Anyone here suffer from Racism OCD?

Sure. Up until recently did I get intrusive thoughts about black people. ... And months ago, like MONTHS, about Muslims. You?

@cheesecakehero I think it’s a little towards general POC and especially Mexican people. My OCD sometimes makes me feel disgusted for no reason

@Madison Can a racist person stop being racist?

@cheesecakehero That’s exactly it. The fact that we are disturbed by these thoughts and we know that they’re wrong. That PROVES that we aren’t actaully racist, it shows that it’s OCD. Because we want to be different because we acknowledge it’s wrong. Actaul bad people don’t realize what they’re doing is wrong. Actaul racist people don’t think they’re racist. Does this make sense?

@Madison I guess... But I do question it. Maybe because all of my inner turmoil do I look down upon others. I have so much in my mind from 2014 to now. The abuse trauma from my abusive sister and her husband, tornado phobia/trauma, borderline traits, thinking what if I have c-ptsd?

@Madison I try so hard to be perfect that it becomes stressful

@Madison Because I hate the idea of being hated and not loved

@cheesecakehero I know. The scariest part is coming out and talking about it. Because you know most people would not understand that it’s your ocd and not you. But once you do talk about it you see that there are people here that understand and support you. I started getting POCD this summer and I didn’t tell anyone it scared the living hell out of me and controlled my every move I thought about ending my life. I didn’t and I’m working everyday. Part of that fear of having ptsd could be your ocd and faulse memories.

@Madison I have pocd and last year, around the last 3 or 4 months of last year, I looked into getting castrated, chemically and or physically so I wouldn't have the tools to hurt a child. I even had thoughts of killing myself by putting a bullet through my head. Thinking a monster such as I don't deserve to live.

@Madison I no longer think that.

@cheesecakehero I really wanted not to live anymore. It came out of nowhere. Since I finally talked to my therapist and family about it, and I realized they didn’t think I was a bad person and they didn’t send me away somewhere, I’ve gotten better. But it still disturbs me and I still have OCD over it. This lit started because someone made a joke about pedophiles and for some reason it just freaked me out. I’m always scared that something happened to me when I was a kid, but that’s just my ocd

@Madison For me my pocd started because of intrusive thoughts I was getting of my oldest niece. Unfortunately I was kicked out of the house because I yelled at my sister if it hurts her so much than why doesn't she kill me?! Her husband than assaulted me by beating me upside the head. My sister sat on the couch not even trying to get him off me. Just said babe stop baby no.

@Madison He also placed a long ass knife object in feet of me, her husband, saying if I want to kill myself go ahead but do it off of this lot no in his house because he will not be held responsible for what I do to myself

@Madison I hate talking about him and her, it makes me uncomfortable

@cheesecakehero It’s good to talk about it. In the long run it’s better to talk about it. I’m sorry this happened to you. We have OCD because we are such empathetic people, we know we can not control the world so we place every bad thing in ourselves to try to make the world a better place. You’re a good person not bad

@Madison I know. I just wish my sister at least tried to look into what pocd is, instead of ignoring videos I sent here about it, and saying I'm toxic, that she doesn't want me around her kids, and not to come over/be in here life? Basically outing me as a pedophile. I no longer have a sister. I truly believe that her husband brainwashed her.

@Madison The sister I grew up with is dead

@Madison It hurts me so much to not have her in my life but I decided that hey cut her out

@Madison I don't know I validate her by constantly feeling like I have to mention she was molested as a child by our cousin

@cheesecakehero As if that excuses her treatment towards me

I kinda question if I'm racist against Muslims because of how terrorists I often learn about are Muslim. From 9/11 to ISIS.

@soup Probably.

@soup It's when I see a woman wearing a hijab

I have a question about a certain part of the quaran. Aisha. Was she 10 or younger when she married Muhammad? Do Muslims support that? I'm sorry if I'm being rude. :(

@Ness Huh okay

@cheesecakehero btw it’s not islamaphobic to disagree with islam or muslims, only when you attack (to put it simply) someone it becomes islamaphobia

@Ness Okay...

@cheesecakehero I well aren't I an ass? I just assumed every Muslim believes that was ok? *Shrug*

@cheesecakehero don’t worry it’s ok, it’s clear that you are willing to learn and educate yourself!

@Ness How?