- Username
- garden
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Iām 20 had sex first time when I was 18 because I felt insecure as well. Honestly I wish I was a virgin now.
Iām sorry :( Why do you still wish you were one?
@garden Because I always felt pressured into it I was never comfortable and I let people use and abuse me
@Molly Thatās awful Iām really sorry. You deserved (and still deserve) better
Just do what you want to do . Honestly itās a good thing that your listening to your values and want to focus on career . Iām the same way . I tried to be wild , and watch porn and Iām the same age as you . Worst mistake of my life . Itās good thst youāre like this
Itās okay. Do whatever feels comfortable and right to you. You can take any path you want as long as no one gets hurt in the process. I actually relate a lot. Iām 18 almost 19 and Iāve done nothing. Itās definitely embarrassing being in college with no experience. But everyone moves at their own pace and takes their own path and itās okay. Nothing to be ashamed of. You just need to find yours.
Thank you so much
Ik im not a girl but thatās a good thing if thatās your morals cause when you meet that one guy itās gonna feel 100x more romantic for both of you. I wish I was still a virgin.
I'm the same age as you and I feel the same way. However at 17 you're still very young, there's a whole life ahead of you. Society expects us to do/experience specific things at specific ages, but at the end of the day there's no right time or wrong time. It's all a matter of moments. Some people get in serious relationship at 13 and some others at 40, and cool things is that it doesn't matter. You do you, keep focusing on yourself. Things will get into place :)
Youāre so right
I'm older I'm in my 30s. I can tell you that it's really perfectly fine that you haven't had sex at 17! To be honest, it's good and it's great to wait until you find someone who really cares for and respects you. Take care of yourself and your body. Looking back on my younger years (and I didn't have sex until 18, so glad I waited until then) one thing I wish is that I didn't have relations with so many men!!! Honestly, young men don't understand how to treat women well, and by the time I'm old enough to realize now it's too late. I don't judge myself for being with guys when I was younger, but I sure wish I could go back in time and slap myself into sense and say "have more self respect!" Because you are valuable and deserve to be treated well. All women do.
Thanks so muchš
@garden You're welcome! Society (that is ruled mostly by men) puts this pressure on young girls to be sexual and have sex, because that is what guys want! You don't have to and you 100 percent don't have to feel bad about that :). But I get it, peer pressure when you are younger can be difficult to deal with, so stay strong and know you're worthy.
Thatās interesting. Iāve had better respect shown by younger men my age than with older men. But to be fair, my older men are your younger men. Our generation is a bit more aware so they do better. Older men kinda scare me lol.
@stop. Yep you are right, closer in age are generally more on the level. Older men who try to get with younger women I would avoid. As i get older and are in the same situation I can see that it's not really appropriate for older people to try to be in relationships with people in their teens/early 20s. It's a power imbalance.
@Anonymous I wasnāt really talking about dating. I havenāt dated at all. I was more talking about general respect.
This is ridiculous, now I feel like Iām truly questioning my sexuality. Iām 15. Never had a crush on a girl, donāt think I have. Touched myself to lesbian porn mostly, turned on by sexual images of women but still I never questioned what I felt for boys. I knew I would crush on them, I knew they were feelings. If anything maybe I could be bisexual. But still that doesnāt seem right. Iām just completely lost. Maybe Iām just thinking to much. It shouldnāt be this hard right? I read bisexual people immediately knew. Most of them I think, they realized all their crushes and Fantasies they wanted in real life. I never fantasized about a women, or any girl. I remember crushing on a senior once, I felt excited to see him at school. And fantasized about him. And with my Boyfriend he was just so innocent, and cute and sweet, and when we do sexual stuff I like it. I get uhm .. wet. Sorryyy. I recently got advice to look out for any girl crushes. And Iām really scared about that now. Maybe I can crush on a girl and maybe I canāt. I donāt know anymore. I feel completely unsure of everything. Im not sure if Iām straight or not. I recently started to take quizzes again. I either got straight or bisexual. And idk can anyone give advice? Thanks for reading through all of this if you did.
Anyone struggling with hocd going through this: growing up (18 now) I've never had a boyfriend or even my first kiss. I'm super awkward with that type of stuff for some reason and just don't know why. So any opportunity of having a serious boyfriend I was always uncomfortable and said no. That also had to do with me not liking my body and thinking that a guy would find it super ugly and unlovable. So with that being said I'm afraid I'm a lesbian or bi and like I don't find boys attractive anymore. I'm scared cause I want to be with a guy but I'm afraid I'll never find a guy I want to be with and find out in the long run I'm a lesbian or something. I don't want to be with girls but ocd is kicking me in my ass. Telling me that only girls are attractive, picking apart anything I find attractive on a guy and it makes me sad. Also sorry for the tmi but I'm afraid I won't find a penis attractive and that's that and I'm lesbian. I know I have to accept the unknown but I'm truly terrified cause of my past that it is set that I'm bi or lesbian and just was too stupid to know it.
Does anyone else whoās 20+ and never seriously dated before afraid that this messed up your love life forever? Because I used to look forward to getting to know a guy romantically one day and feeling comfortable enough to let them be around me in that way and now Iām just afraid that if I ever get into a relationship Iām not going to like it and itās just gonna confirm everything Iām afraid of :/
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond