- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
I’m in the same situation as you. My anxiety is barely there now, which in hindsight I am thankful for, but now I feel worried as to why I’m not anxious and I’m so doubtful about who I am all while being concerned. It’s just a bundle of negative emotions and confusion on my end. I’m trying to do my higher exposures but I’m worried once I start doing them it will prove they are my desires. What I’m doing personally right now is trying to accept myself unconditionally and accept uncertainty while slowly getting myself to do the exposures. But it’s so hard
- Date posted
- 4y
I know. It really is... wow, so hard and so unfair. But please know, of all the mental illnesses out there this is one of the most unruly and I truly know that the people who suffer from it and at any tough level really are some of the more caring and you will always be ok. But I know that that doesn’t stop the fear. Please chat about it any time because I think it is good for people at same point to take. I hope that is ok any now
- Date posted
- 4y
@PoetART *i hope that is okay anyhow
- Date posted
- 4y
@PoetART Thank you so much. And of course that is okay! And if you ever need to talk about it also, I’m here to talk. Ocd is definitely a tricky monster
- Date posted
- 4y
@c.cat Thank you. You too. Yeah it is. I mean my mother returned home and asked how I was and I told her “I’m trying to let it be, mom.” She’s been here for me for all my life, surround yourself with the best people and trust yourself. I know it’s all wishy washy talk but to be fair it is a rather deep subject matter
- Date posted
- 4y
Be really good with yourself right now. You’re at the point I’m at. Not knowing what it is to not think about the themes and about ruminating as a result. You’re probably extremely scared but much better than when it’s at it worse. Be so so good to yourself and just do what you wish to do, for me there is a point where the imbalance is so trained in me over time that it’s not helping how busy I stay. You just have to be good to yourself and trust yourself until you are calm. Look for the calm or as calm as possible. Always. Right there with you
- Date posted
- 4y
You have to do the high exposures sooner or later.
- Date posted
- 4y
Yeah I’m just scared I’m going to find out it’s true or make my ocd bad again.
- Date posted
- 4y
Hi Friend, i also feel this. Lot less anxious but certainty uncomfy accepting that uncertainty. Do the exposures. Let me know if you’d like to talk!
Related posts
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 25w
I find while doing exposures, rarely does my anxiety lessen. It usually amps up and stays that way for the remainder of the day. I could be having a fairly decent day, but dutifully do my exposures and then the rest of my day is anxiety filled. I guess that’s just how it is now? Also, I’m wondering if my therapist even believes I have OCD. I totally understand my therapist cannot provide reassurance. But it’s to the point it seems my therapist acts like I actually did the thing I fear. I feel so isolated.
- Date posted
- 24w
My biggest issue with things in my life are not feeling confident in things I want to do and feeling doubtful combined with anxiety. It makes me not want to do a whole lot of things outside of my comfort zone because I either feel I'm not ready for them or I don't deserve them. In the back of my mind, my brain tells me that I've done something in relation to POCD because of porn when I was a teenager and a time I tried to help a minor with OCD. Or that I've committed sexual harassment because of a time I tried to zip up a bag but didn't tuck my arm and it touched someone's behind when really I just didn't want to keep listening to my OCD about how much of a bad person I would be or bad things would happen if I didn't tuck my arm. I thought I would just very slightly brush up contact and it wouldn't matter that much but it just ended up happening in the worst way. I remember how extremely depressed this made me and I just feel like I don't deserve to go on because of these kind of thoughts, memories, and worries. These worries are what keeps me down from really living my life. Another part of this is I feel I need to just have my needs met before I can really carry on in life I also know that I can't keep waiting for things to feel right when I need to do them. Is this a sign of Just Right OCD? Needing my feelings to feel just right in order for me to do someone I really want to? I act on my feelings more than I do my rational and it definitely shows in my anxiety. This stuff holds my back on my dream goals, trying to get experience with relationships, going to school, and just overall being happier and caring a lot less about anxiety. I don't know how to get rid of them. I just try to let them pass. Sometimes that works, sometimes that doesn't. Being up at night is a trigger for this for sure.
- Date posted
- 23w
I’m struggling badly. I did something about a month ago which I now realize was probably testing, but what scares me is I feel like I liked it, which is horrifying. What’s even worse though, is after I did it, I was able to brush it off quickly and not be too bothered by it, as I was still very anxious on other thoughts I was experiencing. Now those thoughts are meaningless and THIS is what’s causing tremendous anxiety, but the fact that I didn’t feel anxiety about it after I did it seals the deal for me. I mean, did feel anxious and guilty after I did it, but I was able to dismiss it somewhat quickly, and I remember that memory came up a couple of times within the month after I did it but like I said, it hasn’t too hard to dismiss it. I really feel like it’s denial. The fact that I wasn’t that anxious about it and tried to justify it/dismiss it HAS to mean it’s been denial all this time, there just no way this is OCD :( Right now I’m anxious about the fact that I might’ve liked it AND the fact that I wasn’t anxious about it for a while. It is really just a torment to ruminate on, and I would never do that thing again, but the fact that I did it and felt like I liked it is beyond terrifying. I feel like I have proof now, I’m trying to figure out why I did it and what it meant, and why I wasn’t super anxious the following weeks after, I mean it WAS uncomfortable to think back on, but I feel like the fact I wasn’t super anxious about it means I was in denial or repressing my true self. I am so so scared. I’ve been worried about this for the past week and a half :( (This is all centered on the same theme btw.)
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