I’m feeling super guilty about something that happened over a month ago. I was talking with this guy and I get very anxious when I talk to new people and I have what I call vocal diarrhea, and say things I shouldn’t. So anyway we were talking about stuff via video chat and he asked me about my ex best friend and what happened to make us not be friends anymore. I told him everything that led to the end of the friendship. And then he encouraged me to name drop her. And let me tell you the millisecond after her name left my lips I REGRETTED it. I feel like such a freaking horrible person, I had no right to name drop her. turns out his best friend is related to her, I don’t think he’d say anything, honestly, he did ghost me a couple weeks later because I told him I wasn’t ready to meet during the pandemic. It was at the height of my OCD and I know that’s not an excuse But I feel absolutely horrible, because she is a good person. She’s not evil (I never said she was) but I was so hurt and it felt good to tell a stranger what hurt me. I just wish I never said anything. I hope he forgot her name, because he said he didn’t know her. I just don’t want to be the reason someone thinks she’s a bad person. She has a good heart. But she did things that broke my trust irreconcilably. Please don’t think I’m a horrible person. We all make mistakes, I never want to be the reason to cause her pain. (Nothing I said was like inappropriate or anything of that nature. Just things that led to the downfall of our friendship.) Just how do I deal with this? I haven’t spoken to her in over a year. I’m not going to call her. But should I feel guilty over this still? Is it okay to let the guilt go?

Morpheus 75

Date posted: 5y

I think that you don't have to push forward the details about yourself feeling uncomfortable for what you said to him about your ex best friend. Nevertheless, maybe just tell him stuff like "By the way, I needed to talk to someone about this because it has broken my heart to lose such a good friend and I appreciated sharing it with you, yet it doesn't mean I wish bad things to her, and I keep a huge respect to this person".

Morpheus 75

Date posted: 5y

What did you say to him to feel that much under pressure. At first sight it seems to me you just explained the reason why you don't get along with your ex best friend anymore. It doesn't seem that serious. If you feel in pain maybe you can send back a new message to recall how much you respect your ex friend to him, and how much consideration you have for her. Maybe it'd counterbalance the all ?

We Will Prevail

Date posted: 5y

I know I’m blowing it out of proportion, probably. But I randomly recalled it and now I can’t stop overthinking, to the point I’m questioning if I remember what I told him correctly. Honestly he wasn’t a very nice dude. But I unfortunately live in a toxic community, where everyone is in eachothers business. I mean I don’t think he’d be the type to say anything. I hope not. But I have the fear of someone putting false words in my mouth as well. I’ve been debating messaging him but I feel uncomfortable. I’d feel better telling him to not let that conversation make him think she was less than a nice person. Idk maybe I’ll do that

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