Any ERP questions you guys need answering? ☺️

You don’t ignore it, you acknowledge it! Say “I felt something down there by looking at this girl” or whatever the scenario is. Then you carry on, not trying to find meaning, or checking again to make sure you aren’t attracted.

@🐝 Yea I totally getcha! Start slow, with just saying the phrase to yourself, and after you get comfortable with that, slowly move on to trying to just not give a flip!

@JustRob That's very difficult to do say if if I'm watching porn and some dude's junk comes on screen (either an ad or watching straight porn). I stay away from porn as a result.

@Jbm421 I don’t watch porn (I’m only 14 and I find it kinda gross), but I cackled at the fact that there’s ads for that... 😂

@JustRob You are 14??? How can you be so wise and brave at 14? Respect to you. You will accomplish big things. 🙂

How do I practice erp with this to alleviate the guilt

@whatifs 1) don’t confess- that’s the worst thing you could to in that scenario 2) tell yourself that “maybe this lie will ruin my reputation. That’s ok.” For ERP. Good luck!

@JustRob Even tho the harmless lie was told to him to protect my self esteem from embarrassment

I am on the same boat. I didn't want to do erp but literally my compulsions didn't reduce anxiety any more. I ran out of arguments to debate with ocd so I decided to try a different approach (erp) and erp has been way better than doing compulsions.

@Sunflower 1234 It’s the worst. I’m so glad to hear that it’s going well for you! It gives me confidence. Did you find it difficult at first?

@mallorycg4 Yes. The first three weeks were the worst I have ever felt. I almost stopped erp. But thank God I kept going and I am in a better place now. I didn't work with a therapist and tried to stop all compulsions at once which was a bad idea. You might have a better experience if you work with a therapist.

@Sunflower 1234 That’s my hope, I’m too afraid to go it alone. Do you still experience the intrusive thoughts?

@mallorycg4 Yes but less often than before and the intensity of the anxiety is lower. I am not quite recovered. I know how to handle them better now.

@mallorycg4 Also I don't avoid anything like I used to.

@Sunflower 1234 That’s great progress! When did you start therapy?

I am recovered ☺️ I used to feel sad for having ocd ALL THE TIME! I’d get some tea or Starbucks, take a joyride, do some self care, or have an ERP/Shadow Work session with myself so I can feel accomplished mentally!

@JustRob How long did you do erp before you recovered? I have done it for 2.5 months. And I am better but still have bad days.

@Sunflower 1234 I started... September or the month before! And I had very severe OCD, my compulsions would take up 3-5 hours per day.

@JustRob Wow you recovered fast. Did you do like intense erp? Did you work with a therapist? What are your themes?

@Sunflower 1234 Haha, a lot of people tell me that! I worked by myself! I had sexual orientation OCD as my biggest theme. Intense? My obsessions were intense, so letting them come and go was pretty intense, especially having thoughts 3-5 hours per day- that’s a lot of Erp for me 😅

Hello! 1) intrusive thoughts automatically count as exposure as long as you don’t respond to them with a compulsion. Thinking about naked men while doing work can also be an exposure! 2) you’re mind is reprogrammed with the RP part, response prevention. Acknowledge you are having a thought, and move on. Don’t do compulsions, accept the uncertainty. Your brain, after sitting with the anxiety, will not being afraid of the thoughts, and it will learn to recategorize thoughts as just thoughts, and slowly it will learn to not conjure up the thoughts. No worries ✨

@JustRob Thank you so much Rob ^_^ It make me have more questions: 3. I understand my anxiety is uncertainty. But it feel more real rather mean uncertainty itself, so instead, my brain tell me it means disgust/bad/wrong and rational. So it is better to say it uncertaint or just stop competing with it and just say yeah it is disgusted, my life is disgusted and i'm okay with it. Because i'm like more care about meaning i give instead of emotion or anxiety. What do you this best for it? 4. Another question i ever watch theraphyst video on youtube ocd specialist (Mark Freeman) that said browsing/searching self help materials also means compulsion. Is this true? Or i just not understand what he means. Thank you ^_^

@Sandy6 3) I personally do both! Try accepting uncertainty first. The anxiety is a sign of uncertainty, sit with it. “The anxiety is a sign of uncertainty, it could happen, and I’m ok with that.” But if seeing it from absolute truth is easier, there’s no problem with doing that first! They’re both really helpful for ERP, just start with the one you think is easiest! 4) I feel like he either got that wrong, or you misunderstood? Self help battles OCD, and it’s definitely not a compulsion as long as you use it to get better! I really like your questions ☺️

@JustRob Yes Rob, it help me so much. On my nearby place, even both my psychologist and psychiatrist are not too specialize with ocd. But they can support me and i get better time after time. And i keep talk to them about erp thought they dont really understand well. Before this (some years ago) i made mistake, instead i using scientific approach i mean ERP, i doing reassurance like asking from spiritual perspective or even said that i'm just person having bad life and not ocd. I have dream become entrepreneur, and i afraid that my whole career and life become disgusted. I even dont understand, i think obsession is just intrunsive thought like images words urges etc. But through learning i understand that my obsession is more about the law itself. I mean the my own law that i'm obsess with becoming having disgusted life. And it is hostage me. 5. Do you agree with that, so this is my obsession? So basicly i trying so hard to recover, i still new download this app. And found that this app is great especially on fast fesponse community. This is my first post here. But i will consider about cost if i interested with online theraphyst. Coz i have financial problem too as 24yo. So, basicly i am trying and working, if intrunsive thought means also exposure. What i'm doing now is use ERP as i can. Coz my psychoghist mostly focus on cbt and psychiatrist keep give me SSRI and help little. But i keep ask help and telling them about erp and they do best they can to help me. But when i try by myself ERP again and again, it very effective. Althought just from learning from books journal youtube community etc, thought i know if better with specialist but i just do as much i can to recover. ;) You know because this obsession, make me compulsion walking forward and back, and doing anything like clicking mouse for hours. So i cant do anything and almost kill myself at that day. Because it ruined my whole days in years. Like compulsion for 10+hours a day. I have this symptoms since 9 yo, got worsen in last 2 years, throught now really distract my life. but diagnose in last 3 month after very severe and i cant live so i find help. The themes is religious, contamination, magical thinking, but now and i think the most worst is about morality that i talked about. 6. If i keep doing ERP as much i can it really make progress right? Can u give me tips or suggestion or even free resources how my practice will be better to manage ocd with ERP thought i'm in difficult situation? Basicly NOCD really great. I just found now. I am really glad. :) Thank you so much Rob. I just remember your username on myocd community maybe. You know i do lot of research, it is like my whole life right now only focus about recovery and living my life. :)

@Sandy6 First off, if they don’t understand ERP, they can’t help you with significant improvement with your OCD- but it’s nice they support you! Ooh yea science is always good for OCD, rather than spiritual means. Spiritual things can still encourage and give you hope, but won’t actively change much. Obsessions are a main fear you think might happen, and you truly don’t want it to. The idea that you are obsessing that your life is ruined and disgusting and can never happen could be an obsession, as long as there is a compulsion, which you have- so that is def your obsession and you have physical compulsions. And you’re diagnosed. I urge you to try to find a therapist who specializes in ERP- CBT includes ERP since it’s a branch of CBT, but if they’re not mastered, they can’t do much. SSRIs help as well, I’m def sure! ERP is super effective, like it’s a total game changer! Yes, it can really change life. For mindfulness, Smiling Minds help. For podcasts, The OCD Stories is REALLY useful, The Dare App for anxiety, and try treating yourself with a small candy everytime you don’t do compulsions- it may help reinforce your brain. I’ll come back to you for more resources once I gather them, I’m in the car rn though so when I’m home :)) self care is also a biggie! I totally understand you, and I admire your dedication. I’m so sorry you have to go through this, your life seems really tough right now- but I have so much hope for you! You can do this!

@JustRob Yes, thank so much. It helped me a lot. I bookmark all of this. I think is difficult to me to find specialist. But yes, i never give up. I will try as i can and do whatever i can go! I think keep going is my answer now. Your words is amazing and all your references. The good news is i recently get better and better though little by little. I even can do my work/activity more again. When my ocd say no, i say yes. And not doing compulsion as much i can. And this app i think is very effective, i will keep going and practicing or even keep asking on this app if necessary to help my journey. Thank you so much again. Love you Rob <3

@Sandy6 No problem! Keep going and keep trying! We all have faith in you and I trust that you won’t stop until you find your healing. Awww, thanks so much! Ily too Sandy ❤️

Are you doing erp on you own? I have done ERP on my own for 2 months

@Sunflower 1234 I have a therapist, but it’s not on a very regular basis

1) write things that triggered you in the past 2) which ones triggered ya the worst? Which ones made you do a compulsion? Order those from the easiest, from the worst. There shouldn’t be overestimation, since these are things that happened in the past and are certain, and go with what feels comfortable!

@JustRob Awesome, thank you!

You accept it. The more you concentrate on it, the more it’ll grow. If you feel like you enjoy them, you enjoy them- even if that isn’t true, just accept the uncertainty.

@JustRob But what if I don’t want to enjoy the thought and don’t want to think about it

@anonynon Then OCD will use it against you. Accept uncertainty and say you were attracted, and don’t stop thoughts.

How do you live through the discomfort, again? It just seems so impossible.

@silverfire Try distraction or mindfulness, and meditation to work on letting go. Or sit with the anxiety and try to maximize it- often, OCD gives up when we work with it and try to enlarge it!

@JustRob I think you said it often took a week to get past discomfort of it at first? Just...how do you even? I can’t seem to outlast it. I don’t know if I’m just not being taught mindfulness and meditation well or if I just can’t do them. I just don’t feel like I get it, no matter how much it’s explained to me. I’ve never been a good listener tbh. I’m a very hands and visual on learner. I don’t get stuff unless I’m walked through it. Therapists don’t do that either. They’re talkers. I just feel so out of options. I’m on my fourth therapist here and the NOCD one isn’t exactly sitting in hero land for me at the moment. I’m a difficult patient or I’m thick, or something.

@silverfire Usually the discomfort faded away on its own and solved itself. I understand you. You could try journaling about the discomfort, and maybe that would release any anxious feelings?

@silverfire Did any of those 4 therapists give you a reason why you are not improving? Are there mental compulsions you are still doing? Sometimes ocd compulsions are subtle and hard to recognize.

@JustRob I guess what I’m trying to say is I literally can’t go a whole week without doing the associated compulsion. It seems OCD waits around forever for me to give in. As long as I do it, and it doesn’t matter how long, OCD waits as long as necessary, I lose.

@Sunflower 1234 The therapists seem to all be breaking down at how I can handle the discomfort. I can’t seem to outlast the discomfort. OCD waits as long as necessary. And I just can’t stand the discomfort. I keep trying but I’m not developing the needed coping mechanisms to do it. I guess.

@Sunflower 1234 I’m mean I’m basically at the point where I just feel like I just can’t do it.

@silverfire What’s your compulsion, if I may ask?

@JustRob Avoidance and sanitization. Added complication: I’m pregnant so I have more reason to do these things. Being pregnant means you fall under the category of “immunocompromized”. I want to keep myself and my baby safe. I feel very vulnerable all the time.

@silverfire Aw sorry to hear. How long have you had ocd? My OCD spiked every time I have a child. I made a loop tapes saying how much ocd has destroyed my life and how doing a compulsion would worsen my condition. I listen to it when I am tempted to do compulsions. I ask my husband to keep my accountable and not do compulsions too. Sounds like you have contamination ocd.

@Sunflower 1234 I do yeah. I’ve had various themes for about 8 years in various intensities. Sometimes I have a few themes running at once. This is the worst it’s been in awhile. With contamination OCD I just can’t seem to convince myself to do or not to do these things. It feels sooo unsafe. I can’t logic with myself. It doesn’t feel worth the risk. I’m at a loss.

@Sunflower 1234 The worst moments come at a surprise. Stuff that catches me off guard.

@silverfire Ugh I am sorry to hear. It is hard to have ocd while being pregnant. 😔 Can you at least delay your compulsions? Anything helps.

@Sunflower 1234 It’s hard yeah. I mean, my husband and I were planning to have a fun evening putting together the baby dresser. An incident at the store when we went to get a couple things ruined the evening. I can delay some compulsions (when I’m not having a total meltdown) but it really seems to just be putting it off. It doesn’t seem to bring down the intensity.

I was less nervous, more like “CRAP IM SO DONE WITH THIS-“ haha! And I’m so glad- you can do it! I hope it goes well!

That’s still wonderful progress. I’ve had my OCD for about a year and a half, initially didn’t even know it was OCD. I’m hoping ERP can help me feel more like myself. It’s been so hard dealing with it especially since I just got married and love my husband so much. But I’m trying to stay determined that I can get better. People like you give me hope.

@mallorycg4 It was unbearable before erp to be honest. I still have hard days but nothing compared to before. I used to think life was not worth living when it was really bad. A lot of crying. I am so thankful how far I have come. You will get better too. Erp is the answer. It will get worse before it gets better. But stick with erp.

@mallorycg4 Congrats on getting married. I have been married for 8 years.

@Sunflower 1234 Congratulations on 8 years! That’s wonderful. I’m definitely not going to give up, im so tired of being tired of this. What is your main OCD theme that you struggle with?

I usually define it myself as being certain about my obsession while also being ok accepting uncertainty. To me, recovery is like being ok. I can never forget I had ocd because of NOCD and the people I help out, but there are moments where I’ll forget that. I don’t have a lot of anxiety about it. Everything is chill, imo.