Lately whenever I cry I kinda force myself to. Like I’ll purposely watch sad things or trigger myself with sad content. And me and my OCD are terrified that this is proof I’m a terrible evil person who can’t cry naturally. I cry a lot when my family are mean to me, but the times I make myself cry is watching sad things. It’s because I want to feel human and compassionate.

I’m not endorsing crying though. Don’t trigger yourself to cry. ❤️

@BeachedMermaid Thanks so much. I love crying and it does feel good. But I just feel so anxious when I have to MAKE myself cry :/

@BeachedMermaid And I feel like lately I’m kinda having to force myself to

@garden Please don't feel that way. You shouldn't have to force yourself to cry. That sounds like it could be painful. Do you feel like you are relying on sobbing as a coping mechanism?

@BigGip09 Yes deffo. Crying to me means I’m empathetic and a lot of my OCD fears are about empathy so I need to cry to prove I have it. But I feel so fake and awful for almost actively making myself cry instead of it coming naturally

@garden Ah, jeez. I'm so so sorry to hear that. You're a very sweet person and you are caring of others. The fact that you worry and you feel you have to prove to literally cry shows you have OCD alone. You're not fake and you aren't awful. You can't let OCD make you believe that. And everytime you do force yourself to cry, you're just feeding the OCD just so it'll doubt you again. I know it's confusing and I know it sucks, but you HAVE to refrain from doing such a thing to yourself. You don't deserve that, pal.

@BigGip09 Thank you. That’s so kind. It’s just hard since I’ve been doing it for so long. Like if I don’t try, maybe I’ll never cry again! Me and my OCD are just one person

@garden All emotions are felt at their own times. You should never feel that you have to force an emotion to prove something or to feel it whatsoever. When someone or something saddens you, you'll know. And that goes for all emotions. It's what makes you human!! Your OCD really has you in a lock at the moment but you can reverse that! I believe in you, Garden. :)

@BigGip09 Thank you. You’re very kind :)

@garden You're welcome! Right back at you! :)

Yeah!

Thank you :)

@garden You're welcome! We can get through this day by day. No matter what we will handle things.

@BigGip09 You’re right. I’m just so paralysed by fear these days lol. But we’ve got this. Need to cut down on compulsions 💪