Anonymous
- Date posted
- 4y
RoganRogan
- Date posted
- 4y
I had it. But I know that I don't ruminate because i try to keep myself out of the endless and harmful loop that distresses me in order to heal not because I want to suppress anything. I broke the cycle when i decided that I can't figure out my sexuality in such a stressful state. So in order to understand myself I have to make the whole situation peaceful. The only thing is that when you get to the peaceful state the thoughts won't bother you since soocd won't have control over you any longer.
RoganRogan
- Date posted
- 4y
Sorry i thought you wrote about soocd but what i said can be applied to any type of ocd i believe.
__________________________
- Date posted
- 4y
I totally have felt this way. I got stuck in a rut feeling like this non stop and it crushed me. I got past it. I finally learned how to catch myself doing this. At that time I couldn’t write down a single thing I liked about myself... I finally realized I got a doctorate, my boyfriend loves me, people laugh at my jokes , etc. But for like a year I just hated myself because of my own thoughts. It’s a cycle once it starts and can be hard some days to see through it. But you gotta tell yourself reality is humans are complex. No one is perfect. Everyone is still figuring everything out day by day bc sometimes life is just hard. I used to hate myself for ruminating because it was self destructive. Now I catch myself and realize OK it’s ok to be self critical and to reflect on things about ourselves we want to improve or modify... like eating healthy for example... it’s not helpful to sit there and tell myself I’m disgusting and going to develop all these health problems because I drink a lot of Red Bull and eat junk food.... now I’m trying to eat a little healthier and don’t sit there beating myself up over some Oreos and try to catch myself when I freak out over made up health problems. For example
NOCD Advocate Jess, CPSSNOCD Advocat...
- User type
- NOCD Alumni
- Date posted
- 4y
Not so much that same thought but mine is like... is this rumination or something you just actually want to think about. 🤔 🙄ocd smh
NOCD Advocate Jess, CPSSNOCD Advocat...
- User type
- NOCD Alumni
- Date posted
- 4y
Also just read 2nd part of your post. You're not losing yourself. You are you no matter what OCD thoughts you have. Stick with the ERP and you will have more and more moments without it being in the forefront so you can feel more joy and more like yourself.
Related posts
nevieocal
- Date posted
- 25w
Can someone please help me?
I think when people are saying OCD is egodystonic is really triggering me and I was just wondering if this has happened to anyone else? I’m going through a really bad relapse and right now I’m trying to figure out if my thoughts are truly egodystonic, like I how do I know I won’t act on them, how can I trust my emotions and everything. I feel really confused and I feel like I don’t know who I am anymore or how I carry on with life because it’s so long and I’m so unsure of everything that’s going on in my head. Like how do I know that this is OCD and true desires/urges. I’m so confused.
Anonymous
- Date posted
- 18w
Feel lost and without hope
I dont know what to do anymore. I think Ive had the 'pure O' version of OCD for more than ten years. I feel like so much of my life has been wasted from this disease. For the longest time I just tried to ignore the intrusive thoughts, and push them off as anxiety, and basically dissociated for years of my life. Feels like Ive just been on autopilot and a shell of myself for nearly 15 years. Its actually hard to even imagine of all the experiences, emotions, connections with others, and personal growth that Ive missed out on- if I do, I think it would be too much to handle. I think Ive even forgot and dont even know at this point what it is to live a normal life and experience positive emotions. Now that I sought treatment for it specifically, it feels like it's gotten worse. Like by acknowledging that part of myself, suddenly added focus just makes it more real and in the forefront now. I wonder if I am actually going insane. Will not go into details for reassurance but the thoughts just rip my soul out. Its so difficult as well because I will get random 'clarity moments' throughout the day where I feel like Ive solved something, then get completely derailed by another OCD thought stream and forget everything. It feels like Im just on a merry-go-round of hell, not going anywhere thinking I am at times.
LizM99
- Date posted
- 17w
Is this something OCD does?
Whenever anyone starts to feel like their thoughts are less triggering or they feel a moment of happiness/ relief OCD tells you that you want the thoughts back or you actually like having the thoughts and maybe thats just the person I really am? I feel like im going insane😢
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