Hi there my name is tahahussain and i am not in the state never have been but pliease can u help me So here the thing everyday i wake up i have to think of beautiful face and swallow my spit while thinking but most of the time faces of ugly people just pop out randomly and i have to do all over again so after that i have a specific time in that time i wash face but first i look at a beautiful face of a man while swallowing then i look at someone near by and swallow while thinking about their face and if i dont do that i began to think that my face is becoming ugly so after that i wash my face while thinking of handsome faces and then after drying off look at those beautiful male face again and then faces of real people and if i fail to do so i have to do the whole ritual again untill i have done it right i. Prevent mirrors and even camera screen like taking a selfie and the whole day i just keep thinking about beautiful faces but the problem is that from random places in my head ugly face pop up i dont know how to over come i tried my own therapy and even visited a phycologist he recommended and cyperlix a pill everyday but it does not seems to workand if i dont stop this behavior and ritual my parent said that they will disown me and throw me out of house i have controlled some of my obsession and compulsion such as i stopped masterbating because whenever i did it i have to masterbate while thinking and seeing a beautiful face and if not my mind will say that do it again and again it made me do it almost over 50 times or more i would have lost concious but now i dont masterbate just for that reason please help me u r my only hope now after that the only way out is to kill my self

Are you able to phone the hotline?

Keep focusing on working on you ocd and recovering. The depression and suicidal thoughts are from the unmanaged ocd. They will subside as you get better. If you can’t manage the depression, reach out to the psychiatrist that prescribed the cipralex ssri medication.

I have been trying to contact a therapy but i am not in united states and u dont give me a call

How long have you been doing this? When did it start.

2 years

Please someone response i am on the urge of killing my self

I’m not a doctor, but you might be describing sensorimotor ocd. It’s not the “faces “ but the swallowing. Compulsions in response to sensorimotor obsessions are usually limited to repeated attempts to use distraction to interrupt the fixation on sensory phenomena. ***Trigger Warning *** https://iocdf.org/expert-opinions/when-automatic-bodily-processes-become-conscious-how-to-disengage-from-sensorimotor-obsessions/

“Obsessing” over beautiful face versus ugly face. “Compulsion” when it matches beautiful then “ok” to swallow.

Ok. Realize it’s the way you are reacting to the content of your thoughts. You have conditioned yourself to react to these intrusive thoughts.

I wantes to talk to a therapist but there are none in my country

You have to relearn to accept the thoughts coming in and acknowledge them. Something like “My ocd keeps telling me that I have to see perfect faces before I swallow. I’m ok it’s just my ocd doing this. It’s not me and I’ll let the thoughts pass right now”

Remember don’t beat yourself up over the ocd. It’s the way the brain is processing the content of the thoughts.

Its the only way i believe

When the ugly faces pop up, say to yourself “their they are again, those ugly faces, I like how my ocd is trying to distract me from swallowing normally”. You must recondition yourself.

We focus on the “content” of intrusive thoughts, when we should really be focusing on the way we process the thoughts. Those thoughts scare us and activate the flight, fight or freeze response in our bodies. We react by doing some type of compulsive behavior to get relief. So, it’s not the “content” of your thoughts that mean anything at all but how you process and react to them. If you process them as true thoughts and spend energy on the reactions, you will perpetuate the vicious cycle of OCD.

Even if u dont believe in god may he bless u with the greatest gift he can ever give to anyone

As you work on managing the intrusive thoughts: “random faces appearing” then you will “slowly” reduce them from causing the anxiety.

Start studying about “sensorimotir ocd”. Learn as much as you can about it. Ask a therapist if they understand it and can help you with a treatment plan. You’re doing good and the more you understand it the better you will feel.

Keep going forward 👍❤️

Hi Taha. Please look after yourself and don’t ever consider suicide as an option. Ocd is so painful I know, but overwhelming feelings pass, and you can get better from this!! Please keep reaching out for help. Is there a suicide hotline you can call or an online chat in case you have these feelings again? Maybe keep researching online for websites that may assist you. I googled ‘suicide chatline international’ and a few results came up. Please reach out for help because you deserve support :)

Pakistan

I found a website called ‘suicide stop’ that lists the suicide hotlines for many countries. Can you have a look at that? Have you got a friend you can talk to?

https://www.suicidestop.com/call_a_hotline.html

If you scroll through there’s many different counties and I saw a number for Pakistan. I don’t know if it’s work but I’m just trying to help!

You can also research suicide apps. Which I think you will be able to do because you found this app :)

No worries. Please make a promise to yourself to keep yourself safe. Keep reaching out for help. You can get help for your emotional pain, things will get better :)

Please reach out for help. Did you find the number to call? Do you have friends or family you can ask for help, you don’t have to disclose your ocd, but can just say you need help?

They wont pick it

Ok keep looking for the apps and looking for websites to help you. Maybe someone else on here can procide suggestions. Please keep yourself safe. Please look after yourself whether that’s listening to music, watching a show, whatever you can do to relax. Take care

Sorry I have to go now. Keep looking. Sorry I couldn’t be more help. Take care please!!!

Work with your doctor that prescribed the medicine. Call them and let them know.

Hey, have you heard of ERP? It’s how ocd is treated and there are ways to do it on your own if therapy isn’t an option. This app is one place that can help. Some articles about self help for ocd and doing ERP: https://iocdf.org/about-ocd/ocd-treatment/erp/ https://www.treatmyocd.com/blog/what-exactly-is-exposure-and-response-prevention-erp/ https://www.get.gg/ocd.htm Some self help books: https://iocdf.org/books/ Here is an article about sensorimotor ocd which sounds like maybe what you have? https://iocdf.org/expert-opinions/when-automatic-bodily-processes-become-conscious-how-to-disengage-from-sensorimotor-obsessions/

Fuxk it i cannot do it i just cant i am sick of threatening my self i felt that knife but was unable to move it my country sucks and no one care about me anymore u people have never seen poverty and illness at same time u cannot understand it and my doctor is a fucked up moron he just seen zoned my messages even tho i paid him a hell lot of moeny i tried the erp therapy on my own but the pain is just going to kill me i counldnt think straight all i had weres pictures ofugly faces i am damn gonna do something before i tried something else whixh is a painless death

Work with everybody here. We all have ways to help you.

Just how tell me the therapist didnt even gave me a call just because i am a outsider tell me will it make u poor or go broke to just attened a 15 min call from a person who is not a United state national

Either this is some way of making money for doctors or such website or i have gone crazy and just wanted to get better

They can’t practice therapy outside the US. It’s a licensing issue and US laws.

Taha, take deep breaths. I am here to talk. We will get through this together and there are so many people here that can help you. Please let me know what I can do to help.

You guys are amazing with your support. I gave nothing to add, but sending prayers for you tahahussain0. Dont give up.🙏