Alyosha

Date posted: 5y

Need suggestion: Top-of-hierarchy contaminant may have touched the quilt on my bed. Washing the quilt feels like giving in, but I’m having a difficult time imagining I could sleep in it, or have anything touch it. Avoiding it and washing it seem like the two options lol. Any suggestions on how I could make this a useful experience without doing a bigger ERP than I’m able to do...?

Alyosha

Date posted: 5y

Thanks, everyone. I touched the quilt, haven’t washed my hands for an hour, have gone about my day, touching stuff... I feel like I should do more. I can rev up the anxiety. It’s the aftermath that freaks me out. “Sure, you’re fine now. What happens on Monday, though, when you realize everything in your apartment is dirty?” That’s the thing about ERP...it’s the gift that keeps on giving lol. I’m going to postpone decisions about the quote for another 90min. I’ll think about it, then. Thanks again for letting me share. I’m a little embarrassed to share so much, so thanks for being kind.

Alyosha

Date posted: 5y

Quilt, not quote 🙄

Ben84

Date posted: 5y

That took courage ☺!

Alyosha

Date posted: 5y

@Ben84 Thanks, Ben! Thanks for being there.

catattak

Date posted: 5y

I am so impressed that you can postpone those thoughts!! I agree with the delayed ocd thoughts. I get that too. Maybe we've spoken about it. You know what though? On Monday you'll just have to be like "whatever, I've already slept in it. It's over. Nothing we can do now" and go about your day. That's what I do.

person1

Date posted: 5y

Congrats on not looking for reassurance and truly seeking out help! I def agree with Ben on this one.

Alyosha

Date posted: 5y

Thanks!

Alyosha

Date posted: 5y

I’ve decided to wash it. Purposefully contaminated a couple more things with it first...which is now making me nervous. Feel a little disappointed, but it is the item at the very top of my hierarchy.

person1

Date posted: 5y

Good first exposure! Go longer next time it happens.

Ben84

Date posted: 5y

I think you handled it quite reasonably. There's always next time ☺.

Ben84

Date posted: 5y

What about tabling it for tonight and coming back to it tomorrow?

Alyosha

Date posted: 5y

...but I have to sleep in it tonight

Ben84

Date posted: 5y

@Alyosha Could you take the quilt off for tonight?

person1

Date posted: 5y

#proud

Alyosha

Date posted: 5y

Aw thanks ❤️

Meof3

Date posted: 5y

You are doing so well. Keep it up. Tell OCD you are the boss. Ocd lies to us that we are unable to do certain things. It is not true. Keep challenging it. I have never regretted challenging OCD. It might feel bad in the moment but always better long term.

Alyosha

Date posted: 5y

Thank you! ❤️

catattak

Date posted: 5y

You did great!

Anonymous

Date posted: 5y

WHAT IS IT I’m so curious now lol

Alyosha

Date posted: 5y

Hahaha. It is that-which-shall-not-be-named.

Anonymous

Date posted: 5y

@Alyosha Let me express something to you ok... whenever I worry about something, it is hard for me to see what is a normal worry and what is ocd. We all know that ocd exaggerates things and makes us worry about things that most people don’t care about. So, occasionally when I’m having a bad episode my husband will say “purple elephant”. That means my worry is equivalent to “what if purple elephants fly outside?” Which yes could happen.... in like a .0000000001% chance lol This is purple elephant, girl. Go to sleep.

Alyosha

Date posted: 5y

Meh. I could...put something on the bed for a few minutes and then not wash the thing I put on the bed....man...even that feels too big.

Ben84

Date posted: 5y

You could try that and use the SOS feature?

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