So Im trying to figure something out cuz I've been having dreams and starting to feel uncomfortable around my dad again I'm 22 and I have two kids and we had to move back in to get me back on my feet while going through a divorce. And when I was younger I was molested by my brother and ugh don't even get me started on the whole them favoring him and not me the entire time me turning into the black sheep whore etc. Anyways okay so my half sister on my dad's side has documentation that she was molested and when it was held against my dad in court by her mom she told him he had to resign custody of her and he claims that it was one of his ex wife's friends who did it and not him but my aunt also claims that my dad had messed with her because she's younger than him. My other aunt says she's crazy and that Kayleena is crazy but also told my cousin that what happened to me didn't actually happen too so I'm wondering if this entire time she's just been sticking up for him but I still don't understand why she would....but right now I'm starting to become concerned about my two girls being around him because growing up I've always been uncomfortable around him and my mom's always been uncomfortable with me being alone with him especially cuz I was clingy and wanted her more anyways. But since moving back I started having dreams and some memories have been unlocked for me and I'm wondering if he touched me and my brother and that's why my brother molested me or what....idk...it's hard to say..I'm just trying to heal from this and ofcourse trying to get back on my feet asap. Doing everything in my power for my mom to be the only one alone with them I 100% trust my mom except that she is severely emotionally abused by him because he is so ridiculously controlling. Also about my sister, she has kids now and he absolutely refuses to have anything to do with her...and it just doesn't make sense why any father wouldn't fight for their right to be with their child even if they could go to jail but the thing is..I know that as a mother myself I would fight so hard to be able to have rights to my kids. It all just doesn't make sense why would he jump ship ya know and why is it that I was also molested but by my brother all these things are just adding up too much ontop of the fact that my mom literally just feels stuck with him because she doesn't believe in divorce (christian) so she's been with him for 30 years but she sleeps in her own room because she can't stand him. She tolerates him because she has to. Idk. But when I was younger my mom also was super adamant that I had to lock the doors whenever I was changing or in the shower because my mom said that my dad and brother absolutely should not come in there....ugh don't even get me started on the whole situation with my brother. I wasn't allowed to go to therapy because get this, if they knew my situation they'd put him my mom and dad in jail and remove me from the home. And my mom said I absolutely would not be able to do that and that my brother is pure now that he's been saved at the altar. And apparently I brought a sexual demon in the house but it's gone now because they cleansed with anointing oil.. anyways just trying to figure out if this is in my head or not regardless I'm still being way over protective of my kids about this because well, it happened to me just not 100% sure if it stemmed from him first

Date posted: 4y

Hi. Sierra. Sorry about this struggle You might’ve mentioned this already, but what makes you think there’s a sexual demon in your house?

sierrapanda

Date posted: 4y

Lol I dont my parents did back when I was 13

Date posted: 4y

Ok, Do you think keeping your children away from your dad is a compulsion?

sierrapanda

Date posted: 4y

I'm not sure. I can't tell but the thing is...it's very likely he did do something to me considering my sister has documentation of him residing his rights to her because of accusations that he molested her.

Date posted: 4y

Ok, how well do you know your dad? Does he shows traits of doing those things now?

sierrapanda

Date posted: 4y

Well I personally refuse for him to be alone with my kids because I've always felt uncomfortable around him just to be safe

sierrapanda

Date posted: 4y

I have some memories that are coming up that are of us showering together when I was young and sitting on his lap that just feel weird for me it's hard cuz I'm pretty sure I'm disassociating from my past memories

Date posted: 4y

I understand. You know him well than me so that’s your call. One thing I would do though is to look at the relationship between your kids and your dad, even if they aren’t alone. Also, if you can just observe what your dad is like now. If he shows traits of that behavior now than you have every right to keep your child away from him. I say this because it’s possible for some people to change and genuinely want a solid relationship with no ill intentions. So I would look at how he acts

sierrapanda

Date posted: 4y

Okay if a murderer asked to spend the night with you would you just assume they've changed?

sierrapanda

Date posted: 4y

@sierrapanda I refuse to let my kids around my brother who I know for sure messed with me for 7 years

Date posted: 4y

@sierrapanda Ok, your call. Wish you the best

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