Struggling with my partner not following basuc infection control. One example. I. Like to use 1 cloth for drying hands and one cloth for drying countertoos after antibacing(well I like to let the countertoops dry themselves to allow the surface cleaner to work but my partner insists on drying them). My. Partner will wash.her hands then dry them then use same cloth.for counters. This is driving me mad but when I say to her. About it. She ignores me and acts like It's erp for ocd. Personally this grates me and makes me angry as its not ocd it's just basic hygiene. But she won't have it. I've even suggested using paper towels.for her hands but again she ignored me. She just sees everything as my ocd. I'm quite pissed off today. She won't even d8scuss it as she she's it as ocd and I'm criticising her

That's not basic hygiene. We dry hands after washing them on the teatowels then use those to dry counters, dishes etc on a daily basis.

You have a hard time😢 You know your "basic infection control" isn't the same as your partners. And I would probably manage as your partner, although I have OCD...because I haven't the same theme as you. I try to let my husband make the decisions when we diagree, because I know he has a sound mind and even uf my OCD screams I have to learn to live my life more "normal"- try to accept your horribel feelings and your frustration and think about what is most important to you. More freedom and a healthy relationship to your partner or letting the OCD rules win? I know how hard it is, be kind to yourself and try to break your rigud rules.

Thank you. I do have a hard time working out what is normal and what is ocd

My partner is away to the shops and I am having a head time trusting her to stay safe and sanitised, and trusting her to sanitise the stuff she brings ftom the shop. But I know I have to just let it go and trust her or our relationship won't survive. In my mind I'm Trying to say to myself she will do it right and if she doesn't it will be her fault of we f er covid 19. I'm ashamed of these thoughts and I know they aren't healthy and they are making me angry. I just know she isn't the most careful as she has already gotten a cold and how that would of happend of she had been following guidelines on masks and hand sanitation I do not know.

I see cross contamination points everywhere and my partner doesn't think its a risk. Its making me feel physically sick thinking about all the things I'm my mind she does wrong. I'm supposed to be working from home today and I can't concentrate I'm so wound up

You are so so right akd talk complete sense and I need to hear it. I just am totally floored by all this at the minute I really am and I hate myself for it and I hate that I'm making mum y partner uncomfortable in her own home when this virus has made me uncomfortable in my onw home or anywhere else for that matter. I quite low today and that's worrying for my partner too. I flip flop from being accepting of the uncertainty to them being really angry with her. And it's not fair I know that. I think the extreme fear for me comes because we were shiekding for 4 months due to the fact that I'm immunosuppressed, on heany duty medication which suppresses my immune system do to an autoimmune disease and I'm asthmatic . Also my partner is over 50 and over weight and her sister is recovering from chemo therapy so I just have that extra worry I think.

That is really scary as someone who also has big fears around covid. Scoggy really made sense but I struggle with that idea and would understand if you do too. I've never known anyone to wash counters with the same towels you dry your hands with. I grew up in an italian household and on a farm. If we cleared the table to make pasta or pizza, we wiped with paper towel or napkin after disinfectant so that's entirely new to me. I mention farm to say we were all around germs all the time and generally didnt care and we still didn't use hand towels for that. However, we did use hand towels to dry dishes which is something my ocd would hate now. So I suppose that shows where ocd kind of nit picks some of those things. Things I did regularly pre ocd (dry dishes with hand towels) would now be unacceptable with my ocd. So these guys seem pretty reasonable about it all. Something I will do with my hubby when it's all too much for me and I am nagging is just let him know I'm getting overwhelmed, go over the guidelines together for my own sanity, tell him I'm going to trust him here, and then leave the room and not watch him do anything. When I leave and don't see it, I cant nit pick and my brain has nothing to nit pick at. And at the same time I have to trust him because he's the only other person in the house and unless I want to take over the task of grand master maid-disinfecter, I need to let him do some of the house work. I'm really sorry you are going through this. I truly know it is not an easy thing to do with this pandemic.