someone please give me advice. what would you do in my situation. i keep getting transphobic intrusive thoughts... and my boyfriend is trans... my head keeps trying to misgender him and i love him to pieces. i was never like this before.. the thoughts are so ugly and disgusting and i don’t want to give up on him or us. what would you do in my situation. i just want to keep him safe and when i get thoughts like these i feel beyond terrible and confused about myself. please only respond if you’re accepting. no transphobic comments will be tolerated. i’m already frightened as it is and ignorance doesn’t help

thank you so much for this comment. he knows that i’ve had intrusive thoughts like these before and he’s always been so loving and supportive and made me feel better. this time it just feels like these thoughts are trying to go deeper and be hyper aware of the gender he was assigned at birth and scare me with more thoughts and it also might be my environment because they are highly transphobic and against the lgbtq community. i’m just scared if it’s actually me and that i’m not accepting and if i have to give up on him. everything feels so blurry in my head right now. and i don’t want to tell him about these thoughts in detail cause i know they would hurt him too much. don’t want to make him feel worse about himself. i just want to get through this and love him he’s really everything i could ever want and we just celebrated our 1 year which tbh i was scared if we wouldn’t reach it but we did and well i definitely don’t want to give up now this fear just of course scares me. he’s the only one that gives me happiness. this week wasn’t as bad as i was dealing with the uncertainty. calling him every single day and trying to just sit with the fear. i hope it doesn’t last forever but once again i really appreciate your comment and advice 🤍 i’m really wishing all the best with whatever you’re going through and i’m always here if you need someone to talk to

@getwellsoon Of course. I understand your fear of hurting him. Truly, I do. If he's been supportive in the past, it really may help if you explain it to him. I highly doubt your intrusive thoughts would harm him as long as he's aware they're intrusive and you're also hurt by them passing through your mind. I really isn't you. 💜 Being trans, I'm sure he understands how crucial mental health is and especially support. If he needed support from you, you'd be willing to provide it, right? Don't let the intrusive thoughts convince you that either of you care less about one another than you actually do.

@Sataniceratops it’s just he’s been here through all of them. he’s the only one that understands and i don’t want to just keep venting all the time to him. feel like it’s too much on my end sometimes. guess i just have to just accept the uncertainty no matter the thoughts coming into my head. be as loving as i can and hope that eventually this will all pass. i thought i was close to getting over it because slowly old intrusive thoughts i used to obsess over have been trying to pop up and now it’s all a mix and it’s really frustrating. i know i love him and i know he loves me. and that i’ll have to get through the hard days i just hope they don’t last much longer. thank you for being so kind 🤍