- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
One time I became intensely obsessed that I was in the same concept of the movie “Inception”. I have a lot of occasional fears that I’m “already dead and I don’t know it”. I’m not sure if this helps. I’m also not sure if it is OCD related, but I assume so because it all is based on “what if’s”
- Date posted
- 4y
I have this too. I feel like this aren’t real. It’s an awful feeling.
- Date posted
- 4y
Yes, I had that during the "psychosis" ... I felt afraid I was dead and in hell at times during it. It was intense terror/anxiety.
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- 4y
@Being Human Do you mind me asking… did you have meds? Did they help? I’m so scared of antipsychotic meds.
- Date posted
- 4y
@Liz F Yes, I've been on seroquel extended release (first episode) then zyprexa (second episode). They helped me! One of my main issues was insomnia and they really helped with that. I'd recommend giving them a shot. Getting a good psychiatrist who you trust and will work with you on your fears and finding something that helps is key.
- Date posted
- 4y
Yes it felt extremely weird I understand what you mean. What was it like for you?
- Date posted
- 4y
Thanks for responding. It felt like extreme harm OCD for me ... hypervigilance about someone hurting me or my family, or me unintentionally hurting someone while I was sleeping (a fear of sleepwalking and accidentally killing someone). I have those kind of thoughts occasionally but during the "psychosis" they were incredibly intense. Mine presented mostly as paranoia. I definitely had some bizarre thoughts, but that's the way my ocd often presents. I think maybe it was a combo of cptsd (emotional flashbacks) and anxiety/ocd. Even when I saw my therapist during that time, she was reassuring me it was "just" anxiety. But I had to be hospitalized eventually. I feel like it is rare for people to really understand ocd so I think that it gets missed sometimes. What was yours like?
- Date posted
- 4y
@Being Human I’m currently experiencing this! I could have wrote this word for word. I am also experiencing things feeling wrong and weird. I have 3 kids and I don’t want to be hospitalized but I really need help. My husband thinks I’m making this up and God knows I wish I was. I’m scared I’ll be given meds that won’t help.
- Date posted
- 4y
@Liz F I'm so sorry. It was a nightmare to experience. Getting on the right medication and sleeping was key. I also was treated for Lyme disease again (Iong story). That was 2 years ago. It has gotten so much better. Do you have a psychiatrist? I'd definitely talk with one about your symptoms.
- Date posted
- 4y
@Being Human You definitely aren’t alone in those feelings. Sometimes it’s an intense like “tickle” in my head that feels like an urge but it’s really anxiety and tension. I also get PTSD in which I experience depersonalization and dissassociation so it just adds to the feeling of losing control. And even at some points it’s gotten so bad that my OCD will grasp at anything to make me spiral for example like magical thinking with aliens and shit. it’s so stupid because I know rationally what’s going on but my mind tries to grasp at anything. So just know you aren’t alone at all.
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- 4y
@Being Human I am going to a walk in facility tomorrow. Waiting to see a psychiatrist in my area is a month or longer.
- Date posted
- 4y
I think I’m going through that now. Ever since I had my son my OCD has turned into something else I think. I’m scared and mentally exhausted from trying to hold on and not go crazy.
- Date posted
- 4y
I'm so sorry. 💞 I hope you're able to get help for it and see progress. Medication, therapy, various self care and other practices, have all helped me. I do *a lot* of personal work. There's always more to heal and more growth.
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- 4y
@Being Human Thank you so much for talking to me about it😭❤️
- Date posted
- 4y
@Liz F Of course!! Happy to offer support and share my experience. 💞🙏
- Date posted
- 4y
Yes, sometimes it can be a long wait if you don't have an established relationship with a psychiatrist. I call mine in between appointments if I need help.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 16w
I’ve never been diagnosed with OCD, but I relate so much to what people here are going through. I used to think it was just anxiety, and I felt like I could handle that. But lately I’ve been spiraling—constantly afraid that what I’m feeling is something worse, like psychosis or losing control of my mind. I feel so detached and scared, and I just want peace again. I have anxiety doing the smallest things, like the thought of waking up everyday and even eating give me straight up panic. I am afraid all the time, it’s paralyzing. And a lot of people say someone with psychosis wouldn’t worry that they’re in it, but then I convince myself I’ve been in it this whole time, and haven’t known, and that maybe I’ve been doing weird stuff. Idk. I also get really scared of labels. Even the idea of OCD makes me feel like I’ll never get better or like I’ll be stuck like this forever. I just want to be okay. If anyone has felt this way—confused, overwhelmed, or scared of what’s happening in their mind—I’d really appreciate any support or encouragement.
- Date posted
- 7w
My OCD diagnosis is still very new, but now that I know what it is, it is clearly something I’ve had for as long as I can remember. Contamination/bugs and health have been a consistent theme since childhood, but religious/existential themes emerged during adolescence. Around that same time, there was also a good deal of trauma, and during middle school I started experiencing hallucinations. Tactile (like bugs crawling on me or biting me, an eyelash being stuck in my eye, but nothing was really there); visual (like moving shadows or things that would dart past in my periphery, and then I would just have intrusive thoughts of scary things around corners or under things); and auditory (an angry male voice that grumbles or yells indistinctly, or a high pitched noise like a microphone/speaker feedback but muffled and less sharp). Because of the religious denomination I grew up in, I initially assumed these were demons and tried to address it that way, but when I was 14 or 15, it occurred to me that those voices/sounds sounded like the way I felt, and the visual/tactile experiences happened during times of stress too — and so all of those experiences could just be seen as an expression of a fragmented part of myself. That acceptance didn’t make them go away — I still experience them now and I’m in my 30s — but it made those experiences less scary and more manageable. I also see now how these all pop up specifically when OCD obsessions are super triggered and when I’m super sleep deprived. Anyway! Since this diagnosis, and talking about the hallucinations at all, are new to me, I am wondering who else has had similar experiences. I don’t really know how much of the hallucination experience is OCD versus trauma, but it seems like this might all make sense under the “quasi-hallucination” label.
- Date posted
- 12d
My OCD is directly tied to my PTSD from being hospitalized in the past. I feel incredibly alone because of this. I’m 26 and was hospitalized twice - once when I was 14 for an eating disorder, where I experienced solitary confinement and SA. Then again when I was 22 for depression, where I was “cold-turkey” from one of my medications and almost had a heart attack. I’m traumatized because of these events and struggle with “insanity OCD” that directly ties into my trauma where I get terrified I’ll “lose control” and do something that will cause me to be hospitalized against my will and taken away from my loved ones. I’m scared to even seek therapy or reach out. If anyone has similar experiences/lived experience I’d greatly appreciate your guidance. Please forgive any grammatical errors; I’m not in the best state of mind rn.
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