this lady summed up erp to me as this: imagine a cold deep pool of water. you dip your toe in and take it out because it is freezing. the same is for erp because it is cold at first and we don’t want to jump in (be exposed to our fears). Then, we have had enough of being outside of the pool (suffering from ocd) and decide to jump in and give it a shot (start erp). At first it is cold and makes us want to get back out (erp gets worse before it gets better and we want to reassure ourselves). But over time we warm up and get better (the outcome of erp).

do the thoughts feel more real without compulsions

@Anonymous Yes they feel extremely frightening in the moment. But eventually I forget all about it.

@charleejadeg are you doing therapy

@Anonymous I will say they never feel “real”, they only feel closer to home because there’s nothing there to reassure me. And they just feel more emotionally charged. But I still recognize that they are irrational, like always. And then I just have to sit in no reassurance for hours. It’s not fun I won’t lie, it feels like tough love on yourself. But I’m trusting that with time it’ll pass.

@Anonymous Yes I’m 6 weeks in, getting better in some aspects, worse in others but that’s okay.

@charleejadeg what do you mean worse in others? are you doing treatment on here?

@Anonymous Yes doing treatment on here. I actually lost a lot of obsessions within 6 weeks, but the thing that got worse is that I also have panic disorder so my frequency in panic attacks has gone up due to no assurance/no compulsions to aid in security feelings and also because my triggers are becoming more related to trauma. At first they seemed like random obsessions but as I go deeper into ERP my therapist and I are realizing they’re actually closely related to my ptsd so, with delving into that I’m bound to feel some emotions that I don’t want to in order to deal with things I never properly allowed myself to process.

@charleejadeg It’s all a process, and all ERP makes it get worse before it’s better.

@charleejadeg that makes sense. thank you for responding. i don’t really know what to do because i have had a therapist for a while. before these thoughts started happening. i told her about them and she decided she wants me to snap my wrist everytime i have them and say, “stop! these are just thoughts.” do you think this will help? i really don’t know what to do

@Anonymous I actually read some articles about how that may be harmful to people with ocd. I’d ask your therapist about it, is she trained in ocd treatment?

@charleejadeg By harmful I mean, it may develop into a compulsion. Saying “no/stop” to the thoughts is actually what feeds the fear. You must just accept that they exist and do nothing about them.

@charleejadeg she is not. i brought up the possibility of ocd and she shook it off

@Anonymous I recommend trying the diagnosis session on here. It’s only $123 and you get to find out if it’s OCD, or what other possible disorders it could be. I don’t know if you do have OCD, as I am not a therapist, so I highly recommend seeking diagnosis first before you begin any treatment. With OCD, the right treatment/therapy is crucial.

@charleejadeg i’m just really scared they are going to tell me it’s because i am in denial. but i don’t want to be with girls. i literally don’t get this and i hope i’m not triggering you or anything. do they require insurance for the diagnosis?

@Anonymous No they don’t require insurance, the $123 is actually without insurance. So if you have it, it’ll probably be cheaper. Also no one is going to tell you you’re in denial, I mean my therapist on here is amazing, and is the absolute best on educating me on OCD and everything of the sorts. I wish I could assure you that you’re not in “denial”, but that would be “assurance seeking” and it actually makes ocd worse. I will tell you that many people suffer that same theme, and don’t worry, the “in denial” thoughts are simply just obsessions. A quick tip from me to you is to try to just let go of control of your thoughts, the intensity will go down severely.

@charleejadeg thank you!!

@Anonymous Of course! I’m glad I could help.