- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 4y
just conquer your fear. go out and meet new people
Thank you โค definitely trying! Not always sure where though in a small town but I have been going to a small group and music night so it's a start ๐คท
I totally feel this! I'm 19ยฝ now and my ocd and GAD really kicked in when I was in 6th grade, so about 7 years ago, and it made growing up so much harder.. I lost all of my social skills because I isolated myself for years, and I quit my old job because of my depression and anxiety last July and haven't been able to get another job since because my anxiety is just THAT bad. I will say though, making online friends was definitely the first step I took and it helped me a lot! I've lost and gained some amazing friends online and it's easier for me to be myself with someone I've never met, so it's helped me with people irl too! before COVID hit, like Jan-Feb 2020, I started making up for lost time by training myself to go to places that made my nervous for various reasons, because I've always had issues with going into big public places like the mall, and I was finslly able to start going out for hours with low anxiety. COVID messed that up for me big time though, because I couldn't go anywhere for like 5 months but ๐คช๐คช๐คช๐คช it did help me when I could use that tip. As for possible relationships? Honestly that's still a grey area for me too. I've had a bf for almost 10 months now, but I deal with ROCD and I've caused a lot of unnecessary problems, but I also try to remember how I felt about past situations with my ROCD and how I can handle them differently the next time something similar happens. At the end of the day, I'm definitely in the same boat as you, and I do hope you can find things thay work for you! I know how exhausting this is, but I know you can do it!
Thank you so much โบ typing all that out was so nice! I definitely have tried to get out of my comfort zone and have been able to go to a music night for college students in my community. It has been a lot of fun but also scary as people often talk in circles of people and that TERRIFIES me lol BUT I keep going! I have also tried to find things where I can be social that are a bit more comfortable for me. My friend has a Bible study group and I think I may try to join because I prefer smaller groups of people. I am hoping I can find a job this next semester. I am in college and there are jobs on campus. I just hope I can find something not too anxiety inducing because I am afraid employers wouldn't understand. I just have been super worried about my future lately. I am afraid I will never be able to get a job and will be alone forever because I'm scared of talking to guys lol but I keep trying to take things one day at a time and go to therapy ๐ you seem like a great person and I am glad to know I am not the only one who feels this way!
@Anyonomous I'm the same way! big groups of people are definitely NOT for me. I like to hang with no more than 3 people at a time lmao but a bible study group sounds great! it's definitely a good way to connect with people on multiple levels. but I'm the same way with jobs :( I was at my old job for over a year and I had so many anxiety attacks while working, and there was even one time where a customer pulled me aside and gave me tips on how to deal with it and I was just ๐ฅบ๐ฅบ๐ฅบ๐ฅบ but it's always difficult for me to he somewhere where I can't sit down, so that was a big problem for me tbh and the masks did NOT help (even though I'm very pro-mask). but I think getting an easy job on campus would be a good idea! just make sure to ask your employer/s all the important questions so yk EXACTLY what you're getting into, because idk if you're like this too, but surprises are not for me ๐๐๐๐ค๐ป anddddd about the therapy, same! I'm actually onto my 3rd therapist now and she's doing everything I wish my old therapists could've done for me. I hope that's going well for you! and whew I feel you on that relationship stuff. before I met my current bf, I was lowkey just kinda hoing around because guys kept f**king me over and I got terrified at the thought of catching feelings and doing actual flirting, because I trusted no maN- but I definitely think it's important to recognize what you want and need and that'll help u weed em out and find a good one for you when the time is right <3 but there's no rush to get into a relationship asap~ and you're definitely not the only one! living with GAD is so much worse than I can explain to people, like this is exhausting ๐ but I always try to keep the faith, especially for other people! you got this!!!!! โค
@amberellal Yes! It so exhausting! Like anxiety is a full time job ๐ but I am just going to keep trying haha. And I am on my second therapist! My first one was nice but knew nothing about OCD which was what I needed most help with at the time. Now I have one on here who is great and my symptoms have gone way down! I also have another through my school who is helping me with my more general, social stuff (and she's free so....). Honestly I'm just so grateful for the help I have gotten bc if not who knows how much worse I would be. I'm happy you have found a counselor that works for you too! It can be sooo hard to find the right fit!!
@Anyonomous EXACTLY, it literally is a full time job ๐๐ค๐ป but YAY IM SO PROUD OF U! ik I don't know you but it makes me so happy when someone dealing with this kind of mental illness can make progress, because ik how hard and frustrating it is for a lot of people ^u^ I'm so happy your therapist is working out for you and getting you the help you need! my therapist is definitely doing the same and I'm so grateful for her. my first two therapist were those classic "and how does that make you feel?" 24/7 therapists and never really wanted to understand why I felt the way I did, yk? but it is definitely hard to find the right one ๐๐๐๐ for a while I wanted to give up but I'm so glad I didn't. I've only been seeing my current therapist for about a month now and I've already made so much progress in some areas. not so much with my anxiety or ocd, but more with my physical issues that fed into my mental issues. but I hope for nothing but the best for you and I hope you only see improvement! you got this!
@amberellal Aw thank you so much ๐ญ ur so sweet. I wish the same to you!! Thanks for being so kind and supportive!! We need more people like that in the world โค
@Anyonomous you're just as sweet! and right back at you~ I'm here to support everybody, because I know how tough this is ๐๐ค๐ป so I just wanna uplift everybody and give them that extra push and confidence boost~
This is a daunting, but achieveable thing... jus remember ocd will be with you anywhere u go, the key it to recognise when it's most likely to show up, (this isn't always obvious, ik) but the more you notice it.. the better you can handle it. Everything else is your life, dont let ocd stop you from living. โค
That is so true โค I have got to quit letting OCD run my life and just start living it even if OCD runs in the background
Sameโฆ I lost pretty much half of my teen years due to OCD, anxiety, terrible teachers, and a terrible paychiatrist. I isolated myself at college for the past 2 years and now Iโm becoming more social but itโs still difficult for me to talk to people because itโs so scary. Plus, 2 of my closest friends moved away from my young adults church group and now I just feel really lonely. Meeting new people by myself is like running naked in the middle of a city. Sometimes itโs so bad that I canโt make eye contact or turn my face towards them when speaking or listening. Most of the problems stemmed from horrible social experiences Iโve had in the past and now I can be super wary of people including my friends in general ao they donโt backstab or leave me for their own sakes.
Same :( my teen years were mainly spent anxious and suffering from undiagnosed OCD. College was a new chance for me and I felt like I blew. I went to a super small H.S. (graduated with 4 other people ๐ ) and so I kind if isolated in college. I was commuting from half and hour away and it was super hard to make friends. I feel like I am branching out more now but I may be graduating a year early (its my Jr. year of college) and that freaks me out bc i feel like I am just starting to try and make friends ๐ i TOTALLY relate to the running naked in the city thing. Exactly how I feel! I am so scared people will hate me so I am scared to try!
Hi, Iโm new here!! Iโm praying I donโt get judged for this. But, back in late May of 2022 ( literally right before I graduated high school), I added this one random girl from my school on Snapchat. She posted something about a graduation party , so I swiped up on her story basically saying how I canโt believe weโre almost graduated. She replied and we had a really short and simple conversation. The next day ( i believe) , we started talking a lot , and I just so happened to see her at the highschool when we were grabbing our graduation outfits and doing the rehearsal. When I saw her irl, I kinda got turned off ( I heard she was kinda crazy) , and on top of that , she was a little ugly irl. I remember seeing her Snapchat bio , and she was close friends with my female cousin ( a year younger than me) , who I happened to experiment sexually with when I was 10-11 years old. I remember going to work later that day and having sort of a lightbulb flick thought ( it wasnโt a good thought though) , what if my cousin told her about what happened when we were younger? So I started to kind of panic and immediately distanced myself from that girl. I also experimented sexually with one of my female friends when I was 10-11 , and from that day onwards, Iโve been pretty much living in paranoia and a little bit of guilt about someone finding out and my life being ruined . On top of that, Itโs gotten worse to now sometimes I wonder if a girl I added off of quick add ( Snapchat) is underage even if they told me they were 18+ or had 18 and above in their bio, and I get so much guilt and anxiety about that. I even had a quick thought last February on what if I did something inappropriate with my younger cousin when I was 15-16 but I just canโt exactly remember when it happened , and it still eats me alive when I think about it, because I donโt know if it happened or not. Iโm sorry for the long vent, I just wish I felt normal again. No matter how much I try to do things that old me used to do, life always feels โ offโ. I always kept the top part about when I was younger a secret up until early (ish ) 2024, then I vented to one of my best friends and he told me that thatโs a normal thing to do at a young age. Since then, I have told multiple friends and they all say they did similar stuff, but my brain just canโt accept that. Please help me, I quite literally overthink everything nowadays. 2021 was the last full year that I felt normal ( coincidentally, the best year of my life so far) . Itโs not just about sexual related things either, sometimes Iโll wonder if I messed up something at work or hit a car while driving/hit someone and drove off. I just wanna live my life how I was supposed to live it after highschool ( carefree and happy) before whatever it is ( I think itโs ocd) hit me unexpectedly. Thanks to anyone who read this , I just needed to pour it out regardless of how negative I felt typing this, I hope someone can relate , because I feel so alone in my head at times.
So, I know my capacity to get fixated on things. And it's normally something that's relatively remote but, my latest issue is really getting to me and I was wondering if people have any advice. I'm avoiding getting too into specifics, as I don't want this to get reassurance-y but, in essence.. I came to the realisation recently that people who I'd been "friends" (feels like the wrong term now) when I was younger were not very nice people, and normalized a lot of very unpleasant behaviour towards other members of the group. They really normalized it, sold themselves as figures of authority, as older and more responsible and grown-up than others, and looking back, they acted horribly. And coming to this realisation, that I'd been manipulated into just accepting their behaviour has just... broken me. My OCD has latched onto it and I can't stop feeling irreversibly tainted by it. I've talked to others about it, and they've reassured me, told me it's not a big deal and that I hold myself to too high a standard, but none of that sticks. I feel better for a bit, then think 'Maybe when you told them you were skewing it to make yourself look better' or 'Did you leave out a crucial detail'. I keep ruminating over and over, trying to remember exactly how everything played out, trying to figure out if I fed into the behaviour, if I did something bad myself (because y'know, I feel like I was accepting of it at the time, so what does it say about my own values?). I know I need to stop doing all this if I want to improve, but then some part of me keeps saying 'So, you're just going to let yourself off the hook then?' Normally, I can rationalize my own fears to some degree, assure myself something won't happen, but the realness of the situation, and the fact I only came to understand the reality of it because the thought had been bothering me means it feels so much more all-encompassing. I know confessing in itself is a compulsion, but I keep feeling that if I'm not I'm somehow concealing what I 'really am' from others around me, and any positive interactions are me deceiving them in some way. I feel like I can't enjoy anything in life right now, and a good part of me feels I should not enjoy it ever again. If anybody has any advice on it, I'm all ears. Or even hearing if you relate to these feelings, I might appreciate the solidarity at least.
Hello, I unknowingly have lived with ROCD or OCD (not sure what one. Iโm new to this). It has ruined so many amazing romantic and platonic relationships and I am so sad that just now I am finding out what the hell is wrong with me. Maybe life would be different if I have known. My OCD and anxiety is at an all time high (ATH) due to some horrible events that have happened in the recent months. I am at the point where paranoia has taken over my life now. I had my first panic attack a few weeks ago where I fainted. My anxiety attacks are so extreme I go thought cognitive distortion that has lasted days. My girlfriend of 3 years is my emotional guardian and she no long has the energy to be that and honestly itโs not her responsibility to be that. She is bi and wanted to have an open relationship and for someone who has OCD this has not been good for me. She also was assaulted in my own home by a good friend of ours when I was out of town but itโs not a clear situation because it sounded consensual at first. I just left my very high paying job. I am financially secure but the job was emotionally abusive and looking back made my OCD worse. I am taking some time off to get my head rightโฆbut now, all I have to do during the day is live in my OCD. Iโm very happy I finally figured out why I act the way I do but I donโt know if I can get better quick enough to save my relationship. I have never been so worried about myself (M 28 years old). I am a confident young professional and never thought I would be writing on a page like this. AnywayโฆI hope it gets better.
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