Sometimes I feel really isolated as a queer autistic person with ocd. :/

Same honestly. Even just that is hard for me.

Same :( it is hard sometimes

@AlliKat Yeah. But it’s nice to see everyone responding to this post who can relate.

I know homophobia and hocd are two different things. But I also need space sometimes to process the pain it causes me when I read posts about a person who is terrified they might be like me. Whether it be ocd about being lgbt+ or ocd about having autism. Because even if it isn’t meant to hurt me, it does. I can’t help that any more than they can. No one can control their feelings. And I understand that there is a lot of fear in hocd, but it is not a good excuse for saying offensive things. It’d help if I saw homophobia being called out by allies when it happened. Examples I’ve seen on this app: —calling it a sin to be lgbt+ —comparing being gay to pedophilia. —saying you couldn’t stand it if a loved one was gay —misgendering trans folks by implying that being attracted to a trans man is the same as being attracted to a woman. —implying you can’t live happily ever after if your gay —using slurs —implying it’s better to be dead than to be gay. (Side note—I see this waaay too often about having a disability too, in and outside of the ocd community). —asking someone questions about their sexuality for reassurance when it was uninvited. (This one happens the most from what I’ve seen). Thanks for listening.

@Nikki1809 Absolutely, I’m sorry if I seemed dismissive of your concerns. I absolutely agree with you that homophobia is inexcusable, especially in the context of HOCD. I’m so sorry that you’ve experienced these hurtful things and as someone who wants to learn how to be an ally, I want to be able to educate the community too. Fear is not an excuse to be homophobic, ever. I’m sorry again if I hurt you with my comment. Thank you for helping educate me!

@199903 You’re all good. :) I could tell you were trying to help. I genuinely was just starting a discussion. It’s late where I am and I’m sleepy but still awake because insomnia, so I’m sorry if I came of as cold.

@Nikki1809 No you’re absolutely fine! I really appreciate you bringing up the things going on within the OCD community that are hurtful towards LGBT members. It must be really upsetting. I think it’s definitely something that needs to be addressed!

@199903 Glad to hear! Thank you for listening and being receptive.

Me too! I’m bi and in a committed relationship with my girlfriend. I don’t like saying it cuz it sounds mean, but it can be really hard sometimes to read posts where straight people are terrified of being not-straight.

@Nikki1809 Yes, I feel the same way— whenever I mention I’m gay in a post people will ask me questions about it for reassurance and it makes me feel like my sexuality is being taken advantage of. It can be difficulty for sure.

@worryqueen Yes, I’ve had that happen too. It feels a lot like I’m just being seen as a tool, not a person.

@Nikki1809 Yeah it makes me upset. I wish I understood hocd more because I just don’t get why it is scary to be gay? It just gives me the impression they think it’s a bad thing even though I know that’s probably not the case

@worryqueen Yeah. I feel like it’s not an overt homophobia thing, but I do think if we didn’t live in a homophobic society there wouldn’t be a reason to worry about being queer. And I’ve definitely seen a lot of misconceptions about being queer on here. I was also a little disappointed when we had the diversity matters livestream about ocd and lgbtq+ community, and it turned into a livestream about hocd instead of a livestream discussing the inersection of being queer and mentally ill, which I thought it would be. Like is there a time and place for discussing hocd? Absolutely. But taking over a space meant for us felt...idk I didn’t like it.

@Nikki1809 Yeah that makes me upset, I just hope none have a different mindset such as not wanting to be queer because it’s unnatural etc. And I didn’t know we that live, I wish I could’ve seen it but I guess it’s best I didn’t if that’s what happened. Again, I think it’s people taking advantage of the topic and turning it into a tool for themselves. Doesn’t sit right with me.

@worryqueen Yeah. I hope so too. I’m guessing there’s some who do and many more who don’t think that way. And yeah the livestream thing bothered me a lot. And the more space I get from it the more it continues to bother me when I think about it.

@Nikki1809 Yeah it breaks my heart that this community isn’t completely accepting and supportive. I’m disappointed but used to it. I know hocd focuses on the fear of losing your identity, but whenever people talk about it they act like being gay is disgusting and a sin etc. Bothers me a lot.

@worryqueen Yeah. I’ve been afraid to say anything about it because I don’t want to be misunderstanding hocd. But yeah I do often come across posts that are hard for me to get through. I think it’s not usually intentional, but that doesn’t make it less hurtful.

@Nikki1809 Agreed. People just need to learn how to phrase things better and realize how it can hurt our community.

Hey!!! Good to meet you!!

@Nikki1809 Likewise!

Nice to meet you. :) I was diagnosed with adhd before being diagnosed with autism so I have a lot of overlap in my symptoms.

@Nikki1809 Likewise! :) Were you misdiagnosed or just happen to have both?

@Eljaeee I think I have both. I was very young when I was diagnosed though.

Heyo! Nice to meet you! :)

@soup It is! I definitely needed this, seeing that I’m not alone.

@soup It is! :)