i’ve been taking to this girl for a week and she just now told me that shes actually 17 and not 18, but she turns 18 may 3rd. i just turned 19 in october, for context. im in a weird situation now bc i have feelings for her but i feel like a creep or a predator if i act on them. the age of consent where i live is 17 but i feel like a pedophile and i hate it but i really fucking like her and idk what to do.

BigGyro09

Date posted: 4y

You're 19. My age. Having feelings for a girl that's 17 at this age is not a bad thing. It definitely doesn't make you a pedophile either. Pedophilia ranges around children below the age of 13 and only the attraction for children alone. In fact, finding teenagers attractive is normal for the most part. In the same way it's normal to call animals, babies, and children cute.

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

2 years age difference at 17 and 19 is not even remotely problematic. It's not even a full 2 years, but if it was it wouldn't matter. 2 years is insignificant at your current ages and will only grow less so a you both get older. Honestly this doesn't strike me as an OCD thing, this strikes me as a misinformed view on what's an acceptable age difference for dating.

BigGyro09

Date posted: 4y

Sooo freaking true. There's such a problem with society when it comes to what's the right age group and gap to date when it comes to small gaps like these. It shouldn't even be noticable if you ask me. I think it's completely normal

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

@BigGip09 It is completely normal. When I was 13 I had a very close friendship with flirting and romantic undertones with someone who was 15, and then I was 14 and she was 16. When I was 16 I dated someone who was 14, and was intimate with someone who was 16 when I was 18. All situations were similar to this one as there was a close to but not quite 2 hear age gap. I think anyone with a head on their shoulders will think this is fine, and so would most adults. In my experience it's just younger people who will freeze up at small age gaps because they're a bit confused.

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

@Anonymous *close but not quite 2 year

BigGyro09

Date posted: 4y

@Anonymous It can also be a thing where the more you age, the more different it will feel when you view a younger person in comparison to your age. I remember being 15 flirting with many girls older and younger than I was, the oldest being 17 I would say. This is also when I began to sext a lot with girls. But to be honest, it's not bothersome to anyone. It's only a real issue when it's a 30 year old trying to get with a 12 or an 18 year old with a 40 year old in my opinion.

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

Anyway worryqueen, this is an entirely acceptable age range. Enjoy the feelings you have and set aside this guilt, as there's no reason for it.

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

And feel free to act on your feelings c:

thankfullyshort

Date posted: 4y

ive been feeling a lot of the same things too. im 17, about to turn 18 in june, and my girlfriend is 16 and going to turn 17 in a couple days. so we’re only like, seven month apart but i still often feel like a creep or like im grooming her just by being with them. it’s a dumb, irrational thought and it sucks.

BigGyro09

Date posted: 4y

Maybe don't rush into dating yet and stay as friends? You did say it was only a week. Take things slow.

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Share your thoughts so the Community can respond