Been suffering with HOCD as my dominant theme for over a year, one of the most difficult things to deal with is when I'm around others, I constantly have these intrusive thoughts pop up "You're gay" "just tell them you're gay" "tell them, they will understand" "you're just in denial". Also, at times, i get this incrediblely strong urge to just scream "I'm gay", it feels extremely overwhelming and unbearable. It's extremely difficult and exhausting, in general before OCD, I've always known I'm Bi-Sexual and I've accepted that however I've never been sexual with anyone from the Same Sex, but I know i never exclusively gay, all of a sudden OCD is convincing me I'm in denial. Anyone else suffer the same or similar symptoms?

Yes OMG in exactly the same ? I always thought I was straight but recently accepted that I could be bisexual. However this Hocd is trying to convince me I’m only attracted to women. I hate it coz I’ve always been attracted to men. It’s exhausting. I get the urges aswell they are the worst coz they feel so real and uncontrollable :/

I feel the pain in your message..... It is exhausting, I've been in recovery for around 6 months, symptoms have definitely decreased however the lingering doubts are constantly there, annoying and painful, just want to be able to be in a meaningful happy relationship, omg!!!

Yes, its so FRUSTRATING! I'm starting to actually doubt my sexuality, that maybe I am only attracted to the same sex, lately I haven't been finding women attractive, I feel very awkward around them, and all I notice is the males, I look at them solely which is strange because this was not the case around one year ago before OCD struck. I don't even know anymore.... I'm trying to accept the uncertainty however I'm frightened that maybe I am actually exclusively attracted to the same sex.

Same problem! It’s so nice to finally meet another bi person with the same issue!

@Pink Dinosaur Yes, I was afraid I was just in denial for such a long time hence why I didn't seek treatment, because usually those who have HOCD tend to be entirely straight and they fear become homosexual. Whereas I was Bi prior to OCD, now it's convincing me I'm entirely gay and just in denial.

Does your ocd try to convince you your only attracted to one gender ?

@AhmedH Me too! Sometimes it tries to tell me that I’m 100% straight and that I’m just taking resources away from actual LGBT people. :/ I feel as if bisexuality already comes with a certain element of confusion, OCD just makes it worse.

The thing with me is even though I know I am attracted to both genders (prior to OCD), I made a rational decision not act upon my Homosexual desires due to personal reasons (not homophobic). However since OCD I am constantly feeling strong urges, impulses, aggressive thoughts that I have to come out to the world and start being with the same sex, sometimes it feels I am being forced to do something deep down I know I have no desire to do so.