I just want to say... ERP WORKS! I cannot compare the amazing feeling achieved from facing our fears compared to the temporary “relief” from doing our compulsions. I know it’s scary at first but it’s so worth it!

Just distract yourself

Play games chill with friends enjoy life distract yourself eat better diet

I can totally relate with Backdoor spike. Ive come to realize that it is our rumination that is bringing us back into that trap. We can’t control our thoughts but we CAN control our rumination. That constant search for answers, to figure everything out like how do we feel about this thought?, what do we think about this?, what could this thought mean?is only keeping the cycle going. We need to practice letting the thought sit there and not engage with it. I usually say “okay I’m having this thought but I’m not going to figure it out and search for meaning or answers” and with practice you will be amazed how quickly they disappear. It’s time to break the cycle!

@Anonymous No matter what the content is, we will let that thought sit there and not engage!

@Anonymous That’s exactly what I believe! And I have practiced it on so many obsessions! I don’t know why it’s so hard for me to stop ruminating for this obsession!!! 🥺

@Madison Because OCD loves challenging... but HATES being challenged! It’s freaking out and looking for ways to get us back into its control

@Madison Don’t be hard on yourself if you have setbacks, we all do but we learn and keep practicing not ruminating no matter the content. At some point we feared in doing ERP but look at the light at the end of the tunnel. It’s all worth it at the end!

@Anonymous Do you feel like when your OCD is acting up it can feel like things are pointing to gut feelings

@Anonymous Could you give me more details please?

@Anonymous I am trying SO hard to stop ruminating and have been for months, I don’t know how I’ll ever get over this backdoor spike 😔

@Madison One of the keys to beating OCD is not about doing more.. it’s about doing less. I assume maybe you’re always on guard in case those obsessions and intrusive thoughts come? That will only make them come more frequently. I go about my day and let them come naturally. If they come I say “oh there you are again but I’m still not going to figure you out”. I feel for you because I know how it feels to be stuck and wonder if we’ll ever be back to who we were before our obsessions but the truth is that.. we STILL are that person and we are not going to let OCD lie to us

@Madison I definitely recommend you to read Dr. Michael J Greenberg’s Article about mental reviewing and rumination. It truly has helped me

@Madison Or you can go to Dr Wilson’s Website at Anxities.com and check out his videos. They truly are helpful

@Madison Anxieties.com*

@Anonymous When your OCD is really bad can every single thing feel like confirmation or proof or a gut feeling

@Anonymous Oh yes I definitely struggled with that and that is one of the reasons we still struggle. We gave it meaning when truly thoughts are just only thoughts

@Anonymous Do u understand why we give it meaning

@Anonymous Because of our OCD. Truth is people without OCD have intrusive thoughts just like us but the big difference is that they will say “wow that was weird” and quickly brush it off like nothing ever happened but with us who struggle with OCD we feel that means something about us. We get stuck with that thought and try to figure out it’s meaning on why we had that thought or what could it mean about us.

@Anonymous Or then I even start to think- if they're so strong about the same thing or person maybe they do hold some meaning??? :(

@Anonymous I completely understand you on that and that is exactly where OCD wants us. It wants 100% certainty but that is impossible because no matter what logic you use our OCD always strikes with the “WHAT IF” as you would know.

@Anonymous Where did this disgusting disorder come from????

@Anonymous There are many factors like genetics, environmental factors, the way you were brought up, sadly there is no clear answer but that doesn’t mean we can’t live a happy successful life

@Anonymous Are u on meds pal? I'm thinking about going on some

@Anonymous No I decided not going on that path because I didn’t want to become dependent on them and then learn how to live without them, you know? I really do recommend you to talk with a therapist so they can provide you with better advice and help. Talking to a therapist has helped me tremendously

@Anonymous Thanks so much! Ironically, I read almost all of Dr. Greenburg’s articles and had to stop because I kept using them for reassurance. I understand completely his view on rumination and have applied it to literally every other obsession, it has helped me so much! I understand about dropping justifications and taking the risk and that I can just stop... So I don’t know why it’s so hard to stop ruminating for this one!! 😢

@Madison I'm going through the same thing. Do you mind me asking what exactly this obsession is

@Anonymous Ok, this is bad: It’s rumination about rumination. *facepalm* OCD is so stupid. I’m obsessed with if I’m getting the therapy right or not — I’m terrified of doing thought suppression / ignoring it. My entire backdoor spike isn’t about any of my important themes (morality, sexuality, etc) — it’s just about the therapy itself! UGH, OCD is so stupid. :’( My therapist and I are working on this but none of the exposures I do for it trigger me, only the thoughts themselves do. :(

@Madison Because OCD only attacks what we value most in our lives because it knows that is the only way to keep up trapped. Once we challenge it, it panics and keeps looking for things to attach on but must not let that happen. We cannot let it keep us under control. We are not dogs to chase everything our brain throws at us.

@Anonymous So true! My Core Fear for this is “I’ll never get better if I don’t get the therapy right” but even though I am totally willing to face that fear and take the risk, I still find myself checking and wanting to figure it out! Any tips for how to get through this backdoor spike?! Intellectually I know how to beat OCD — I’ve done it for like 80-90% of my obsessions — and it’s soooo frustrating not to be able to do it for this! 🤦🏻‍♀️

I have Harm OCD and did ERP exercises that my therapist created based on my obsessions and compulsions. I really recommend you getting with a therapist!

You will, I know we can beat this ❤️ feel free to message me anytime you want to talk to someone

@Anonymous Ur sweet! It's very hard.. even myself I'm struggling why does it feel so real

@Anonymous That’s OCD in a nutshell, if it didn’t feel real it wouldn’t have power over us.

@Anonymous But don't you think the thoughts must stem from some truth

@Anonymous Thank you so much, you are so kind!