- Date posted
- 6y
- Date posted
- 6y
The best thing to do is to distract her by speaking to her or getting her a fidget! I have a fidget cube and it certainly helps me a lot and I know how your little sister feels!
- Date posted
- 6y
How old is she? I first noticed signs when I was 4 or 5 and had a very rough time starting at 7, diagnosed at 19. You’re a good sister, especially for looking out for signs. It’s really tough when you’re young going through it. Best thing is to not give reassurance. If you think she’s too young to understand, maybe reword things to not say why she’s feeling that way but just that distraction is helpful. Another good thing my therapist told me for my checking locks was to check once and make a clear mental note that it was definitely locked and then after that stop and resist the compulsions
- Date posted
- 6y
Maybe telling her she just feels high anxiety and that her OCD about different things such as her dog dying etc and reassurance seeking is just her brain trying to rationalize the anxiety....but if she were to deal with anxiety, like meditate, journal, etc that that would help her. That’s what I would say; hope she gets better!
- Date posted
- 6y
I definitely think some mindfulness exercises will help like meditation and breathing techniques. Maybe you can do them with her! Also, as hard as it may be, it’s best to try not to give reassurance like Smiley said.
- Date posted
- 6y
Thank you for replying! These suggestions are all really helpful. I think I will try doing meditation/relaxation with her and distracting her. She is still too young to understand why she is having these thoughts but I will explain that to her over time. Luckily she has a large selection of fidgets so that is useful! I’m hoping that the paediatrician will pick up on it when she goes for ASD and ADHD diagnosis and she will get the help she needs.
- Date posted
- 6y
@smiley She is eight now, I can’t imagine how difficult it must be for her because she has no idea why she is doing it. Thank you for the suggestion, I will help her to do that ☺️
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- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 21w
Hi everyone, I’m Cayla. I’m a mom that’s lived with OCD since childhood, but my breaking point came more recently after having my son. I was consumed by terrifying thoughts—What if I hurt him? What if I did something awful without realizing it? I was so afraid of my own mind that I couldn’t be alone with him. The shame and exhaustion were unbearable, and I convinced myself I was broken. In 2024, I finally sought help. ERP therapy at NOCD was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, but it saved my life. Even now, I have tough days, but I know I don’t have to be ruled by OCD. When my 12 year old daughter began showing signs of OCD, I felt overwhelmed with guilt. I never wanted her to go through what I had, but I knew what to do. I told her that I have OCD too and made sure she knew it wasn’t her fault—and that she wasn’t alone. One of the hardest parts of this journey was trusting someone else with my daughter’s OCD. I knew how vulnerable it feels to share intrusive thoughts, and I wanted her to feel safe. Her NOCD therapist was able to establish trust and genuine empathy from the start, and that relationship gave her the confidence to face ERP head-on. Seeing her build that trust made me certain she was in the right hands. ERP has helped both of us reclaim our lives, and it is beautiful to see my daughter managing her condition and making visible progress. Parenting with OCD while raising a child with OCD isn’t talked about enough, but I know so many parents are struggling with these same challenges. If you have questions about managing OCD while parenting, helping your child through ERP, or breaking cycles of guilt, drop them below—I’d love to share what I’ve learned. I’ll be answering all of the questions I receive in real-time today 4-5pm ET.
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 15w
I thankfully conquered harm ocd but I’m going through a flare up with relationship OCD, which I never got over. I know how bad reassurance seeking is but I can’t seem to quit. I ask my mom the same question countless times and it never helps. I feel bad because she tries to help and prevent me from seeking reassurance but I drive her crazy because I keep asking anyways. And if I don’t ask her, I reassure myself in my head. How are we supposed to resist these compulsions fully if we’re so scared? It feels as if I’ll never be confident enough to trust my own beliefs, even when I recover in the future with ERP
- Date posted
- 11w
My mom will sit and listen to me for quite a while, but she interrupts a lot and gets angry/upset. While I appreciate her passion, it's often stressful. Every time I come to her, if I even *mention* OCD, she gets frustrated and says, "Everyone deals with these issues, you know. It doesn't mean it's OCD." And I repeat, "I'm not saying my issues are unique — I'm saying the way I respond to them is a problem." But she just shakes her head and says, "Okay, I need to get back to my day." Full context, I'm an adult, and I live with my boyfriend, but I'm staying at my mom's for the next month. After living away from home for years, I went back to living with her during the pandemic, and I only recently left to live with him. Honestly, I think living with her for so long in my adulthood really messed with me and made me feel like a teenager all over again. I feel like my mental growth is stunted, and that's part of why my OCD is so bad lately. Not blaming, just noticing. She doesn't seem to understand how relieving the OCD diagnosis has been for me, because it explains so so so many things I've struggled with for years, and it's exciting to have more resources that can help me. But I think she sees it as me finding an excuse to *not* work on myself, which is just untrue. I'm not going to let OCD hold me back or use it as an excuse, but I'm also not going to pretend it's not a problem when I know it is — I was even diagnosed through NOCD. The whole point being to fix it, not use it as a crutch. When I have an issue, it's unbearable. Any issue, big or small, feels just the same. I feel a sinking feeling, my mind races, my heart beats out of my chest. I end up running to my support systems, crying, ruminating for days on end. Then, months later, the same exact issue can feel like nothing anymore, because it's no longer an obsession. I'm sure everyone deals with issues in a similar way, but I *know* there is something specific and debilitating going on with me. This is reassurance seeking, but in the face of being told I'm making a big deal out of nothing, can someone diagnosed with OCD tell me if they relate to the specific intensity of these feelings??
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