I was getting ready to post a question on this site and after I click "Share", a message shows up saying that it is important for us to avoid seeking reassurance and then forcing me to check boxes asking me to promise not to ask for reassurance and some other promises to make. Well how are we supposed to learn anything if we cannot ask questions?? I was trying to get insight from others here about an issue I am having but seems like now I am censored.

I told my OCD group about NOCD and one of the members brought up that this app, despite its intent to create a safe community for sharing OCD experiences could potentially be used for reassurance seeking, thus contributing to compulsions. I’ve noticed some posts about people venting and asking for reassurance and I wonder the same thing.

I’m irrationally terrified of being found somehow by someone who knows me but I’m trying to post anyway. Not sure if I qualify as young adult or mid-life at this point because I’m about to be 30. Hi, I’m new here and I’m in the process of getting a diagnosis. I’m already diagnosed with autism, GAD, and probable ADHD, and I believe I’ve had varying subtypes of OCD since childhood. My worst OCD-related issue right now has been constant reassurance seeking. I’ve fallen into a trap of constantly doing it and without reassurance I’m terrified to make decisions in my new job. It’s causing me to ask too many questions I already know the answers to which makes me not look competent. Even though I’m somewhat experienced in my field of work, starting this new job has me feeling like I’m starting in the field all over again because I’m so bad these days with working independently since I can’t reassure myself that what I’m doing is correct. I’ve been stressed out of my mind and have come close to losing my job because the stress has exacerbated my autistic struggles such as meltdowns and social issues and I’m also battling the ADHD and GAD on top of it. I’ve also been pushing away people who are close to me with my reassurance seeking because I have problems with not being satisfied with any piece of advice or reassurance given to me by friends and family. They can say things will be okay a thousand times and even though I’m the one who asked I will fight them on it and I’m getting tired of my own difficult behavior and obsessive thoughts. I finally got into therapy again to try and save my job and my relationships from the clutches of my various mental illnesses and I’m just looking for community here.

I’ve heard it’s not good to seek reassurance or give it because it lowers your tolerance to uncertainty. But how do I avoid seeking reassurance when my thoughts and doubts are so bad, I genuinely just don’t know anymore if I’m a bad person or if it’s just OCD? I know I’m supposed to sit with the uncertainty, but how can I do that when the uncertainty has me unable to trust my own brain? Especially when the OCD is real event and POCD? How can I not seek reassurance when I feel so alone and so abnormal and just don’t wanna feel that way anymore? In turn, I see so many people on here struggling so bad and my heart breaks for them. How can I give advice to towers without giving them reassurance and hurting them in the long run?