Does anyone on here have any good sexuality resources?? I don’t know if it would help my HOCD or not to look into it but I feel if I had more education I might be able to accept some things.

I don’t know if this is appropriate, but I’m much more aroused by women in erotica in porn than men but I want to be with men/have always wanted to and I don’t know if by technicality that means im gay. I’ve only ever had sexual fantasies about men. I guess I can’t believe that I can feel that way about porn but still love my husband

@wellwellwell Well bisexuality and pansexuality is always a thing. It could also be possible that your aroused by that because you see yourself as the woman. Sexuality is a weird thing and it’s rare that anyone is all the way 100% straight has never even thought the same sex was attractive, or all the way 100% gay has never found another gender attractive. Additionally gender isn’t binary boy/girl, it’s much more complex. Sexuality is the same it’s not black and white.

@Nikki1809 How you choose to label yourself does matter. There are gay people who have experienced attraction to another gender on rare occasions and still consider themselves gay. I imagine the same can go for straightness.

@Nikki1809 I don’t know. I’m not interested in dating a woman and I don’t feel this way about women i meet. Only guys. So bisexual doesn’t feel right

@wellwellwell Some people split up their sexual and romantic orientations. Ie. Bisexual but heteroromantic means you find two or more genders attractive sexually but only the “opposite” gender attractive in an I-want-to-date-them sense. I myself am asexual biromantic—I’m not or am rarely sexually attracted to anyone , but I do have a desire for romantic intimacy with any gender. If that doesn’t feel right either then that’s fine! Lables are just lables, you don’t need to pick one, but if you want to say your straight there isn’t a criteria to meet to use that label.

@Nikki1809 I guess that makes sense. Considering how little I feel attracted to women I know I guess I know how I feel. I’m just afraid bc of the erotica thing

@wellwellwell You could just be a straight person who incidentally is aroused by woman in erotica. There’s no straight police who are going to take away a straightness card if you aren’t straight enough. (Not meant to sound rude).

@Nikki1809 You’re not being rude. There’s definitely a lot of ocd thinking here. I don’t understand why I think loving men and the erotic thing is mutually exclusive. You’re very right. I have some black and white thinking about sex

@wellwellwell I find that tends to be the case with a lot of sexual orientation ocd sufferers. Black and white thinking tends to be a hallmark of ocd. For me personally sex and romance are very different things, and then how you act sexually is not nessisarily connected to what your orientation is. And arousal doesn’t nessisarily mean attraction. I’m asexual, meaning I’m not sexually attracted to anyone, but I still get aroused if i see something sexual because that’s just what bodies do.

@Nikki1809 That’s definitely how I feel about all of this. I’m trying my best to just learn to accept things as they come