My OCD convinces me I'm attracted to my brother and it kills me

I get this with my own brothers and family members and it sucks smh. I even gotten myself to feel attracted to myself but I was able to overcome that somewhat but I still get a sensation when I see a picture of myself smh.

I’ve had these too, it will convince you of the things you find so strange

Idk how to explain it really it just happened the same way I got HOCD. I just said to myself watch I might start to get attracted to myself and I guess I got a little anxiety about it and avoided looking at myself in fear that I might start to get attracted to myself and when I realized what I did I basically started to agree with the OCD thoughts and and since I love myself and I do happen to be a good looking guy I just agreed with the OCD and now I can say to myself I am a sexy motherfucker and I don’t get anxiety about it because it’s myself. My OCD is probably a lot worse than yours which is why I was able to fear looking at myself and avoid looking at my pictures in fear. When you have OCD you can get yourself afraid of anything really if you really tried. I made myself fear of getting erect when I see a woman because it was just happening way to much to my liking that a dude would walk by and think I got it for him smh and it used to pissed me off so I was like fuck this I’ll get myself a fear of this too just to prove to motherfuckers I have OCD and anxiety which can cause me to fear anything and everything and that I’m not gay but because I feared it I became it in an OCD way. I had a gay dream once which made me fear that I was gay but didn’t start to get feelings of possibly being gay until 2 yrs after I had that dream that got me scared. I started to get a sensation feeling every time I saw a guy I never met before and would start to get an arousal feeling towards dudes I’ve talked to before but never had before. This was all caused because of my dumbass not knowing I had OCD and taking pre workouts and drinking on the weekends would increase OCD, anxiety, and depression smh. I mean I couldn’t have known back then but I wished I did or I wouldn’t of never took a pre workout or start drinking or start to think I became gay smh. I had always wanted a wife and kids but I guess when you have OCD and your first relationship doesn’t go so well you start to get depressed and start to think maybe I should become gay since I can’t meet a chick who’s as perfect as I want her to be or find a chick who’s as good as me smh. Obviously that’s ROCD but again I barely knew I had OCD back in June of this year and I was dealing with ROCD and HOCD for a total of 6 yrs now but never knew it was OCD. So that’s my story and I probably shouldn’t have said all this because it just gives me reassurance but I wanted to be able to help you out with how OCD works and how I got an intrusive thought of myself smh haha. Hope this helps.

Same also ):

you’re not alone! i hate it

-TKO I already did that a year ago at this time and I ended up fucking myself up with it because I was pre diagnosing myself and honestly didn’t know I had OCD. I knew I had a mental disorder but I wasn’t sure what. So because I went back in forth with do I have HOCD or am I actually gay I messed myself up even more without getting the proper help. I can’t go back and change it but I kind of know what I have to do to alleviate my anxiety but haven’t found the right time to do the stupid thing I need to do smh.

It's so strange. Like if my brother does something I'll have a way of viewing it like weirdly. Like if he smiles I'm like that was cute and I'm just like what the fuck is wrong with u why are u saying that???!!

And it's so strange!!! Like I wouldn't even think about things like that with someone I like. its just weird, hard to explain

Well u have a week to start a new year and I moving foward Hope I can start exercising Eating healthier stop my instuvice taughts .my hocd started one day I went to a auction saw a guy For some reason I mind said this is a pretty good looking guy which I used to say thst about any body and never bother me I had ocd all my life but not hocd is it hard because I love women and have no desire to be gay. I am sorry no problem with gay guys but I love women.