SOMEONE please respond. I don’t know If this is intrusive thoughts but my sister compared me to a person appearance who is not soo good-looking and I don’t mean this in a rude way. Then later on she started saying she’s joking but my brain already believes her? I’m literally panicking thinking I’m ugly idk what’s wrong with me. I start to believe anything. I’m so insecure about my self already and feel like I look like a catfish cause I use makeup and filters but still its still me right? I hate this what do I do. Idk why I believe her now it’s my brain making me think that way :(

No it’s in my brain omg what if I actually look like her, I don’t want to look like her I thought I was pretty. My brain won’t let me be free? I’m so insecure because of a lot past traumas and shit it won’t let go off me what do I do I’m really scared now. I’m getting sucidal thoughts and all it’s horrible

@Aisha372828 I would try to explore the fear to the fullest extent. Like okay, so if I am ugly, like ugliest thing on the planet, then what? What does that say about me? I'm still human. I'm still talented and worthwhile. I still have friends.

@Aisha372828 Let's poison the thought process of ugly equals unworthy. Who taught you that? Why have you accepted it?

@June Looks matter to me a lot I think sometimes I’m pretty and sometimes I’m ugly and she told me she was joking but still I feel it so quickly a lot of people call me goodlooking and few people put me down so it left a scar on me

@June I don’t want to accept my ex was toxic she use to put me down and because off her I had so many sucidal attempts she use to take ugly mug shots and was like you look like a catfish in your pic. Some other person said I don’t look as good as my pics. Some people call me pretty and I don’t believe them. I was quite ugly in Highschool and changed a lot and I use to hang out with the person my sister compared me with and she doesn’t look good and I don’t wanna sound rude so when she said that I look like her I believed her. My brain started believing her and now I can’t seem to stop thinking about it

@Aisha372828 Abuse is a terrible thing and I'm sorry she's planted terrible thoughts in your head

@Aisha372828 What if you wrote a rebuttal of these thoughts? Start looking for evidence that she's wrong. Maybe then you can believe yourself? I don't know if that helps or just worsens the cycle. Have you tried it before?

I tend to have to ask to for reassurance a lot tbh it sucks without it I can’t seem to like do anything. I’m living in fear. I will start asking my friends do u think I’m pretty. Do you think I look like her I feel horrible idk why my brain making me feel this way

@Aisha372828 Here's the thing, though. If your friends really love you, they won't tell you you're ugly. So you already know the response you are going to get. An honest one might say, "you don't look your best today" but real friends won't nitpick your looks. So there's a weird futility to asking.

I didn’t mean it that way. I have been made feel way cause of my ex always putting me down