- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
I’m in the same situation as you. My anxiety is barely there now, which in hindsight I am thankful for, but now I feel worried as to why I’m not anxious and I’m so doubtful about who I am all while being concerned. It’s just a bundle of negative emotions and confusion on my end. I’m trying to do my higher exposures but I’m worried once I start doing them it will prove they are my desires. What I’m doing personally right now is trying to accept myself unconditionally and accept uncertainty while slowly getting myself to do the exposures. But it’s so hard
- Date posted
- 4y
I know. It really is... wow, so hard and so unfair. But please know, of all the mental illnesses out there this is one of the most unruly and I truly know that the people who suffer from it and at any tough level really are some of the more caring and you will always be ok. But I know that that doesn’t stop the fear. Please chat about it any time because I think it is good for people at same point to take. I hope that is ok any now
- Date posted
- 4y
@PoetART *i hope that is okay anyhow
- Date posted
- 4y
@PoetART Thank you so much. And of course that is okay! And if you ever need to talk about it also, I’m here to talk. Ocd is definitely a tricky monster
- Date posted
- 4y
@c.cat Thank you. You too. Yeah it is. I mean my mother returned home and asked how I was and I told her “I’m trying to let it be, mom.” She’s been here for me for all my life, surround yourself with the best people and trust yourself. I know it’s all wishy washy talk but to be fair it is a rather deep subject matter
- Date posted
- 4y
Be really good with yourself right now. You’re at the point I’m at. Not knowing what it is to not think about the themes and about ruminating as a result. You’re probably extremely scared but much better than when it’s at it worse. Be so so good to yourself and just do what you wish to do, for me there is a point where the imbalance is so trained in me over time that it’s not helping how busy I stay. You just have to be good to yourself and trust yourself until you are calm. Look for the calm or as calm as possible. Always. Right there with you
- Date posted
- 4y
You have to do the high exposures sooner or later.
- Date posted
- 4y
Yeah I’m just scared I’m going to find out it’s true or make my ocd bad again.
- Date posted
- 4y
Hi Friend, i also feel this. Lot less anxious but certainty uncomfy accepting that uncertainty. Do the exposures. Let me know if you’d like to talk!
Related posts
- Date posted
- 20w
My ocd is very cyclic so its themes change monthly, and they can feel so so inappropriate and scary to discuss. I’d love to start therapy and feel ready but my only concern is because my intrusive thoughts come in waves, I can have periods where I feel amazing and don’t experience what I’m experiencing now so what if that’s the case when I start? Any advice would be appreciated. It makes me feel like I’m a fake or that It isn’t bad enough to receive help.
- Date posted
- 10w
So my therapist told me to start telling myself every time I have an intrusive thought just say oh there’s that thought again, and don’t try to figure it out or do mental compulsions. Well our usual tactic of “there’s that thought/feeling again” is not working at all this morning. This morning I was having really bad anxiety, it hits hardest in the morning when I am lying in bed with my son and I know the thoughts could come at any minute. Well they did, and I immediately was like no please just think of anything else. Well in pushing away the thoughts, I had this really weird feeling like I couldn’t decipher between reality and images. I was just getting flashes of images that felt so real. Even though I could physically feel my body and know I wasnt engaging in the thought or acting on it. It was like a flash of anxiety that hit and I couldn’t tell what was real and wasn’t. So of course my mind starts trying to figure that feeling out and if what I was thinking about just happened. And no matter how many times I’ve tried to say there’s that thought/feeling again, I can’t let it go. I was physically conscious and could feel my body but mentally I couldn’t. It’s so weird and hard to explain. But I’ve been doubting and second guessing that moment all morning and I’m in a bad spiral, again. 😭 it’s like every time I think I’m moving forward I get sucked back in and feel like I can’t practice my tools anymore. I don’t know what I should do 😩
- Date posted
- 5w
I’m not making this post to gain any reassurance (my therapist would kill me lol) but I just need some support here as I feel so alone and lost. I’ve been in ERP for a few years now and it’s been a journey thus far. I’ve experienced many different themes but currently it’s on sexual themes and I’m being drowned by it. I have to do exposures with videos of girls making out or being sexual with each other and then basically sit with the discomfort after. My brain literally jumps all over the place all day long. It’s throwing every thing at me from shows that I watch where women who were once with men get with girls, family members that I have who are gay, it’s having me question if I love my husband or feel anything toward him anymore, I have these thoughts that I can’t get close to God because “I like women” while also having it tell me that’s it okay because gay people still follow God. The other thing that gets me is the guilt I feel with my kids. It’ll throw images of my kids at me and I cry instantly. My brain is constantly talking to itself if that makes any sense? Constantly battling itself throwing thoughts and feelings at me to prove that I’m supposedly gay and then the other part is firing back showing why none of it is true. It’s just a lot of noise all damn day ! Anyone get this?. I try to sit with it and let it just go at itself but now I’m being told that’s not what I’m supposed to do, that I’m supposed to interrupt it?. I really feel like there’s something wrong with me that this can’t just be OCD. Can anyone here share there experiences with these theme? Anyone experience my type of story? I feel like no matter what I do I can’t get out of this.
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