- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
I feel the same but I haven’t experienced it for as long as you. I’m 15 now and I’m terrified that my entire life is going to be like this. I don’t know if I can cope if I’m stuck with this forever. I had so much to look forward to in life and now I feel like everything’s been ruined and is now pointless
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- 4y
Sorry that wasn’t helpful but it was kinda nice to relate to someone a little. I hope you’re ok.
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- 4y
That’s okay xx because you’re so young I would say try and do everything to get the help you need now and make sure you always have a community of people who support you. You should be okay x
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- 4y
I get what you're saying about losing a lot of your life to mental illness. I often feel the same way. Let me just say though that 28 is still young and you have lots of time to meet some goals in life. I don't know if anyone accomplishes everything they want to. I'm 44 and have lost things to OCD and anxiety, but I also have lots of good things in my life. I guess one idea might be to focus on what you're grateful for. It often helps me.
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- 4y
Can anyone share their experiences with this and any advice please? X
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- 4y
I had Hocd as my first ever like theme when I was 15 as well I had it all sophomore year and recently got it back 1 year of college it’s been 4 months since and it’s been difficult. These false memories are still there but just try to do your best to not do any compulsion and it’ll help. I’m 19 now btw, everyone has their own journey and I’m sorry that yours is lasting this long. Don’t stop fighting. You got this !
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- 4y
Im 29 and have been sick since 12. And yes I have a lot of grief for missing out on life. On parties. On love. On friendship. I have lost a lot. But now I also have hope. Hope that I can GET life back. The years I missed will never come back, but maybe I can learn to be mindfully present here and now and be satisfied with that. I will learn to let myself grieve the years I lost. I just got confrontation that I'll get my first appointment with an OCD specialist within 6 weeks so im so hopeful! It is sad that we have missed out on life. Let yourself be sad. When Im able to grief, truly, after all the tears suddenly I feel present and good about something else! ❤
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- 4y
Thank you for this and I’m sorry for your suffering. I hope your appointment goes well 💛
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- 4y
@freedomproject Thank you! Actually I also realized some of the thinking about "life never gets easier, i have lost so much" is actually OCD. Intrusive thoughts making me do compulsions. I let myself grieve, but with the feelings, crying, letting it out. While I try to identify the times its just another way of OCD making me hate existence. Dont know if this might apply to you? I mean we definitely have something to grieve, (we have lost years of our lives! Been traumatised!)but sometimes its not grieving its ocd masquerading as grief.
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- 4y
@asdfghj I often wonder about this. I find it hard to tell the difference between ocd and real feelings. I’ve especially been struggling lately.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 25w
I can't stop thinking about ending my life. I feel like I'm not even living, I'm just surviving. Everyone is capable of being a person and functioning and I'm just stuck here avoiding everything. My psychiatrist said my ocd is severe and it will all take time and I'll start erp and I'm already on medication but I just feel so depressed and like I won't be able to handle erp and it's already too late for me. I feel inhuman, it's debilitating. My major theme is just fear or contamination, I can't even make myself a meal I can't touch anything in the kitchen. I get stuck in the shower for 2 hours and when I don't shower because I'm depressed I feel like a walking germ. My hands are a mess, my school work is shit, I avoid and avoid and I'm just so tired of "living" like this. My psychiatrist said they don't have any therapists available right now like.... excuse me? What do you mean u don't have any 😭 I honestly don't even know why I'm typing this becuase nothing helps, nothing ever will. I'm so deep into this I can't get out, my room looks like shit, I can't live in this body anymore, I really can't. I let everyone down, I am and will be such a dissapointment. I don't have any dreams or goals or passions I just wasn't made to be here. I don't know how or who to ask for help like there's nothing anyone can do, I'm already on meds. I can't keep being like this, seeing everyone judge me for acting insane.
- Date posted
- 19w
17f Just like the title says. I came to realization that I lost a whole year of life. I remembered my real event in the end of january of 2024. Since then my life has been a living hell. Also kinda made a couple new smaller events through this year. And I know I deserve it cause my event was actually bad. Even people without ocd on reddit agree it was bad. It's still ocd, but I deserve it probably. For this whole year I haven't had a day when I wouldn't think of it. It became my default state to constantly have it on my mind. I walked around, pretended to have fun, talked to people. Most of the time I wasn't really there, I was thinking about my event. My event haunts me when I'm awake, when I'm asleep. I spend this whole year either freaking out, being depressed, thinking on methods to off myself, ruminating, seeking reassurance or trying to distract myself with books, TV shows, social media or daydreaming. Literally barely engaged with reality. So it's so hard to believe a whole year passed... I can barely remember anything that happened during this year. I can't believe this is my life. Probably doesn't really matter cause I don't plan on staying there that long. There is no way I'm going to experience piece with myself. So I will be out in a year or so, since my plan requires some time. Finally will end it all. It just feels very weird. A whole year passed. I was so deep down in my head I didn't even notice. It's scary.
- Date posted
- 19w
I'm going through a rough time. I used to think medication would brighten my world, but if anything, it's muted it. The physical anxiety is less, and I felt okay(ish) for a while, but things are getting bad again. I'm so afraid I'll never get to a point where I feel safe in my body and in my mind. Today is the first day I've cried in... I don't know how long. But I didn't feel the relief I thought I would. Initially, I did, but it morphed into dread, and now I'm sitting by myself, trying not to panic. I really want to begin seeing a therapist for OCD, but I don't know how much my insurance covers. There's just so much on my mind right now. A whole bunch of old themes are resurfacing. I wish I could've been given a different path in life. I'm trying to stay strong. It's just really difficult. I feel like I'm being sent back to square one :(
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