18+ So I've finally reached a month in not watching pornography. I am proud of that, but I don't feel so happy as of today. I think I've decided that my next step into getting my psychological health to be at a much better level is to use my phone less and less. I often use my phone to cancel out quite noise. To cancel out my boredom and to pretty much get me out of the present. I often ruminate with and without my phone and I need to do something about this. Last night I didn't sleep the best either. My mind is trying to convince me of things that I can't even get the energy to think of right now. Multiple thoughts crowding each other in my brain at such a speed that I can't even comprehend any of them. I feel like my mind is clouded and foggy and I absolutely cannot think. Occasionally, I've been reading articles that focus on less phone use. All of my problems that I worry about in the past are related to my phone, social media, and excessive use of it, one way or another. I want to find ways to use my phone less, and I feel like I'm developing this new fear of leaving footprints online that will come back to bite me. I'm trying to not let this get to me because I just want to be in the present moment and I just want to stop worrying about.. pretty much everything. I live in fear and it's definitely due to OCD being in my life. So I guess my next goal as of now is to not use my phone so much. That totally means zero use of Instagram as well because now my mind tries to tell me that if I see a celebrity or a professional wrestling diva in a bikini, that's porn, even if I'm not intentionally finding those things, which I'm not. If there's anyone that also has problems with their phone use, maybe we can band together and work on this. Start with smaller goals. For example: See if you can go without your phone for 30 minutes, then an hour, then a day, and then weeks. Slowly build up. This is what I'll be doing. I hope everyone is having a wonderful day/afternoon/evening/night. ❤️

coccorocco

Date posted: 4y

I think that’s a great goal to cut down on phone use. We could all benefit from doing that. Just make sure it doesn’t turn into an avoidance compulsion. Best of luck to you!

BigGyro09

Date posted: 4y

Thanks for everything you've said here! But there's just one thing that confused me and that's avoidance compulsions. How do those work? How do I know I'm avoiding and not distancing from something that could be an addiction?

coccorocco

Date posted: 4y

@BigGip09 I think if you’re using social media excessively, it’s great to cut back and limit the amount of time per day or week you spend on it. However the reasoning should not only be to avoid possible triggers, such as the celebrities in bikinis for example.

BigGyro09

Date posted: 4y

@coccorocco Oh no, it's not because I don't want to see sexual imagery on social media. It's genuinely because I wonder what it's like to live without my phone to see how I feel. So far I've gotten urges but I didn't fall into it until now.

coccorocco

Date posted: 4y

@coccorocco For example... When my ocd first became very severe, I would avoid going out in public as much as possible, because other people triggered my fear that I was going to cheat on or want to leave my fiancé. Now, even when my ocd is really bad, I try to still go out and do things anyway. If someone or something triggers me, I try to use it as an opportunity to do ERP. I hope that makes sense!

coccorocco

Date posted: 4y

@BigGip09 Got it! Then it sounds like you are doing it for the right reasons.

BigGyro09

Date posted: 4y

@coccorocco That definitely makes sense! OCD is what's preventing you from doing something you actually enjoy. With that said, it would be good ERP for you to actually do the opposite of what OCD tells you in that sense. For me, it's kind of the same thing with Pornography. I see both that and phone use as addictive and excessive, meaning I use these things more than I should. I stopped using adult content completely, but now it's time I step away from my phone a bit to see if I can notice further improvements, not to necessarily avoid it because OCD is ruining the fun I have with phones in general. If that makes sense. It's hard for me to argue avoidance when it comes to addictive behaviors. Especially since anything can be addictive, you know?

BigGyro09

Date posted: 4y

TL:DR Worried about phone use as it can lead to stronger symptoms of stress, anxiety, loneliness, low self esteem, and related mental health issues. All of which I talk about to this community and to myself about.

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