- Username
- maybethistime
- Date posted
- 3y ago
As a member of that community and the OCD community, I understand. I am not at all offended because it is the OCD, not you as a person. Try not to worry about it. I really would let it go! I'm in therapy now for OCD and learning to accept the uncertainty, it takes away the fear!!
It’s okay! It was how you acted with your OCD atm and you’ve recognized it and stopped. Those first heavy stages of having HOCD can make us say things that may come off as offensive towards the LGBTQ community when that is not our intention. Sometimes we need to be more aware of what we are doing when we are constantly asking people for reassurance and aware of how we word ourselves. We also have to consider that a lot of them won’t understand that you have OCD. So what you are asking may come off as weird or something backhanded when it’s just your anxiety and OCD. But they don’t know that. They just see what you are asking them and not your motivations behind them. It’s a good combo of miscommunication on both sides. Your anxiety and need for reassurance probably made you word your questions in ways that offended people though you did not intend to and their lack of understanding about OCD keeps them from understanding why you did what you did. I’m glad you stopped seeking reassurance from them. It’s a good step in the right direction to get better, but don’t beat yourself up about it. You live and you learn.
It’s fine we all seek reassurance . I spammed r/legaladvice when I was scared of getting into legal trouble for random shit
I feel you. I think ocd makes us act out in selfish ways because we’re so worried. It’s not evil of you or us. HOCD is especially hard because at time it can seem really demonising to the LGBTQ+ community. I for one imagine I’ve hurt people too. We just have to consciously make sure our words don’t hurt already marginalised groups. We gotta learn from it, to avoid the potential of any more hurt! Don’t beat yourself up over it. Your ocd hijacked your brain and made you have to do this. And your guilt shows where your heart is. We just all have to be a little more aware at times 💛
[Long im sorry] Hey everyone. I took a break for a while. I made a mistake a week ago and i googled a bunch of things i shouldnt. They worked their way into my ocd and its been harder since it morphed. I have good days and bad, since ive been working out trying to cut down on ruminating and compulsing and working on responding instead of reacting to my intrusive thoughts. I broke down and ritualized twice the other day. I tried being kind to myself since i know im human and it happens. Its just hard because im stubborn. I know my truth but my brain wont accept it and im too stubborn to go along with it to stop the obsessive wheel. It constantly feels like im being dragged against my will. I tried to join the HOCD reddit board but my situation is so unique i dont feel like i belong enough to post, which i think is hurting me the most. My self esteems in the toilet. Why would a gay trans man be afraid that hes a lesbian? I know that its stupid, hypocritical and ridiculous but honestly its been one of my biggest fears in talking about my issues. I feel like such a niche case, despite all my symptoms being spot on and screaming "hocd". Ill try to be kinder to myself today, work with mindfulness, try not to get so wrapped up. Ive just been so depressed over it all and needed to just get it out.
Any tips on not taking other people’s ocd personally?? I’m a lesbian with SOOCD where I obsess over being straight/attracted to men. It’s been beneficial to use this app and look at posts from others with SOOCD because it gives me some perspective. However, it’s uncomfortable to see the fear that people have over the idea of being gay because I already feel like being gay is wrong/gross/scary and my brain takes those posts as “proof” that being gay is wrong so I’m horrible. I know that this is NOT a rational thing to think but my obsession on this topic are so intrusive I just can’t help falling into that train of thought. Essentially. I feel like this app is a double edged sword so I’m unsure of if it’s even worth it to continue looking at it.
I haven’t really had a lot of trouble with my SO-OCD intrusive thoughts for a while, but I just got really triggered by one of my friends. I’m a straight female and I recently discovered the singer Chappell Roan, who sings primarily about LGBTQ+ and lesbian experiences. Listening to her music was a big deal for me because normally that sort of thing would trigger me, but it’s pretty catchy to me and a few of my friends (who happen to be lesbian) thought it was cool and were happy I was into the same music they were into. Well today, I sent them a text that I’ve fallen down the rabbit hole with her music and am starting to watch her interviews, which is something I usually do when I discover a new artist (I tend to hyperfixate on things a lot). After sending this text, one of my friends said “are you sure you’re not gay” which sent me into an intrusive thought spiral. In the past, she’s said I set off her “gaydar” which was also really triggering to me. My brain keeps telling me that if I come off that way, it must mean I’m lying to myself and I’m actually a lesbian. I wanted to tell her that I have SO-OCD and those types of comments trigger me, but I don’t want her to take it as me not being accepting of gay people. I felt like I finally got to a place where I’m confident I’m straight and now my brain is trying to trick me into thinking I’m lying to myself and it really sucks. I’m really just posting this because I don’t feel like anyone in my life would understand what these thoughts even feel like and it’s just awful.
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