I have previously posted on Reddit pages asking for advice about my obsessions I see now it was solely reassurance. what makes me feel worse is I have SOOCD, so I would go to LGBT/lesbian Reddits and ask if I seemed gay. The last time I did this was Thursday. A woman responded saying what I posted was offensive, considering being a lesbian is not at all bad (which I wholeheartedly agree) and asked why I was using their space as confirmation that i was straight. I feel like an Asshole. I came into their community for self-serving issues, which I already knew was wrong as I had deleted posts there before. Women who legitimately struggle with questioning or fears about their safety because of their sexuality do not need to fix my “marriage problems” by telling me I sound straight. I just hate that I get into these moods and do things I know aren’t good. These poor women and others on those pages did not deserve what I posted.

As a member of that community and the OCD community, I understand. I am not at all offended because it is the OCD, not you as a person. Try not to worry about it. I really would let it go! I'm in therapy now for OCD and learning to accept the uncertainty, it takes away the fear!!

It’s okay! It was how you acted with your OCD atm and you’ve recognized it and stopped. Those first heavy stages of having HOCD can make us say things that may come off as offensive towards the LGBTQ community when that is not our intention. Sometimes we need to be more aware of what we are doing when we are constantly asking people for reassurance and aware of how we word ourselves. We also have to consider that a lot of them won’t understand that you have OCD. So what you are asking may come off as weird or something backhanded when it’s just your anxiety and OCD. But they don’t know that. They just see what you are asking them and not your motivations behind them. It’s a good combo of miscommunication on both sides. Your anxiety and need for reassurance probably made you word your questions in ways that offended people though you did not intend to and their lack of understanding about OCD keeps them from understanding why you did what you did. I’m glad you stopped seeking reassurance from them. It’s a good step in the right direction to get better, but don’t beat yourself up about it. You live and you learn.

It’s fine we all seek reassurance . I spammed r/legaladvice when I was scared of getting into legal trouble for random shit

I feel you. I think ocd makes us act out in selfish ways because we’re so worried. It’s not evil of you or us. HOCD is especially hard because at time it can seem really demonising to the LGBTQ+ community. I for one imagine I’ve hurt people too. We just have to consciously make sure our words don’t hurt already marginalised groups. We gotta learn from it, to avoid the potential of any more hurt! Don’t beat yourself up over it. Your ocd hijacked your brain and made you have to do this. And your guilt shows where your heart is. We just all have to be a little more aware at times 💛