- Username
- Ania85
- Date posted
- 4y ago
The ruminating and constant need for reassurance is frustrating. For me letting go of control is very hard. I think it’s something I have to work at everyday “rather than ask if you can ever be free, because ever is a huge amount of future time, ask if you can be free at this moment. The only place where you can or need to be free is this moment not the rest of your life. Just now.” When I catch myself ruminating I try to do something like clean, chat with a friend etc
Thank you for sharing! OCD steals precious time from my life. It always makes me question things. It keeps me in a state of anxiety and fear and doesn't allow me to move forward.
I do try to ask myself - even if this thought is true is there any action I need to take right now? Most of the time the answer is no. Key thing being action is NOT the same as compulsion. For example, I have a bug bite - my intrusive thought is that it's a brown recluse. Even if it is - is there any action I can take at this moment when it's a tiny bug bite? It isn't at the point where going to the doctor makes sense. So I try to give myself permission to let it go and just see what happens, I can't do anything to change it right now.
I really like that, thank you for sharing! Letting it go and seeing what happens is a great idea.
@Ania85 Yay! Hope it helps. Sometimes I'll even set a threshold. Like if in X # of days it isn't better I'll make an appointment or something like that and then it's easier to let it go until I get to that point and 99% of the time by then whatever it is is gone. :)
@Ania85 I read a book once that said there is no problem if there's no action to be taken and I try to use that as a mantra.
@Cher1943 Great idea all around! I hope you're doing well!!
@Ania85 Thanks! You too. I'm loving this app it is making me feel more connected and helps me stay on track.
@Cher1943 What exactly does that mantra mean?
@Coul.C Basically, I interpret it as that if there's no decision to make at this moment - then there's no true problem. Problems require a solution. So for example if I have a thought of "my stomach feels funny" and that becomes "what if I have a horrible disease" I ask myself even if I do do I have enough information right now to do something about it. And if I don't, then it isn't a problem right now, in this moment. I think it's just another way to kind of ground myself in the moment.
@Cher1943 It's the Eckhert Tolle book The Power of Now. I'll paste the passage.
@Coul.C This is from The Power of Now by Eckhert Tolle. If you found yourself in paradise, it wouldn’t be long before your mind would say “yes, but. . . .” Ultimately, this is not about solving your problems. It’s about realizing that there are no problems. Only situations — to be dealt with now, or to be left alone and accepted as part of the “isness” of the present moment until they change or can be dealt with. Problems are mind-made and need time to survive. They cannot survive in the actuality of the Now. Focus your attention on the Now and tell me what problem you have at this moment.
@Cher1943 Also from the book: I am not getting any answer because it is impossible to have a problem when your attention is fully in the Now. A situation that needs to be either dealt with or accepted — yes. Why make it into a problem? Why make anything into a problem? Isn’t life challenging enough as it is? What do you need problems for? The mind unconsciously loves problems because they give you an identity of sorts. This is normal, and it is insane. “Problem” means that you are dwelling on a situation mentally without there being a true intention or possibility of taking action now and that you are unconsciously making it part of your sense of self. You become so overwhelmed by your life situation that you lose your sense of life, of Being. Or you are carrying in your mind the insane burden of a hundred things that you will or may have to do in the future instead of focusing your attention on the one thing that you can do now.
@Rivlet86 I don’t mean to trigger anyone may i adk a question that makes this quote hard to apply to myself?
@Coul.C I don't mind if you ask a question.
It does.
So with magical thinking ocd it’s as if there is always a “solution” with whatever compulsion so it makes it hard to not do.. basically you’re feeling like there’s always something you can do. Not sure if im explaining it correctly
Hmm yeah I do see what you're saying. It may not work as well for that particular type of OCD. I don't know a lot about magical thinking. If you always think there's an immediate solution then it could get tricky
Yeah I think it's important to remember that what may work for one person, may not work for everyone! This is what works for @Rivlet86
Not to sound too depressing but does anybody else get scared or worried about the fact you have to deal with OCD for the rest of your life now that you have it.. Is it even possible to live somewhat of a normal life and have your thoughts not bother you as much?
Any tips on this theme? Some of my thoughts with this them are bizarre. To someone who has been through it what did you do ab your thoughts
So the key about dealing with OCD's constant fears and "what ifs" is to basically not care since the reason it sticks is because you care... A LOT. So... how do I not care? It's really hard? Do I pretend I'm not bothered? Because that kind of feel like repression. I know you need to feel the anxiety but alsl if you didn't care about the thoughts/feelings you basically wouldnt have OCD. (No reassurance please, thank you!)
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond