I know maybe it's not a place for this... but I really need help or just some virtual hugs: My parents.. my dad is suing my mom for full custody of my little brother. My dad has reasons, and my mom has reasons to be upset. I can't tell exactly what's going on but all I know is that their bad relationship kept escalating since the divorced three yrs ago. I've JUST turned 19 and they're still not getting along whatsoever which Whatever. I've done my bit in trying to help them be friends somehow for so long, but nevermind now. If my brother is in any way mentally, emotionally, spiritually (etc) more depressed by our parents actions and words, I have so many reasons to find a way to just have custody of him. My parents won't quit. And It's making my heart break. I just feel so shattered. Idc that they are divorced. I have overcome that. But the fact they hate each other more is beyond a shattered heart. My brother is not an excuse to lash back at each other. I have worked so hard to move away from self harm or worse. I will nOt see my brother suffer similar/same/or worse days than me. If I have custody of him somehow, will that help my parents "case"? Or am I now just another escalating-livid-jerk...? Are my intentions going to hurt my brother more than what is presently going on with my parents? Idk anything anymore. It's always been him and I.... on our own. Helping each other find reasons to love the world the way we see it right now. I'm done with my parents. I love them greater than their hatred, and I choose to step away because I want to protect my view of what my future love life will be like. And I choose to hope to be a better loving example, than my parents unchanging habits, for my little brother.. show a way for him to be a better person for his future love and family.

Thank you @garden. I know he'll be okay, though I pray he'll be better than "okay". I just hope he knows he truly isn't alone...I tell him often that he's not alone, though I don't know if he really understands. I give him a hug anyways, and I pray. :)

@flowla I think he knows he’s not alone. One day he’ll understand all this and be so so grateful for you.

@garden ♡ :)

@flowla 💛💛And don’t forget to look after yourself aswell

@garden Aww thank you! You too! :) ♡

I know thank you. I didn't hope for this but I don't regret being that figure/person for him.

@flowla i'm glad u at least have each other and he feels the same way but remember ur still a kid too and if it's too much u can take a step back

@worthenava Thank you @worthenava. I have never taken a break before... and lately because of work and me living far away from my brother... I kinda have to have a break. I am trying to let go of some things yet still be a good sister from afar. I let him know I'm there whenever he needs me or wants to talk to me. It's hard. Because it's always been the two of us. And sometimes I think it's crazy to think this but it makes sense: I feel like a mother could feel...while letting her child go... letting them grow, finding their own way in this world... and still being around when they need help. But the fact of leaving him to find his own way, that maybe I've done what I can, scares me... and yet I know he'll be okay.

@flowla just from reading that i know you're doing the right thing. always here to talk

@worthenava Thanks! Same to you 😊

Thanks, I've felt like I have been more mature than any kid growing up besides my best friend. And I think that it helped in the long run for my brother. He too is mature for his age, he be smarter about certain subjects than I am... like math. And reading. It's insane but awesome. I helped him with school when he was growing up. Now that he knows a bit of calculus, he helps me now... with my work. I'm nearly 8 yrs older than him! Haha :) We have fun when it comes to teaching each other math. He's always right about the answer and I'm always overthinking it.

Yes, he's 11. And I have yet to tell him anything about custody, overall, I tell him whatever he does need to know. And right now, I'm told by our parents he need not know what's going on with our parents. But I have a sense that he should know a little bit. Give him a reason as to why they dislike each other so much even more so now. I'm trying though... I look to make sure in ways that I can that my little brothers okay. But he isn't. I can't do this without my parents permissions but I want him to go into counseling like I did. But my parents can't afford it right now and or I have asked our parent he lives with the most to take him to counseling appointments or some sort of therapy. But it's not happened yet, And I have asked for three years in the time my parents have been divorced. I needs professional help so that he doesn't feel worse when he's a teenager like I was (and I was going through my own struggles and burdens that I didn't share until right before my family's separation). I can't be there 24/7 like I use to. Even if we were in the same house still. I can't be there for always, but I am always a call or text away. I just hope my bro remembers that. (Thank you for all ur words!)

@flowla It sounds like a really rough situation. I’m sure your doing your best and I can tell you really care about him. Make sure you’re taking care of yourself too. ❤️