So im at the stage where this is telling me what i want. And im starting to believe this. I just dont know whats reality anymore. I feel like im just going to live in pain and misery for the rest of my life 😥

Same, I can't tell anymore, plus I feel like I'm not even freaking out as much as a should. It's not even anxiety anymore it's just annoying and frustrating.

My brain is clouded telling i want to be with a man i feel like my life is over. I dont want that 😥

I know how it feels, I have suffered from it before, but now I'm in a good relationship with my boyfriend ( I'm a girl) and I'm really happy, so it does go you just need to keep going

But things have got so bad last 3 and a half months. My brain just wont let me rest. And i have a negative feeling towards women and there gentials i hate it this

This is true. But then my mind gets carried away 😞

yeah and it will keep doing this until you actually put the ERP methods into place

And my mind tells i dont like pussy if i try and think about it 😞. I have never been down on a girl and thought i dont like it

are you in the mindset of wanting to get better or are u just kind of accepting that it is part of life now?

I want to get better of course i would do anything not to be going through this 😞

are u in that mindset tho? because unless you're in the getting better mindset you wont get better, sure therapy and medication help but they dont fix the problem the only person who can do that is you and it's not gonna be a quick fix and it will be hard but if you do it you will be so much stronger for it and will finally be able to lead a happy life

instead of reacting in your usual way to the thoughts you dont want, try not to show any distress, because then your ocd doesnt have the anxiety and doubt to feed off of, maybe start writing down your thoughts and say how it made you feel then confront it-but accepting the thought and almost agreeing with it for example for rocd the thought would be 'you dont love your partner' then to confront it you would say'yeah I dont love my partner so what' even tho that's not the truth and then that lessens the anxiety and tells ur brain that u arent afraid of that thought

I was just on porn and saw a penis and said thats a nice one do frustrating

Should i stay away from porn ?

yeah cuz that will be a major trigger for you and the type [f ocd u have

I’m sorry to hear that. Keep doing your erp exercises and things will get better soon. There is light at the end of the tunnel. You can do this. We can get through this together and we are all here for you.

I dont get much anxeity either i just cry everyday. My life feels ruined and i keep on thinking of being with a man. And i keep saying stuff in my head. Like thats the kind of man i would go for ? Could this be ocd ?

Can it do that like twist my feelings and thoughts ?

I dont know what erp exercises to do ?

that's what pure o does, it manipulates your brain til after a while you've had it so long that u start believing them, I promise you that they arent true, even tho that wont be much help but just keep fighting because it will pass :)

Ive had this going on for 16 years now things are just awful. I just want this gone

how old are you if you dont mind me asking? and have you tried ERP and cbt?

Im 37 im doing cbt not sure what to do for erp ?

are u married or in a relationship right now?

Yeah i have a gf and 2 boys

sounds like you're trying too hard to feel something, take the pressure off yourself

Yeah and i think ive made it worse. I think im worried this isnt ocd 😞

I keep thinking maybe im bi but when i actually think of doing something with a man it grosses me out. Ive only got to look at a guy and even really see them properly and my mind is like oh god would you look at him hes fit nice legs etc

theres a difference between thinking a person of the same gender is attractive and then actually fancying them, I think that your ocd is merging the two together, you can look at someone and find them good looking and not wanna sleep with them, it's normal your ocd is just blurring the lines and you said it yourself the thought of doing anything with a guy grosses you out

I think i just have to realise its ocd tricking me. I seem to have men on my mind constantly it cant be normal ?

Thats what i hope for but i know its not possible. Ive said in my mind this has been a long time coming thinngs like that 😞. It tells me i dont like womens bits when i do i get an eww in my mind and a feeling in my stomach

it sounds silly and obvious but the way to get better is to accept the thoughts and not react, exposure to your fears will help you realise that this is all just ocd

Im trying at the moment just saying to myself its just ocd. My brain still trying to scan through men. And i find i comment like hes to die for wtf ? 😞

I just thought of some gay guy and said to myself hes fit. Does ocd do this ?

Isnt that avoidance tho ?. Also what kind of feelings did you have etc ?