is tinder a trigger for hocd? for anyone else? but its also like im lonely but then the idea of meeting these guys in real life gives me anxiety and the thoughts of yeah your gay or asexual start popping up and then im like yeah i cant go on a date with these guys like theyre going on a date woth someone who has these intrusive thoughts they deserve better and what if i kiss bad and then there proof im gay its just and im 29 like i have literally kissed two guys in my life when i think about how little men ive done anything with it just confirms more to me like yup thats gay but i also think i should go on these dates as exposures ... i went on one recently but there was a little less pressure because it was a set up it feels worse when i think the guy is cute because if i go and there is no attraction well boom there we go proof my thoughts are right

thanks for responding im glad im not alone yeah these thoughts are annoying

@Anonymously Honestly our ocd attacks everything, you’re never alone with this theme it seems haha! You’re doing so well! :)

@Melodyocd thanks yeah have you been going on dates too? trying to do other exposures?

@Anonymously Honestly I don’t go on many dates, meeting new people is terrifying for me, especially with HOCD because I get worried if I don’t like the guy it means I’m gay/bi and I usually spend the whole time stressing which of course leaves me worrying about the date 😂 I did however go on one with a gay a few weeks ago, and he was really nice and sweet and we still chat now, I want to see him again but I didn’t feel a “spark” after our first date which made me really panic and worry about being gay/bi. I’ve been asked out by another guy but he wants me to travel quite far to see him (and obvs as someone with anxiety this is terrifying hahah). I have been doing other exposures though! Have you been going on dates? :)

@Melodyocd Omg meant a guy* not a gay! Making that type freaked me out haha

@Melodyocd lol that typo wouldve freaked me out too thats awesome though that you went on the date anyway i know that can be hard yeah i never date either when i was 23 i went on like 2 blind dates and this year my friends friend asked me out and it was horrible but i felt okay because like it was for personality clash reasons so i was like okay i didnt do too much ruminating after i still wonder about it sometimes in terms of hocd and that date going badly but yeah i do the same purposefully avoid anything that will make me question that stuff but yeah i dont blame you for stressing about traveling for this guy thats a lot of pressure on top of just standard anxiety plus hocd just yeah thats a lot but i wish you the best i hope we both can get to a point where these interactions arent a test in our mind

@Anonymously Awh same I honestly wish you the best too! It’s such a shame that our anxiety and ocd attacks this for us and makes dating difficult, I’d sooo love to get to the stage where I get excited about going on dates. I feel like once I get past the first few dates I’ll be fine tho tbh, I just wanna be comfortable with a guy and skip all the awkward and scariness hahah!

@Melodyocd lol same!

thanks 🙏