enough). But while watching, I had like 3 separate POCD thoughts. And it felt like I liked them. Like genuinely *liked* them. I don’t know if maybe my body was mixing up physical pleasure and mental pleasure, and then my brain inserted those not okay thoughts into the situation, which got tangled up with the pleasure responses I felt mentally and physically. It is all really confusing. I just feel so scared. I know OCD thoughts are supposed to feel real, and that once you get desensitized to the anxiety, they lose their power. But this feels like I am *actually enjoying* the thoughts, and that makes me want to cry. I’m scared that I actually like these thoughts when I’m really aroused :( Please help.
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- Date posted
- 11w
I am 15 years old and my POCD feels like its not POCD, i feel like i like my intrusive thoughts, but i have more intrusive thoughts about having intrusive thoughts, and i feel like i cant enjoy the things i normally enjoy anymore, like calling with my girlfriend and joking with her because this is still in the back of my mind, its making me question morals and if i ever even viewed P as completely wrong and i hate this so much, i love my nieces and nephews and when they're over i know id never do anything with my intrusive thoughts but when they arent present i feel like i like my thoughts. Before this i was dealing with HOCD and ROCD and i wish i could go back to that
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